Send late August birthday boy to school?

[Anonymous]

All three of my kids are summer birthdays. My two girls are late summer and my son is earlier summer. They all went when they turned 5 and I have no regrets.

My dd2 sounds kind of like your son. She did not know her sounds and letters when it was time to decide. But I knew she was a very smart kid anyway. Just wasn't interested yet. I consulted with one of the kindergarten teachers at our school. She pointed out that we could try it and if we figure out after a few weeks or months that it was a bad idea, we could pull her. This made all the difference and I felt better about enrolling her. She is now in HS and has always been a straight A student. I can't imagine how bored and unchallenged she would be if we had waited.

With dd1, we sent her because we didn't know it was even an option not to. Lol. Since she was our first, we just thought that if you make the cut off, you go to school. We didn't know that red shirting was a thing. We also didn't know that most kids already know their letters and sounds going into K. We thought that's what K was for. Her preschool followed the high scope curriculum, so academics wasn't their focus either. She caught up quickly and is also a very good student.

DS is extremely smart but not the most motivated student. Even being the youngest, I think he is bored. He puts in just enough effort to keep straight As, but he doesn't usually do his best. He is in 6th grade and this has always been a concern of mine. Someday school will become more challenging for him and I fear that he won't know how to work hard and ask for help when needed. These issues would have been even worse if he was the oldest in his class.

Most teachers will tell you to wait because they love having older kids in class. It generally improves their test scores.

All that said, my kids do seem a little behind socially. They are shy kids anyway, but they do seem a year behind their peers socially. Especially my girls. In some ways, that's not a bad thing. It postpones dating and 'going out' until they are further into HS.

PS - DD2's preschool teacher told me to get Leapfrog Letter Factory to teach her letters and sounds and promised that it would help her learn them in no time. I bought the DVD and after watching it a couple of times, she had learned all of them. It is a miracle worker. Now they are available on youtube.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

All that said, my kids do seem a little behind socially. They are shy kids anyway, but they do seem a year behind their peers socially. Especially my girls. In some ways, that's not a bad thing. It postpones dating and 'going out' until they are further into HS.

NP here. See this is a red flag to me. My son is an Aug birthday and we started him on time. K and first grade was fine. He has speech articulation issues and is smaller physically than many peers. However, he really enjoys school learning and we figured, as you did, let's just go forward and if we have to repeat, so be it. We went against PreK advice here to move forward on time. After first grade, he was miserable and ASKED US to repeat which we did. Last year was repeat year and he did well. A bit on the boring side perhaps but all in all, it was smooth. This year, he is rocking it. Socially, he is so much happier and as an very sensitive kid, has really benefited from being oldest. Well liked by all and the teachers adore him, he's almost 2 grades above in reading and TAG math doing more than multiplication tables already - his teachers are able to give him accelerated work knowing he's ready. Academically, we don't do much except we've always from birth read to both our kids. Our daughter is K with Dec birthday and reading first grade level. My point is, the teachers are able to give the appropriate level of work to the kids. But the more important factor to me is socially, whether my kid feels confident, is going to have that ability to develop sense of self.

I was the youngest in my class with a Nov birthday in Chicago and although everything was fine, good student, etc. through school years, it really hurt me in college. I love being youngest of all my friends but I believe I would have turned out a happier vacation in vocation, self awareness and emotional intelligence had I had extra year. I felt rushed into everything in making decisions in education matters starting from HS jr year I feel.

I think social is as important if not more than academics. Just want to let people know that if your kid is above grade level, any school/teacher worth their salt will be able to adjust curriculum as appropriate for them.

FWIW, I am a strong believer of nature v. nurture but in my experience, the placement of a grade can impact the path you choose in life because time changes so much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

All that said, my kids do seem a little behind socially. They are shy kids anyway, but they do seem a year behind their peers socially. Especially my girls. In some ways, that's not a bad thing. It postpones dating and 'going out' until they are further into HS.

NP here. See this is a red flag to me. My son is an Aug birthday and we started him on time. K and first grade was fine. He has speech articulation issues and is smaller physically than many peers. However, he really enjoys school learning and we figured, as you did, let's just go forward and if we have to repeat, so be it. We went against PreK advice here to move forward on time. After first grade, he was miserable and ASKED US to repeat which we did. Last year was repeat year and he did well. A bit on the boring side perhaps but all in all, it was smooth. This year, he is rocking it. Socially, he is so much happier and as an very sensitive kid, has really benefited from being oldest. Well liked by all and the teachers adore him, he's almost 2 grades above in reading and TAG math doing more than multiplication tables already - his teachers are able to give him accelerated work knowing he's ready. Academically, we don't do much except we've always from birth read to both our kids. Our daughter is K with Dec birthday and reading first grade level. My point is, the teachers are able to give the appropriate level of work to the kids. But the more important factor to me is socially, whether my kid feels confident, is going to have that ability to develop sense of self.

I was the youngest in my class with a Nov birthday in Chicago and although everything was fine, good student, etc. through school years, it really hurt me in college. I love being youngest of all my friends but I believe I would have turned out a happier vacation in vocation, self awareness and emotional intelligence had I had extra year. I felt rushed into everything in making decisions in education matters starting from HS jr year I feel.

