The way that your partner speaks of their ex

[Anonymous]

I never could get over the way a former partner spoke of his ex wife. He told me about her depression, which he said had nothing to do with the abortion he made her have because she got pregnant "too early" in the marriage. He said that all she cared about later on was getting pregnant again. He talked about her wanting sex only to try to get pregnant. Then after years of "wasting" money on infertility, and his adultery, they divorced. Then he went on about how he didn't have to pay alimony because she made enough to support herself.
Another friend told me about how his ex wife would never find a man since she had two autistic kids (his kids), and a limp from childhood polio.
Wow! People, isn't this kind of talk a turnoff?

[Anonymous]

It says everything about this character. Seems very obviously to me without need validation from strangers

[Anonymous]

My BF says he loved her and admired her but left because she demanded too much after kids. How to interpret?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I never could get over the way a former partner spoke of his ex wife. He told me about her depression, which he said had nothing to do with the abortion he made her have because she got pregnant "too early" in the marriage. He said that all she cared about later on was getting pregnant again. He talked about her wanting sex only to try to get pregnant. Then after years of "wasting" money on infertility, and his adultery, they divorced. Then he went on about how he didn't have to pay alimony because she made enough to support herself.
Another friend told me about how his ex wife would never find a man since she had two autistic kids (his kids), and a limp from childhood polio.
Wow! People, isn't this kind of talk a turnoff?

Seems like it’s a good thing that he is a former partner !

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My BF says he loved her and admired her but left because she demanded too much after kids. How to interpret?

He resents expectations of helping with childcare. Probably expects wife to take care of most/all domestic duties, possibly in addition to working outside the home. Given the limited info, that would be my guess since that attitude is extremely common in men.

[Anonymous]

Troll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My BF says he loved her and admired her but left because she demanded too much after kids. How to interpret?

He left the kids? and the mother? sad.
I wouldn't buy it. He sounds lazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My BF says he loved her and admired her but left because she demanded too much after kids. How to interpret?

How to interpret - he’s grooming you not to expect too much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My BF says he loved her and admired her but left because she demanded too much after kids. How to interpret?

He resents expectations of helping with childcare. Probably expects wife to take care of most/all domestic duties, possibly in addition to working outside the home. Given the limited info, that would be my guess since that attitude is extremely common in men.

This. Couldn’t handle being a parent. Giant red flag.

[Anonymous]

When my exH pursued me, he labeled many of his exes as boring, and praised how low-maintenance I was. Little did I know that one day I'd become boring and that praising me for low-maintenance was a way to tell me to expect nothing from him. ALWAYS listen to what they're telling you.

[Anonymous]

My BF rarely talks about his ex and when he does he just says that she is a good mother. They share their kids 50/50 and I think he just wants his kids to have a good relationship with both parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My BF rarely talks about his ex and when he does he just says that she is a good mother. They share their kids 50/50 and I think he just wants his kids to have a good relationship with both parents.

All good things.

[Anonymous]

“My BF says he loved her and admired her but left because she demanded too much after kids. How to interpret?”

If he is my exH, it means that he has unacknowledged and unmanaged ADHD and depression, and he truly can’t manage much in life other than maintaining his (lower level than what it could be) job, spending some time with the kids (feeding and taking them to activities, but not actual parenting like paying attention to whether they do their homework or knowing about their relationships with their friends) and living in a rental apartment.

[Anonymous]

Yup, how they discuss their ex is very telling. I expect respect. If you can't be respectful of somebody who was married to you or who was with you for any significant length of time, I'm sorry, you aren't the one for me.

[Anonymous]

Your former partner is a creep.

I would stay if possible talk to their ex. If they are divorced go into the county and see what happened. People lie a lot and tend to elevate their behavior. If you see restraining orders...run! Or drug testing...etc.