You just dropped your kid off at college - what did you forget?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Fortunately I will never know as DC was responsible for packing and DC will be responsible for figuring out how to get anything they forgot!

That’s just not who we are as a family. We all depend and help each other including extended family. I’d definitely send my kid or nieces or nephew’s something they forgot. So would my sisters and brothers.

This is me, now, second PP. My parents sound exactly like the first PP. I vowed to my kids that I would always do whatever was necessary to help them, big or small.

Same here. I don’t get the whole, “they’re an adult now so don’t help” mentality. Adults help one another, including their children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Fortunately I will never know as DC was responsible for packing and DC will be responsible for figuring out how to get anything they forgot!

That’s just not who we are as a family. We all depend and help each other including extended family. I’d definitely send my kid or nieces or nephew’s something they forgot. So would my sisters and brothers.

This is me, now, second PP. My parents sound exactly like the first PP. I vowed to my kids that I would always do whatever was necessary to help them, big or small.

Same here. I don’t get the whole, “they’re an adult now so don’t help” mentality. Adults help one another, including their children.

I know right... So strange. I guess those are the ones who can't wait for their kids to get out of the house. Or maybe their kids can't wait to leave and never look back. A healthy relationship b/t parents and kids is one that resembles the normal adult relationship where you call on each other for help and support, whether it is a jar of sugar or a raincoat. Those who frown upon this new relationship obviously have trouble transitioning during this time and only know one way to move forward. Sad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Fortunately I will never know as DC was responsible for packing and DC will be responsible for figuring out how to get anything they forgot!

That’s just not who we are as a family. We all depend and help each other including extended family. I’d definitely send my kid or nieces or nephew’s something they forgot. So would my sisters and brothers.

This is me, now, second PP. My parents sound exactly like the first PP. I vowed to my kids that I would always do whatever was necessary to help them, big or small.

Same here. I don’t get the whole, “they’re an adult now so don’t help” mentality. Adults help one another, including their children.

I know right... So strange. I guess those are the ones who can't wait for their kids to get out of the house. Or maybe their kids can't wait to leave and never look back. A healthy relationship b/t parents and kids is one that resembles the normal adult relationship where you call on each other for help and support, whether it is a jar of sugar or a raincoat. Those who frown upon this new relationship obviously have trouble transitioning during this time and only know one way to move forward. Sad.

Talk about making up stories! No, those of us who aspire to our children being independent and modeling such behaviors are not ignoring needs nor are we walking away from the love in a parent/child relationship. We simply don’t jump at a child’s beck and call. With multiple kids in college now I am on several school based parent FB groups. Between this thread and the posts on the FB groups there are way too many parents who need to learn how to cut the chord and let their child fly solo. It is remarkable how many refer to a situation a child is experiencing on campus as “what we are facing,” and seeking input from other parents on how to solve the challenge for the child. Please folks, it is our kids time to soar - don’t stilt their maturation with all this coddling. Love them, celebrate their achievements, and set them free to deal with the consequence of forgetting to pack something.

There was a post earlier that hit the nail on the head. Threads like “what did your child forget at home,” should be honest on their motivation and be titled, “I miss my kid and am trying to learn how to adjust.” Now that I would respect.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Fortunately I will never know as DC was responsible for packing and DC will be responsible for figuring out how to get anything they forgot!

That’s just not who we are as a family. We all depend and help each other including extended family. I’d definitely send my kid or nieces or nephew’s something they forgot. So would my sisters and brothers.

This is me, now, second PP. My parents sound exactly like the first PP. I vowed to my kids that I would always do whatever was necessary to help them, big or small.

Same here. I don’t get the whole, “they’re an adult now so don’t help” mentality. Adults help one another, including their children.

Yup, me too. I was enjoying the thread until those "Don't Help" Debbie Downers came along. They sink all the fun parenting things!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Fortunately I will never know as DC was responsible for packing and DC will be responsible for figuring out how to get anything they forgot!

That’s just not who we are as a family. We all depend and help each other including extended family. I’d definitely send my kid or nieces or nephew’s something they forgot. So would my sisters and brothers.

This is me, now, second PP. My parents sound exactly like the first PP. I vowed to my kids that I would always do whatever was necessary to help them, big or small.

Same here. I don’t get the whole, “they’re an adult now so don’t help” mentality. Adults help one another, including their children.

