How welcoming is your moms club?

[Anonymous]

We moved last year and I joined one and it seems super cliquey. The moms already know each other. Kids go to same schools and do activities together. At the moms group events, new people are essentially ignored. I feel like I’m intruding on their conversations.

How has your experience been?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We moved last year and I joined one and it seems super cliquey. The moms already know each other. Kids go to same schools and do activities together. At the moms group events, new people are essentially ignored. I feel like I’m intruding on their conversations.

How has your experience been?

Similar experience and if yours is religious based be prepared for the women to talk about that too..

[Anonymous]

Same.

[Anonymous]

I belong to a Moms group but its not part of the Moms club affiliation if that makes sense. I joined it when DD was 8 mos and she is now 6. I have loved it and made some really great friends. I am still a member even though my kid is school age because we do special events and stuff in the summer.
I can see how as a new person it may seem the way you describe but I am not sure how to change that.
We have 50ish members and about 10 of those are new in the last couple of months. I feel like the newer members with babies the same ages should try and get to know each other but they don't seem to want to do that. We do a moms night out once a month ( no kids) and literally none of the new Moms have ever signed up for it.
We provide meals for new Moms too, when they have a 2nd or 3rd child. Its always the same people that sign up, Its always a good week or two before the slots are filled in so its not like the slots are filled up quickly and no one can sign up. I am of the " village" mentality but a lot of our newer Moms are not. I brought this up to a friend ( also in the group) and she told me not every one is looking for a Village.

So I think you get out of it what you put into it. Make the effort to keep going and sign up for stuff. Try and meet the new Moms that are less established like you are.

[Anonymous]

I think sometimes you have to do these kind of things for your kids. The activities and play groups are good for them, and if you happen to make friends too, great, if not, well you got the kids out of the house and interacting with other kids. Yes, there’s probably already some existing friendships amongst the people who have somewhat older kids (elementary age) and have known each other since the kids were babies. But this is such a transient area with people moving in and out, and people have new babies all the time. My moms club was small and clique-y for awhile until we happened to get a bunch of newer moms with babies/young toddlers, then the events became much more well-attended and new friendships started to form.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We moved last year and I joined one and it seems super cliquey. The moms already know each other. Kids go to same schools and do activities together. At the moms group events, new people are essentially ignored. I feel like I’m intruding on their conversations.

How has your experience been?

I had a similar experience when I joined a Moms Club in Maryland. Prior to that I was in a moms group that assigned people to playgroups based on their childrens’ birthdays, and I was in a group with 5 other moms with infants the same age. It was great because we were all able to bond over the experience of being new moms. I think it’s always harder once kids are older and have preschool schedules, established friendships, etc.

[Anonymous]

Same. It sucked.

[Anonymous]

I had the same experience, plus the kids were all preschoolers and mine was a baby. Even the moms with babies had older kids so had known each other longer. I stopped going to things after 3 events.

[Anonymous]

What are these moms groups and where do you find them? My kid is already in preschool so maybe I am already too late for this

[Anonymous]

I would say mine is really welcoming. But there's a huge bonding experience making it through the newborn stages with other moms. It's not the same when I meet new moms later when our kids are toddlers. Also.... I don't have much bandwidth to meet new moms now. Like got stressful after maternity leave.

[Anonymous]

WTF is a Moms' Club? Are these for real?

I'm so glad my kids are older and we didn't have this foolishness.

[Anonymous]

I have a 4 yo and have never heard of a Moms club.

But your post is making the OP of this thread come to mind:

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/801370.page

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:WTF is a Moms' Club? Are these for real?

I'm so glad my kids are older and we didn't have this foolishness.

This isn't newfangled thing. My kids are teens and I was in a moms club when they were little.

I think it can be hard to break in and make new friends with a large group. If it offers the opportunity to join a smaller playgroup w/ kids the same age, that's much better. Some of my best friends today I met via a playgroup when my oldest was a toddler.

[Anonymous]

For those of you who asked what MOMS Club is: https://momsclub.org

There are chapters based on territories broken down by school zones.

I've been in MOMS Club for the past 2 years and can't say I have really bonded with anyone in the club. There are definitely those who hang out more than others, the same moms who always go to the same events, etc. I also don't try that hard to connect with them because to connect with them, you usually have to go to almost every thing they put on the calendar. So it is partly my fault. The best way I have found to break into this group is to join one of their age-based playgroups because then you're on the same schedule with the same group and can build a rapport.

[Anonymous]

It's like sororities, except now you're an adult and buying friends didn't work well even back in the day..