If one parent SAH or works limited hours, what is division of labor?

[Anonymous]

I’m friends with one other SAHP and another mom who works two half days a week. All of our spouses works full time out of the time with flexibility to work at home. We were talking about who does what in the house... How do you divide household and kid related tasks? We all have one or two young kids under 3, so no school or sports type activities.

[Anonymous]

My dh usually folds the laundry, and after dinner one of us cleans up, and the other does bathtime with the kids. Typically I decide which I’d prefer, and he does the other . Outside of that, I do just about everything. I WAH pt.

[Anonymous]

I SAH. We both contribute to the ongoing, day to day chores we are about half/half. I do deep cleans, make sure everything is stocked, keep everything by organized and functioning.

[Anonymous]

I SAH with our baby and my husband works about 50 hours a week and travels 50% of the time.

I do laundry, house cleaning, grocery shopping, pet care/cleanup, and about 75% of cooking. He handles taking out the trash, lawn care, and car stuff (repairs, car washes). Otherwise we do block and tackle on tasks vs baby care (one of us bathes baby while other one cleans kitchen).

One thing that works for us both is writing to do lists each weekend. It helps us get everything we need to do do out of the way more efficiently.

[Anonymous]

I SAH. DH works in big law.

I do almost everything with regard to the house, chores, etc, including yardwork etc. BUT we have enough money that I can outsource quite a bit.

DH and I are 50/50 WITH the kids, when we are both home.

[Anonymous]

I work half time from home with toddler (nanny during work hours but she doesn’t do housework). I cook all weekday meals, but toddler keeps me from other chores, so the rest of housework/bedtime routine is 50/50 with maids every two weeks for heavy cleaning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I SAH. DH works in big law.

I do almost everything with regard to the house, chores, etc, including yardwork etc. BUT we have enough money that I can outsource quite a bit.

DH and I are 50/50 WITH the kids, when we are both home.

Pretty much this. DH and I are both doctors. He works 100%, and I work 25%. Housekeeper does laundry and deep cleaning. I do the rest. He plays with the kids when he is home and joins us for family dinners.
We outsource the lawn, but he is in charge of finding an arborist, hiring the lawn service, having things winterized, etc.

I like most of it. I like cooking. I like playing with the kids and teaching them to do stuff. The weirdest thing for me is that I am 100% in charge of buying everyone’s clothes and decorating/organizing the house. I did not get that gene.

[Anonymous]

I SAH but am starting my own business (not an MLM), working mostly when my kids are asleep. We have a household chores spreadsheet - sheets changed Tuesday, vacuuming on Thursday, etc. It’s split about 50/50 but the kids are about 75/25, considering the scheduling, ordering clothes/shoes, etc.
The after bed clean up is split into zones: kitchen is one zone and toys and cleaning up the table area (crumbs, smears, etc) is the other. We trade off or choose based on what we want to do. I cook every meal but enjoy cooking, plus it’s my solo time.

[Anonymous]

I SAH. DH has a regular 9-5. I do everything around the house. Apartment living so no yard. When he is home he entertains toddler 85% of the time so that helps. I love to cook which also helps.

[Anonymous]

I work 12 hours a week and DH is usually gone by 7am and home after kids are in bed. If he gets home early he’ll do bath and put the baby to sleep. I hate it and trying to find a way to go back to work w/o being in the hole again with childcare. I’m a teacher.

[Anonymous]

SAHM - I do all the day to day housework and deep cleaning. I do all the cooking during the week and DH does a night or two on the weekend or we do it together. He does all the yard work, car maintenance, stuff like that. Takes the trash out. I manage all the other things. He does jump right in when he gets home. He always cleans up after dinner. And then we both put kids to bed. I feel like it’s a very fair approach. I still have two that are little and home all day, but when they are in school more, I’ll take on more yard work. In the summertime, yard work is a huge time sucker. I’d rather have it done so we can enjoy our weekends together.

[Anonymous]

My kids older now but when young and DH 50 hrs/wk and lots of travel and I worked approx 15hrs a week- I cooked most meals and kept track of school stuff. Parties and entertaining, buying clothes on me (DH does shoes!). Nanny was full time so I could do errands when not working if I wanted to. If not traveling DH did bed time and kitchen clean up and bulk of laundry. Had cleaners 1x a week. DH had kids most of Sunday duty. Part of reason I had full time help and Sundays off was developing own business

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I SAH. DH works in big law.

I do almost everything with regard to the house, chores, etc, including yardwork etc. BUT we have enough money that I can outsource quite a bit.

DH and I are 50/50 WITH the kids, when we are both home.

This. My DH is also biglaw and I stay home. I manage the household and do the laundry/grocieries/calendaring/meals, but we have a lawn service (mowing/weeding/mulching), maid, and don't DIY a ton of home repairs. But DH is 50/50 with the kids (or maybe a little more) when he is home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I SAH. DH works in big law.

I do almost everything with regard to the house, chores, etc, including yardwork etc. BUT we have enough money that I can outsource quite a bit.

DH and I are 50/50 WITH the kids, when we are both home.

Yes this is a good division.

My best friend was a SAHM. She told her husband she wouldn’t do chores or cook dinner while watching the kids. She wanted to pretend she was a nanny. They were divorced by the time the oldest was 3. The house was a disaster and her dh would come home, put the kids to bed and try to figure out dinner. They couldn’t afford to outsource anything.

[Anonymous]

I do what I want as a SAH when I want and eventually it gets done. My husband does yard work and house repairs but more importantly does a lot of things kid related when he gets home so to me that is the priority. I do all the shopping, we share cooking (but neither cook much and he'll pick up carryout upon demand), I do the cleaning and laundry.