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Our dog just died and my DD (3) is devastated. She loves the neighborhood dogs and we know eventually we want to get one. Do we:
1. Get one soon, let her grow up with the dog, but have to lose the dog when she is a teenager or younger or 2. Wait until she is 10ish and hope the dog passes when she is in or out of college? Thanks. |
| There's no right answer here. |
| Agree, no right answer. We just got our 8 and 10 year olds their first dog. It’s been great because they can help a lot with the dog and are big enough to be gentle to a puppy and not pull it’s tail, etc. The help part was important to us so I wasn’t stuck doing all the work. Why don’t you wait 3-6 months to re-evaluate. No need to decide right now. |
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There is no right answer. We had our 2 dogs already when we adopted DD as a baby. She is now 7 and the dogs are 8 and 10. They will probably pass during her early teens years. It is what it is. If she loves dogs and you can take care of a dog then get one now for her to grow up with.
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This is totally up to you. Having a dog and a young child is definitely manageable but it's work. You have to train the dog, train your child (no pulling tail, pick up your legos he can swallow, no tug of war etc) and manage their interactions at all times. It's not safe to leave a young child alone with a dog, even a gentle one, and you can't expect a young child to help much with dog related chores.
And of course, as you know, there's no guarantee a dog will live a long time. |
| OP here, our dog and one of our two cats died this year, so I'm not rushing to do anything for at least a year. DD is/was soooo good with them all. We do have another baby due at the end of the year. |
| No right answer, though in my friend group people tended to get a puppy when youngest kid was approx. first grade aged. We did right before my youngest started K after losing our beloved older dog when my kids were 4 and almost 3. It worked well for us as I wasn’t ready for another dog sooner and the kids were at a better age for handling a puppy. My kindergartener actually was better with the pup than my older child though so you never know. |
We were in the same spot. My dog died while I was 9 months pregnant. In some ways that death made the past year just a blur because I was so devastated and then sleep deprived with a newborn. Baby is a year old now and the time still isn't right. My 3 year old is really rough with the baby, so I'm sure she'd be rough with a dog. We're planning on waiting to get a new dog until the pain of losing our old dog is gone. It might be a few years. |
OP again, the dog was my husbands before we moved in together - the cats were mine. My cat died at 12 and had cancer so we had to euthanize. The dog was 14 and dropped dead, it was expected so didn't hurt me as much. |
| Depends who you ask - I just got a puppy with 3 kids age 7, 4 and 15 months. It's great. Some people think I am nuts. |
| Any age. Waiting because you think the kid will take on more responsibility tends to backfire - they help but you still end up doing most of it. So I'd say go with when you want to get another, and kids will enjoy/help in their own age-appropriate ways. We've always had dogs and my kids adore them - they've experienced multiple losses and also the joys of getting new dogs. It's a roller coaster but it's been great for them. |
You are thinking too hard. Do you want a dog now and have the bandwidth to train one? Do you want one? |
Having her beloved dog die while she is in college is not going to make it any less difficult for her. As an old friend of mine once said "Hello means Goodbye" at some point. There is no way to time these things. Waiting a little bit until she is less traumatized would probably be a good idea though. |
I would get one now. Our kids are in college and we have an old dog. She gets us up at 4-5am every morning to pee. She needs a house/pet sitter that is in the house most of the day when we go or else all her PTSDs come back (she is a rescue, she was an adult when we rescued her). By the time, she is gone, our kids will have graduated and possibly moved back. Empty nest, isn't quite as empty. If you are likely to get another dog after this one, I would get one now too. |
When do you want a dog? That is all that really matters. |