I know right... So strange. I guess those are the ones who can't wait for their kids to get out of the house. Or maybe their kids can't wait to leave and never look back. A healthy relationship b/t parents and kids is one that resembles the normal adult relationship where you call on each other for help and support, whether it is a jar of sugar or a raincoat. Those who frown upon this new relationship obviously have trouble transitioning during this time and only know one way to move forward. Sad.

Talk about making up stories! No, those of us who aspire to our children being independent and modeling such behaviors are not ignoring needs nor are we walking away from the love in a parent/child relationship. We simply don’t jump at a child’s beck and call. With multiple kids in college now I am on several school based parent FB groups. Between this thread and the posts on the FB groups there are way too many parents who need to learn how to cut the chord and let their child fly solo. It is remarkable how many refer to a situation a child is experiencing on campus as “what we are facing,” and seeking input from other parents on how to solve the challenge for the child. Please folks, it is our kids time to soar - don’t stilt their maturation with all this coddling. Love them, celebrate their achievements, and set them free to deal with the consequence of forgetting to pack something.

There was a post earlier that hit the nail on the head. Threads like “what did your child forget at home,” should be honest on their motivation and be titled, “I miss my kid and am trying to learn how to adjust.” Now that I would respect.

So self righteous. Your opinion of other’s parenting style is not the topic of this thread. Go park your soapbox somewhere else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Fortunately I will never know as DC was responsible for packing and DC will be responsible for figuring out how to get anything they forgot!

That’s just not who we are as a family. We all depend and help each other including extended family. I’d definitely send my kid or nieces or nephew’s something they forgot. So would my sisters and brothers.

This is me, now, second PP. My parents sound exactly like the first PP. I vowed to my kids that I would always do whatever was necessary to help them, big or small.

Same here. I don’t get the whole, “they’re an adult now so don’t help” mentality. Adults help one another, including their children.

I know right... So strange. I guess those are the ones who can't wait for their kids to get out of the house. Or maybe their kids can't wait to leave and never look back. A healthy relationship b/t parents and kids is one that resembles the normal adult relationship where you call on each other for help and support, whether it is a jar of sugar or a raincoat. Those who frown upon this new relationship obviously have trouble transitioning during this time and only know one way to move forward. Sad.

Talk about making up stories! No, those of us who aspire to our children being independent and modeling such behaviors are not ignoring needs nor are we walking away from the love in a parent/child relationship. We simply don’t jump at a child’s beck and call. With multiple kids in college now I am on several school based parent FB groups. Between this thread and the posts on the FB groups there are way too many parents who need to learn how to cut the chord and let their child fly solo. It is remarkable how many refer to a situation a child is experiencing on campus as “what we are facing,” and seeking input from other parents on how to solve the challenge for the child. Please folks, it is our kids time to soar - don’t stilt their maturation with all this coddling. Love them, celebrate their achievements, and set them free to deal with the consequence of forgetting to pack something.

There was a post earlier that hit the nail on the head. Threads like “what did your child forget at home,” should be honest on their motivation and be titled, “I miss my kid and am trying to learn how to adjust.” Now that I would respect.

Oh goodie the “we” police is back! Thank god because I think I was beginning to forget that I am not at school, my KIDS are. Oh thank god. I do not knwo how I ever raised successful adults without you constantly harping on that choice of word.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Fortunately I will never know as DC was responsible for packing and DC will be responsible for figuring out how to get anything they forgot!

That’s just not who we are as a family. We all depend and help each other including extended family. I’d definitely send my kid or nieces or nephew’s something they forgot. So would my sisters and brothers.

This is me, now, second PP. My parents sound exactly like the first PP. I vowed to my kids that I would always do whatever was necessary to help them, big or small.

Same here. I don’t get the whole, “they’re an adult now so don’t help” mentality. Adults help one another, including their children.

I know right... So strange. I guess those are the ones who can't wait for their kids to get out of the house. Or maybe their kids can't wait to leave and never look back. A healthy relationship b/t parents and kids is one that resembles the normal adult relationship where you call on each other for help and support, whether it is a jar of sugar or a raincoat. Those who frown upon this new relationship obviously have trouble transitioning during this time and only know one way to move forward. Sad.

