Anyone ever join PACE?

[Anonymous]

I’m thinking of becoming a member to form friendships with other moms having similar experiences. However I am old (43 FTM) and I’m afraid I’ll be in a group with much younger women. Anyone have experience with PACE? TIA

[Anonymous]

If you're in DC most will mid 30s or so, so in a similar life phase as you. The actual PACE meetings were awful to me, but having a group of women with babies all at the same stage to have a whatsapp chat group to ask how we're each dealing with things over the course of the first year was super helpful.

[Anonymous]

I actually really liked it. I was 33 and in the bottom half age-wise. It's fine!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m thinking of becoming a member to form friendships with other moms having similar experiences. However I am old (43 FTM) and I’m afraid I’ll be in a group with much younger women. Anyone have experience with PACE? TIA

I did. I had my child at 42. Yes, all the other moms were younger than me (most of them much younger), but they were lovely, accomplished women and I am glad to know them. We still keep in touch and see each other occasionally. At first I was a little insecure about being so much older but having a baby is a great equalizer. There's always a risk that your group won't jibe, but most people I know who did PACE were glad they did. One of my colleagues still keeps in touch with her group, and their kids have graduated college.

[Anonymous]

I never joined but I think its expensive when there is meetup.com now. You can find a group on there that suits you.

[Anonymous]

I joined PACE when we adopted my son. It was the very best thing I did during maternity leave. Our kids are all turning 2 in the next few months and we still chat and get together regularly. We talk about kid stuff but we also support each other if one of us is going through a rough spot in other areas of our lives. I looked forward to the meetings. We started getting together outside of the meetings and did stuff like Baby n Me yoga and going out to lunch while on maternity leave. We now help each other out with watching each other's kids when one of us is in a bind. We also get together in smaller groups for play dates. We also have parties for the kids. Last year after everyone had their first birthdays we did a group birthday party for all of them at Gymboree. (We rented it out) We do "mom only" brunches and dinners, too. Those started once we all started back to work. I feel like I got so lucky with the other new moms in my group. We all get along so well and really care about each other and our kids.

I can't guarantee that you will bond with your group like that but I thought it was so worth it.

[Anonymous]

^^PP here. I was 48 turning 49 a few months later when we adopted my son. I was a good 8 years older than the next oldest in the group. It is a nonissue.

[Anonymous]

Most women will probably be younger, but that shouldn't stop you from joining. In my group I was 38 and two women were older than me. I found it very helpful.

[Anonymous]

I thought it was great and always recommend it. I was the oldest mom in my group (40s), but not by that much. They ranged from 30 to later 30s. I feel like my group didn't form a super strong bond -- I think we just had a lot of really independent types. But, we do all try to get together periodically. For me, it was the best for actual maternity leave - a place to go and hear others' experiences, learn, ask questions. I would have felt much more isolated without it.

[Anonymous]

I was 34 and was by FAR the youngest mom in the group.

[Anonymous]

Best thing I ever did for myself after having the baby

[Anonymous]

New poster who would highly recommend it. What's nice is that it is a small group of 12 ladies so you do become comfortable with each other by the end of it. Plus it's a great way to force yourself to get out with baby early on during maternity leave. Seeing others do it really encourages you in feeling comfortable doing things/going places with baby. I did pace twice - with my first and with my second. It's a bit expensive but definitely worth it.

[Anonymous]

I was 39 and was the oldest in my PACE group and felt it. It very much depends on the group of women you happen to be with. The women in my group are very nice but every event after the initial meetings involves lots of alcohol and Instagram. That makes me feel old. (I have outgrown the heavy drinking and never got into Instagram.) It just depends on the personality of your group.

[Anonymous]

I was 28 and younger than the others by a good 5 years minimum, but no one cared one way or the other—I agree that babies are an equalizer. I actually liked having more mature women to advise me. They had more life experience. When I wanted to return to work, they had great advice. Many of them had built their careers pre-baby, and I was doing it in reverse. Everyone has their own insecurities, young or old, SAHM or WOHM.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Best thing I ever did for myself after having the baby

+10000