Am I an alcoholic or do I just love to drink?

[Anonymous]

I’m having trouble with my alcohol consumption. It’s been creeping up for some time and despite my desire to cut back, I keep refilling my wine glass while hanging on the couch with DH. I never get drunk, or even buzzed, but I think it’s interfering with my sleep and I’m putting on weight. I’m also menopausal and under lots of stress lately, so it’s all related I’m sure. I’m looking for some motivation to quit. I’ve tried the Whole30, and it worked great but I’m not up for it just now. DH is no help as he drinks more than me. Any good books or advice out there?

[Anonymous]

If I had a glass of wine for every friend going through menopause who has asked the same question, I'd be quite drunk.

Not sure what that indicates though.

[Anonymous]

why do you want to quit? If you are going through stress doesn’t wine help you let go of stress? I would rather change other habits such as drinking more water, walking or running, eating fruits and avoiding processed snacks.

[Anonymous]

I was exactly like you. My one wine a night had crept to 2 and a half over many years. It wasn’t doing anything - I didn’t feel buzzed and it felt like a bad habit. I was contemplating whether I need to up my night time wine habit to 3 glasses!

I ended up reading The Naked Mind after a recommendation on here. It really worked for me. I actually don’t feel like a wine at night anymore. In fact I don’t really feel like drinking all that much.

It has now been a month of no drinking and I am sleeping better and have lost 5 lbs. I am not a big person so this is a lot for me. I would recommend reading it.

[Anonymous]

I feel like The Naked Mind is mentioned so much on here, from the many different threads like these. I had never heard of it outside of DCUM. Is there a marketing person on here touting this??

[Anonymous]

Instead of a bottle of a standard size bottle wine, get half bottles, or switch to craft beer or cidern (in 12 oz cans or bottles). That way opening more is a more deliberate effort than just pouring some more.

[Anonymous]

Swap it for something else. Get ginger ale or some sort of gourmet soda - something that still feels like a treat but doesn't have alcohol in it. Worked for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m having trouble with my alcohol consumption. It’s been creeping up for some time and despite my desire to cut back, I keep refilling my wine glass while hanging on the couch with DH. I never get drunk, or even buzzed, but I think it’s interfering with my sleep and I’m putting on weight. I’m also menopausal and under lots of stress lately, so it’s all related I’m sure. I’m looking for some motivation to quit. I’ve tried the Whole30, and it worked great but I’m not up for it just now. DH is no help as he drinks more than me. Any good books or advice out there?

My general rule is that if you continue drinking when you don't want to and don't feel in control of drinking less (or not at all), it is a problem. You may not be "an alcoholic" as such, but it certainly sounds like your drinking is a problem for you. It is affecting your sleep and your weight. You report being under a lot of stress - does the drinking help reduce the stress you are feeling, given that you say you don't feel the effects of the alcohol.

If you keep refilling your glass in order to keep hanging out with your husband, there is nothing preventing you from refilling it with something other than wine. Do you feel unable to choose water over wine? If so, why?

[Anonymous]

I substituted my nightly glass of wine for "Relaxing" tea that I bought at World Market. Has definitly helped me sleep and replaced an old habit with a new one.

I'm still drinking on the weekend though. Because i like it!

[Anonymous]

My opinion is similar to a PP’s above. I think we could sit here and parse out “alcoholic” or not alcoholic who just likes wine but the point isn’t the label here. You say you want to drink less and can not stop. Call it what you want but if you really mean you want to drink less and teally can’t stop yourself, then you are not in control or taking responsibility for your decision to have more, and that is the problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel like The Naked Mind is mentioned so much on here, from the many different threads like these. I had never heard of it outside of DCUM. Is there a marketing person on here touting this??

You'll also find it mentioned quite frequently on the reddit no drinking thread. I don't think that it is a marketing person but rather that it is a good alternative to AA for people who want to cut back/abstain that works.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My opinion is similar to a PP’s above. I think we could sit here and parse out “alcoholic” or not alcoholic who just likes wine but the point isn’t the label here. You say you want to drink less and can not stop. Call it what you want but if you really mean you want to drink less and teally can’t stop yourself, then you are not in control or taking responsibility for your decision to have more, and that is the problem.

This. In your own words, you have a problem with alcohol.

[Anonymous]

If you have to ask the question OP, you definitely have a problem.

[Anonymous]

If you can't stop yourself, you have a problem.

[Anonymous]

I love drinking but don't mid-week because I'm afraid I'd get dependent on it. I drink when out with friends, out for dinner with spouse, maybe on a Fri. or Sat night hanging out watching a movie, but no more than that. Sometimes I'll go a more than a week without a drink. When I do drink, it's maybe 2 glasses of wine and every once in awhile I'll have more (I have a group I occasionally hang with and we get a bit crazy). My parents drank every night and I could see that they were dependent on their drinks so don't want the same for myself. From reading your post, I'd say you need to cut back and eliminate drinking every night.