If you loved the baby phase and hated the toddler and preschool phase

[Anonymous]

When does it get better? I have a 1.5 and a 3.5 year old and I’m hating life. The baby phase was so much easier for me, and this whiney tranyrummy phase is making me lose my mind. I wish I’d never had kids. Is there any end in sight? Do kids ever get fun/worth it again or should I just get on a strong anti-depressant and try to ride out the next 18 or so years in a medication-induced fog?

[Anonymous]

Kindergarten was when it improved for my oldest, who was a dream up until 2.5, and then incredibly difficult until she started K. The younger two haven't followed that pattern exactly, it's been more up and down, so it may not take that long. That can be a tough age combo, depending on the kids. Hang in there.

[Anonymous]

I guess it depends on the kid. I hated the baby stage but am loving the 2-4yrs stage. I only have one kid so I’m sure that has a lot to do with it too.

My cousin has kids spaced like yours and she was a total stress ball until the older one was in kindergarten. Then things seemed to mellow for her.

[Anonymous]

They do get easier. Grade school aged was the easiest for me: 5-11. I've had a few times where I wish I had never had kids. Luckily they were just phases. You need to take a break. Take a solo visit to see a friend or family member.

[Anonymous]

Depends on your kids and your personality. I enjoyed the toddler and preschool phase where they were developing opinions and figuring out how to express themselves and learning how to do just about everything. My wife hated that stage and pretty much every other one until like age 14, when she liked certain things. She's actually better with the youngest - that relationship has been going well since maybe age 10. But, it's been tough for her because she found out she really didn't enjoy having kids and one of ours has special needs, which adds another layer of issues.

[Anonymous]

I hated age 1-3. It's better at 3 now, can reason our way out of most tantrums... If that doesn't work then a nap or snack fixes it.

[Anonymous]

I have a teenager now and hated the toddler preschooler phases. Hated. From my own experience and observing friends with similarly aged children, if you are consistent with discipline, things get better around 4. If you aren’t consistent, things don’t really get better until you do and it’s way harder to get consistent the longer you wait.

[Anonymous]

Mine are 4 and 6 and it’s waaay better now. Ages 2-3 were brutal for both my kids. They still have tantrums sometimes but overall everything is easier and they’re more independent.

[Anonymous]

This was me. Only one of my three was a difficult toddler/preschooler, and then only occasionally, but I didn't have much patience for the constant questions and demands for attention, even when they were being cute. They are just so irrational at that age! I often thought they were hysterically funny, but I was always emotionally exhausted by the end of the day and looked forward to escaping to work the next. Fortunately, my DH loved this age (and found the baby stage, which I loved, to be incredibly boring), so I had a lot of opportunities to duck out when my nerves were frayed.

I felt like there was a big improvement in K, and by 1st they were all delightful. I even have loved the teen years with my older 2, pretty much without reservation. It does get so much better!

[Anonymous]

Mine are 5.5 and 3+ and it’s great. They play together all he time (fight a little) and life is just so much easier then when they were younger. Worst was probably 3 and 1 or 2.5 and 6 months. Around the time the youngest was 18 months is when things started getting so much better because they started playing together and entratain themselves

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a teenager now and hated the toddler preschooler phases. Hated. From my own experience and observing friends with similarly aged children, if you are consistent with discipline, things get better around 4. If you aren’t consistent, things don’t really get better until you do and it’s way harder to get consistent the longer you wait.

OP here. I am really prioritizing consistent boundaries and discipline and sometimes I feel like that’s all I do. Would it be easier in the moment to give in to the whines and/or tantrum? Absolutely, but then I think about how much harder that would make an already difficult situation. There’s so little joy in this phase, so I can only hope it will eventually improve before I walk into the ocean, Awakening style.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a teenager now and hated the toddler preschooler phases. Hated. From my own experience and observing friends with similarly aged children, if you are consistent with discipline, things get better around 4. If you aren’t consistent, things don’t really get better until you do and it’s way harder to get consistent the longer you wait.

OP here. I am really prioritizing consistent boundaries and discipline and sometimes I feel like that’s all I do. Would it be easier in the moment to give in to the whines and/or tantrum? Absolutely, but then I think about how much harder that would make an already difficult situation. There’s so little joy in this phase, so I can only hope it will eventually improve before I walk into the ocean, Awakening style.

Are you depressed? Do you work?

[Anonymous]

Toddler years = whiney and dramatic
Elementary years = eager to please
Puberty and teenager = whiney and dramatic

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Toddler years = whiny and dramatic
Elementary years = eager to please
Puberty and teenager = whiny and dramatic

I agree with this summary. Once they get to be 17+ I'm finding a new phase of trust and openness. They can see the light at the end of the tunnel.

[Anonymous]

I’m the opposite I hate the baby stage. I like ages 2.5+. My kids 5 and 3 and I’m loving this stage with both of them.