Does anyone make a lot of money and not splurge?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When this b !tch gonna respond

She probably got sucked into some home improvement project.

She's probably packing for her vacation in the garage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What's your net worth?

OP here. Around 5M.

To answer some other questions, yes he does enjoy being handy and doing home improvement projects. But I also know he doesn’t want to spend the money.

OK, $5M is obviously a lot of money but relatively a small amount given your HHI, your ages, and your kids' young ages. Meaning, retirement sooner rather than later and college still to come. So maybe your DH is fearful about funding those big life events, or maybe he has goals he hasn't fully communicated to you that he feels far from achieving (e.g. retiring at 50 with a more luxurious lifestyle, paying for private undergrad and grad school, inheritance for future grandchildren). You guys need a talk, if only to be clear on your wants, needs, short-term and long-term goals. Also to reassure him that you don't want to buy $200 sweaters daily or African safaris monthly. Hack, he might have a health issue you don't know about that might cut down his working years.

[Anonymous]

What really helped me to spend more in line with our income was this. Take your after-tax income and divide it by your hourly workload. Once you realize that ski lesson = 10 min of work,, it really puts things into perspective.

Also, you’re probably 70% into your productive life span. It’s all downhill once the chronic illnesses and arthritis kick in. You might not want to take that fancy vacation then. Live your life now!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What's your net worth?

OP here. Around 5M.

To answer some other questions, yes he does enjoy being handy and doing home improvement projects. But I also know he doesn’t want to spend the money.

OK, $5M is obviously a lot of money but relatively a small amount given your HHI, your ages, and your kids' young ages. Meaning, retirement sooner rather than later and college still to come. So maybe your DH is fearful about funding those big life events, or maybe he has goals he hasn't fully communicated to you that he feels far from achieving (e.g. retiring at 50 with a more luxurious lifestyle, paying for private undergrad and grad school, inheritance for future grandchildren). You guys need a talk, if only to be clear on your wants, needs, short-term and long-term goals. Also to reassure him that you don't want to buy $200 sweaters daily or African safaris monthly. Hack, he might have a health issue you don't know about that might cut down his working years.

NP. Really, 5 million is not a lot of money for 2 40 year olds??

I’m find this surprising. Do most 40 year olds have 5 million in savings?

[grantcate]

Many people do and live by such principles. As I see it, if a person earns a lot of money, then how he spends it is his business. And if he can spend all the money he earns this month, it means he has an exciting life. For example, I can't say that I make a lot of money. Still, I manage to save money every month, and I also spend it on entertainment and vacations. Maybe I can afford to spend more money on entertainment because I've decided that all the money from my day job will live. And the money I get from my apps https://wealthofgeeks.com/win-money-online/ will go-to entertainment. So far, that's exactly what's happening.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What's your net worth?

OP here. Around 5M.

To answer some other questions, yes he does enjoy being handy and doing home improvement projects. But I also know he doesn’t want to spend the money.

OK, $5M is obviously a lot of money but relatively a small amount given your HHI, your ages, and your kids' young ages. Meaning, retirement sooner rather than later and college still to come. So maybe your DH is fearful about funding those big life events, or maybe he has goals he hasn't fully communicated to you that he feels far from achieving (e.g. retiring at 50 with a more luxurious lifestyle, paying for private undergrad and grad school, inheritance for future grandchildren). You guys need a talk, if only to be clear on your wants, needs, short-term and long-term goals. Also to reassure him that you don't want to buy $200 sweaters daily or African safaris monthly. Hack, he might have a health issue you don't know about that might cut down his working years.

NP. Really, 5 million is not a lot of money for 2 40 year olds??


Exactly. The delusion throughout this forum is real.
I’m find this surprising. Do most 40 year olds have 5 million in savings?

[Anonymous]

A private ski instructor for a preschooler, if that's what you were thinking about, is ridiculous. Not hiring a professional to do the painting on the other hand, that is ridiculously frugal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it's reasonable to spend $1000 for private ski instruction for the kids. Why not? And why not buy a nice sweater or eat out? I agree with OP that the point of having money is to enjoy it and most people earning at that level would rather spend a bit to have tedious jobs like painting or housekeeping done rather than do it themselves. OP, I'm validating you. I think your husband should lighten up. If you can't spend some money on little things now, when are you ever going to spend it?

I agree with this. You guys make a ton of money. We make half that and I am at the point Of spending to save time. Private lessons saves time. Not painting my living room gives me more time for fun things.