Talk about making up stories! No, those of us who aspire to our children being independent and modeling such behaviors are not ignoring needs nor are we walking away from the love in a parent/child relationship. We simply don’t jump at a child’s beck and call. With multiple kids in college now I am on several school based parent FB groups. Between this thread and the posts on the FB groups there are way too many parents who need to learn how to cut the chord and let their child fly solo. It is remarkable how many refer to a situation a child is experiencing on campus as “what we are facing,” and seeking input from other parents on how to solve the challenge for the child. Please folks, it is our kids time to soar - don’t stilt their maturation with all this coddling. Love them, celebrate their achievements, and set them free to deal with the consequence of forgetting to pack something.

There was a post earlier that hit the nail on the head. Threads like “what did your child forget at home,” should be honest on their motivation and be titled, “I miss my kid and am trying to learn how to adjust.” Now that I would respect.

So self righteous. Your opinion of other’s parenting style is not the topic of this thread. Go park your soapbox somewhere else.

Hey mama, that other thread asking for help on a good hook is looking for a helicopter police.

[Anonymous]

Umbrella...mirror....and target was sold out of hangers....so hangers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Umbrella...mirror....and target was sold out of hangers....so hangers.

Glad to see we are back on track.

Bathroom cleaning supplies for those in semi private suites

[Anonymous]

Cough syrup, etc. Had no idea she would literally get crazy sick first week.

[Anonymous]

A doorstop was the biggest ask. Non a/c dorm but there was a/c in the hall.

Otherwise DC is a minimalist and wanted to bring very little.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Fortunately I will never know as DC was responsible for packing and DC will be responsible for figuring out how to get anything they forgot!

i love how these people have to pop up on every thread to post something like this, or "land the helicopter"! You are just trying to make yourself feel better because you have a crappy relationship with your kid. The rest of us do not feel the least bit guilty that we do not.

NP. Just because PP’s kid is more independent than yours doesn’t say *anything* about their relationship.

But you jumping to that conclusion says a lot about you.

So independent people never forget or need minor help? Come on. I’m extremely independent as a professional and parent and DH just I teed over a file I forgot at home.

Ditto, my kids did their own packing, but I helped them think about what to buy and consider bringing since this is their first experience with college (obviously). They decided what they needed on their own and packed themselves. My DS forgot his sunglasses, bathing suit and floss and my DD forgot her make up mirror but also decided she wanted a different pair of sneakers for the 30,000 steps she was getting in walking to class.

I could have shipped all but yes (the horrors!) I drove down and met them for lunch and brought what they needed. We also went to the store and bought other things they decided they needed after having lived there for a bit. I am 100% sure someone will criticize me for going down there but I do not care LOL. Other stuff they have decided they may need, they have bought on campus or ordered from Amazon.

This made me lol. We did the same. We decided to just not tell people IRL b/c of the "horrors" of it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread is so rich - full of reflections that can certainly seem compassionate but when it comes down to it are just overindulgent. What ever happened to let them figure it out? I’m on my DC’s school’s freshman parent Facebook group and the threads there are similar to this one - parents who think they are showing love by indulging their children and then empathizing with each other under theme of what works and doesn’t work in the dorm room or what their kids forgot to pack.

Trust me, if your kids read these threads they would know exactly what they are - excuses to think about our children because we miss them. How about we embrace this for what it is and stop obsessing about all you can do for your kids. It’s just enabling so you do not feel your own emotions.

Let’s all own our discomfort of our child leaving the nest while simultaneously celebrating their independence. They are fully capable of figuring out how to replace the hangars they accidentally left at home…

OR...it can be like the student at our summer orientation when asked (in front of 1000 parents) what was most important as a student, they replied "Care about them. Ask how they are. Be involved. Let them know you are there". Why? Because she didn't have that home support and she said she almost dropped out because of it. Her message was let them know you are still there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid is now a senior and each year she brings MUCH less than the year before.

BUT, we would be lost without Amazon. Can you imagine how much time parents must have wasted in the past mailing forgotten items to kids at college?

actually - the kids just survived without them - figured it out.

This is what I was thinking! And not in a negative way, but a "Ha, that's so true!" way. This applies to life in general - we used to all get by before Amazon changed our view on life and needs.

Yes, we just waited until we went home for break and got it them. Heck, I couldn't even afford the long distance phone call home to tell them I forgot something!