Sitter put the kids to be early. Would you be upset?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Interesting, I would think of bedtime as the time they start getting ready for bed, not the time they fall asleep. How do you guarantee being asleep by a particular time?

And for us, bedtime is the time to get into bed. So for an 8:00 bedtime, I start bedtime routine about 7:30ish depending on if it always includes a bath or not. 7:15 if it includes a bath. And then I would adjust how long we read books based on how long it took to get everything else done. And we close the book and turn out the lights as close to 8:00 as possible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They are 1 and 3. That sounds like a reasonable bedtime.

Agree with this. Maybe she remembered wrong? Maybe the kids were tired? If they went straight to sleep, I would say that they were tired and needed to go to bed. If they were awake for an hour after she put them down, I would just remind her next time (if there’s a next time) that bedtime is 8pm. But I wouldn’t make a big deal out of it if you want to keep her as a sitter.

[Anonymous]

This wouldn’t bother me at all. Maybe she thought it would take longer, maybe they seemed tired. I would be much more annoyed if she allowed them to stay up late than had them go to bed early. I think you need to relax a little bit!

[Anonymous]

8 is too late for 1yo and 3yo. She did you a favor and you should stick to that schedule. Also agree that bedtime means they should be asleep by then, not that the bedtime routine starts then.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:8 is too late for 1yo and 3yo. She did you a favor and you should stick to that schedule. Also agree that bedtime means they should be asleep by then, not that the bedtime routine starts then.

That’s ridiculous. The fact the kids got up an hour earlier doesn’t suggest they were sleep deprived. It suggests she shifted their schedule by an hour in a way the parents didn’t want. NBD, but 8 pm is a totally fine bedtime for that age range if they sleep until at least 6-7 the next morning.

[Anonymous]

I have a few questions for OP.

Bedtime is at 8:00 could mean one of two thingsa) We start the bedtime routine at 8:00 or (b) Lights out at 8:00. What is it in your house, OP? And what specifically did you tell your sitter?

Oh, also, is this a sitter that you use regularly? What has she done in the past?

Personally, when I say bedtime is at 8:00, I mean lights out at 8:00, which means we try to be upstairs between 7:00 and 7:30. If your sensors went off at 7:00, then this would be fairly normal in my house where our kids are in bed with lights out at 8:00. When we have sitters, I usually say -- "We try have the kids in bed by 7:45 or 8:00, so if you want to try to get them upstairs around 7:15 or so to get their teeth brushed and read them a few books, that would be great." And if the sitter goes up a little early or a little late, then that's fine, whatever...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:8 is too late for 1yo and 3yo. She did you a favor and you should stick to that schedule. Also agree that bedtime means they should be asleep by then, not that the bedtime routine starts then.

Dude, you have no idea what time the kids wake up and what their nap situation is like. My 3 year old is in bed by 8:00 but doesn't actually fall asleep until 9:00 usually. She wakes up on her own around 7:00 and takes a 1.5 - 2 hour nap in the afternoon.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a few questions for OP.

Bedtime is at 8:00 could mean one of two thingsa) We start the bedtime routine at 8:00 or (b) Lights out at 8:00. What is it in your house, OP? And what specifically did you tell your sitter?

Oh, also, is this a sitter that you use regularly? What has she done in the past?

Personally, when I say bedtime is at 8:00, I mean lights out at 8:00, which means we try to be upstairs between 7:00 and 7:30. If your sensors went off at 7:00, then this would be fairly normal in my house where our kids are in bed with lights out at 8:00. When we have sitters, I usually say -- "We try have the kids in bed by 7:45 or 8:00, so if you want to try to get them upstairs around 7:15 or so to get their teeth brushed and read them a few books, that would be great." And if the sitter goes up a little early or a little late, then that's fine, whatever...

In my house "bedtime" = the time you get into bed. So if you start the bedtime routine at 7.15 (put on PJs, brush teeth), then get into bed at 7.30, then read books until lights out at 8.00, "bedtime" is 7.30. So OP -- clearly there are fairly different understandings of what is meant by "bedtime".

(Also, fwiw, I've never once asked a sitter what time the kids went to sleep. If they are asleep when I get home, and reasonably themselves the next day, we are all good. I can't imagine having cameras on someone all the time, it seems a bit much.)

[Anonymous]

This would only be one small factor I’d consider when deciding to hire her again. If this is part of a pattern of lazy behavior on her part then no, I wouldn’t. If she is otherwise great with the kids, I would. Since you’re watching her on camera, you should have a sense of the bigger picture.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a few questions for OP.

Bedtime is at 8:00 could mean one of two thingsa) We start the bedtime routine at 8:00 or (b) Lights out at 8:00. What is it in your house, OP? And what specifically did you tell your sitter?

Oh, also, is this a sitter that you use regularly? What has she done in the past?

Personally, when I say bedtime is at 8:00, I mean lights out at 8:00, which means we try to be upstairs between 7:00 and 7:30. If your sensors went off at 7:00, then this would be fairly normal in my house where our kids are in bed with lights out at 8:00. When we have sitters, I usually say -- "We try have the kids in bed by 7:45 or 8:00, so if you want to try to get them upstairs around 7:15 or so to get their teeth brushed and read them a few books, that would be great." And if the sitter goes up a little early or a little late, then that's fine, whatever...

OP was gone five months ago. THis is an old thread.