We have a modest house and 10 year old cars. But just hired cleaning people because I’d rather do something else with my time.

[Anonymous]

I don't think OP has come back to tell us what her contribution to their household income is, and I think that is because OP doesn't have a job. OP, if you're not contributing, then unless you are somehow seriously deprived of something (and it does not sound like you are), I don't think you get a say in how much you spend. If you were telling us that you needed a new car and DH wouldn't let you buy one, then that would be a different story, but a $1000/night a hotel vs. a $250/night hotel is not worth arguing over. A private ski instructor vs. time well spent with your children? Also not worth arguing over.

I say this as a wife who makes 3X as much as my husband and sits down and discusses all of our major expenses with him.

[Anonymous]

Life is too short to live how you’re living. YMMV

We’ve made 700k for a number of years now:

beautiful home
nice cars we drive for at least 10 years
Lots of vacations, including skiing
Cleaning people, dog walkers
Very generous with family and friends
Nice dinners out regularly
Lots of charity donations

We also:

Mow the lawn ourselves
Don’t buy $$ clothes
Book coach but often get bumped up due to airline points

We still have a high net worth and can afford to send our kids to private colleges.

[Anonymous]

OP, the answer to your question is a resounding YES, particularly in the DCUM forum. Here I learn how many people with HHI over 500K or with NW in the millions, still don't spend much. In fact shame others for their luxury cars and private schools. Have you checked the money finance forum? Gawd! People over there obsessively save and are laser-focused on amassing wealth. However OP, your husband may be on the top of the CHEAPSTAKES at DCUM. Plain and simple he is CHEAP!

Hopefully, you are able to take care of yourself and your children. Money doesn't guarantee you happiness, but gives you convenience, peace of mind and most importantly it gives you TIME! There is nothing more valuable than time doing what you love to do. I happily pay a cleaning crew, handyman, gardener, tutor, nanny, so I can spend quality time with my partner, children, friends, and extended family. I am okay paying premium/business when possible to have a better experience flying. Especially with covid flying/airports are not pleasant and if I can afford a better experience for my family, it is worth it. I also put a premium on experiences versus material items, traveling is wonderful and my partner appreciates food and wine. We do have the basics covered before indulging. We have strong equity in our homes. Our retirement and children's education plans are on track. All of this with an HHI of 200K and NW of 2M. At your NW and HHI, I can only imagine all the more amazing memories our family could have.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't think OP has come back to tell us what her contribution to their household income is, and I think that is because OP doesn't have a job. OP, if you're not contributing, then unless you are somehow seriously deprived of something (and it does not sound like you are), I don't think you get a say in how much you spend. If you were telling us that you needed a new car and DH wouldn't let you buy one, then that would be a different story, but a $1000/night a hotel vs. a $250/night hotel is not worth arguing over. A private ski instructor vs. time well spent with your children? Also not worth arguing over.

I say this as a wife who makes 3X as much as my husband and sits down and discusses all of our major expenses with him.

The bolded statement is absurd. If you're in a marriage, you both get a say in how much you spend (which might include having decided together that one person will handle it) or you don't have much of a marriage. I could be similar to what you describe in that I make 800k+ and wife is a SAHM. She absolutely has equal say (probably more say) in what we spend on cars, house, schools, clothes, vacations, everything.

Some things may not be worth arguing over, but it's not because the person who makes more money just gets to decide them and the other partner doesn't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't think OP has come back to tell us what her contribution to their household income is, and I think that is because OP doesn't have a job. OP, if you're not contributing, then unless you are somehow seriously deprived of something (and it does not sound like you are), I don't think you get a say in how much you spend. If you were telling us that you needed a new car and DH wouldn't let you buy one, then that would be a different story, but a $1000/night a hotel vs. a $250/night hotel is not worth arguing over. A private ski instructor vs. time well spent with your children? Also not worth arguing over.

I say this as a wife who makes 3X as much as my husband and sits down and discusses all of our major expenses with him.

So, according to your logic, do you get 3x more input in how you spend over your husband? Your comment is ridiculous. This isn’t 18th century England where wives are given allowances and the earners make all decisions. Get over yourself!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, your husband is cheap. This is border line mental illness. What's the point of having a $5M NW and a $800k HHI if you are going to be that miserable?
Money can't buy you happiness but it gives you options. This allows you to comfortably pick the options that make you happy.
You chose to pick the options that make you more miserable. We make much much less than you but we live better and we still save a lot.
What are you doing with your money?

Agree that your DH is cheap. Am also curious as to what you do with your money.