Why does wearing make-up equal caring about your looks? I do my hair everyday, wear perfume and dress nice (even just going to walmart), why do I need concealer when I have next to perfect skin? That seems silly. If my significant other needed make-up to date me, they can shove it up their A$$. |
If your skin is perfect then don’t use it. I said for it to be used as needed for spot treatment. But your face loses color And glow as you age. You would benefit from some lip color, maybe a dab on cheeks, and a coat of mascara. I takes 30 seconds. Why wouldn’t you want to look better? |
| I probably would. But my DH told me he prefers NO make up. And so ... I don't really wear makeup (eyeliner, yes). It is hard to get preferences out of him (long hair? short hair? I know most men prefer the long hair, why won't he just SAY it?) |
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And if your DH wanted you to cover everything but your eyes, hands, and feet, would you indulge him?
Spouses should not dictate personal appearance. |
Okay, I wrote about looking out of place without makeup. Point taken. I absolutely think that AA women look better w/o makeup. I'm white and I look like crap without it and I know many white women like me. Our under eye circles are pronounced, uneven skin is more noticeable, and our eyelashes and eyes look sleepy without mascara. We need a little mascara, blush, and a subtle lip to define our mouths. Probably not the case for you. Rock it. <3 |
Not to be crass but I’m not standing for long. |
| Frumpy lazy dc women look like fried pickles |
I’m 38 and this was the first my husband asked for this. Like I said above, he bought me makeup for my birthday and I asked him why did he get this knowing I don’t wear makeup. Then he said he wants me to start wearing it every day because he likes seeing women with makeup on. He never said this before. |
| OP this is very telling. He “likes seeing women with makeup on”. Which probably means he likes seeing one particular woman with makeup on. I’m not being fatalistic, I’m being realistic. Has his behavior changed at all aside from this? |
As a 40yo PP who never wears makeup I am trying to imagine my DH doing this (so I can imagine my reaction/response) and I just can’t imagine it. I can’t imagine him doing this. It’s weird. And it makes me think the affair-suspicious posters may have a point. It makes no sense, has to be hiding or covering for something, though not necessarily an affair. Maybe someone he cares about said something (friend, relative)? Maybe he always cared a little, but not enough to mention and now he’s decided to mention it, maybe it’s the affair explanation. I don’t know, but it’s weird and I’d find it very unsettling. I can imagine my DH having a secret preference for makeup, but not rolling it out the way you describe. I don’t know how much help the internet who doesn’t know your DH can be in this. Yeah, it’s weird. If done respectfully, I’d definitely consider it, but I’m not sure I’d consider the way your DH did it respectful. That’s really something only you can determine. |
No it hasn’t. |
| No. But he knew when he married me that I didn't wear makeup. |
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Years ago, I dated a very sedentary, type-B guy who never wanted to go anywhere on dates. He wanted to hang out at his house with his roommates, order pizza and watch TV. So I pretty much stopped making any effort with my appearance because there was no point in doing hair or makeup or putting on nice clothes to come sit on a couch with his weird roommates. Then he complained that I'd stopped "trying". I said, "hey, if we actually go somewhere, I'll dress up. If you're not putting in the effort to leave your own house, I'm not putting in the effort to look nice."
For someone willing to do stuff with me, I put on makeup and blow-dry the hair and look nice. If I'm going out with friends, I do that. |
Guess what! We don't care what you think we look like. |
I mean, I’m 39 and I’m starting to show some age. I haven’t had any skin issues whatsoever until maybe the last year or so. I could always get away with wearing no makeup and my skin still looking fresh. But now, I’m starting to get some hormonal melasma spots and I can definitely tell my skin is drier. Could it be that you’re starting to show wear and tear? I pretty much only wear makeup to work and to go out places (and it’s not a lot, but enough to even out and brighten my skin tone) and nothing most of the time I’m at home with my husband or running errands on the weekend. Perhaps he’s trying to tell you that you’re not really pulling off the no-makeup thing like you used to be able to get away with. I wouldn’t have a problem if my husband told me that; I’d appreciate his honesty. You should be able to be honest with your spouse. |