I think social is as important if not more than academics. Just want to let people know that if your kid is above grade level, any school/teacher worth their salt will be able to adjust curriculum as appropriate for them.

FWIW, I am a strong believer of nature v. nurture but in my experience, the placement of a grade can impact the path you choose in life because time changes so much.

You are making false statements. Your child based on age should be a year ahead and you held him back. So, he is not two grade levels ahead, he is one. He should be in the grade level above. Many schools do not differentiate. Ours does not.

[Anonymous]

You are making false statements. Your child based on age should be a year ahead and you held him back. So, he is not two grade levels ahead, he is one. He should be in the grade level above. Many schools do not differentiate. Ours does not.

You are mistaken. The PP made a valid argument and presented real facts.

As for your school that does not differentiate--I suspect that you mean it does not track classes.

All teachers differentiate. Do you really think there are no other kids who are two years above grade level in the class? There are likely some that are below grade level, as well. Unless the teacher does all instruction to the whole group--and, as a former teacher, I find that highly unlikely--the teacher differentiates.

Differentiating is done by every teacher, every day. You need to look up the definition.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

You are making false statements. Your child based on age should be a year ahead and you held him back. So, he is not two grade levels ahead, he is one. He should be in the grade level above. Many schools do not differentiate. Ours does not.

You are mistaken. The PP made a valid argument and presented real facts.

As for your school that does not differentiate--I suspect that you mean it does not track classes.

All teachers differentiate. Do you really think there are no other kids who are two years above grade level in the class? There are likely some that are below grade level, as well. Unless the teacher does all instruction to the whole group--and, as a former teacher, I find that highly unlikely--the teacher differentiates.

Differentiating is done by every teacher, every day. You need to look up the definition.

It is well documented here by teachers that they do not have the time to differentiate much. They have time for whole group instruction and some remedial small group instruction and the rest is hit or miss in a large class of varying abilities. Some weeks there is more time, some weeks less, and sometimes they are able to give work for students to do on their own. It is a mistake though to think that all teachers can differentiate every for every class. There are countless studies and claims on this forum that speak to this. Stop expecting the teachers to do so much. They didn't have the time to differentiate when you were growing up and they don't have the time to do that now. That's why there was tracking.

[Anonymous]

Based on your description, I would send him. He sounds a lot like my son was. I sent him on time. Your son will learn a lot between now and the fall so I wouldn’t worry there. My son was a late reader but caught up by mid-1st. As long as he is socially mature, he should be ok. My son is now a confident 8th grader who earned straight As on his last report card and has lots of friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

You are making false statements. Your child based on age should be a year ahead and you held him back. So, he is not two grade levels ahead, he is one. He should be in the grade level above. Many schools do not differentiate. Ours does not.

You are mistaken. The PP made a valid argument and presented real facts.

As for your school that does not differentiate--I suspect that you mean it does not track classes.

All teachers differentiate. Do you really think there are no other kids who are two years above grade level in the class? There are likely some that are below grade level, as well. Unless the teacher does all instruction to the whole group--and, as a former teacher, I find that highly unlikely--the teacher differentiates.

Differentiating is done by every teacher, every day. You need to look up the definition.

No, it isn't. But, keep telling yourself as a justification of holding your kid back. Kids should be in the proper grade. Not held back and teachers expected to provide more. Ours have a few reading and math groups but no true differentiation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Early reading isn't indicative of much in the sense of future education success. In countries lauded for education (such as Finland) kids don't begin reading until they're 7.

When I go my doctor, I don't ask him/her what age they started reading. 4,5,6... Doesn't matter much.

WRONG.

Early reading is tied in with greater intelligence and greater longer term academic success
https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2014/07/140724094209.htm

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Early reading isn't indicative of much in the sense of future education success. In countries lauded for education (such as Finland) kids don't begin reading until they're 7.

When I go my doctor, I don't ask him/her what age they started reading. 4,5,6... Doesn't matter much.

WRONG.

Early reading is tied in with greater intelligence and greater longer term academic success
https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2014/07/140724094209.htm

Did you actually read the article you linked to? The study summary says “might”. It’s also looking at differences before age 7 but not necessarily at 4.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Early reading isn't indicative of much in the sense of future education success. In countries lauded for education (such as Finland) kids don't begin reading until they're 7.

When I go my doctor, I don't ask him/her what age they started reading. 4,5,6... Doesn't matter much.

WRONG.

Early reading is tied in with greater intelligence and greater longer term academic success
https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2014/07/140724094209.htm

Did you actually read the article you linked to? The study summary says “might”. It’s also looking at differences before age 7 but not necessarily at 4.

I've repeated this many times: a child who has a rich background and no learning disabilities will quickly learn to read at 6. I taught First grade and K. The kids who had been "taught" to read earlier did not necessarily continue to be ahead of the other students. They frequently would plateau. It is far more important that the kids have a rich vocabulary and an understanding of the world around them than to spend time learning letters and sounds at three. It is very sad to have a child come to school "reading," and, yet, not be able to answer one question about what he just "read."

And, there is a difference between a child who picks up reading early and one who is drilled. Yes, kids who naturally read early continue to be ahead of the group--but those who are pushed into reading usually slow down. If you are spending thirty minutes a day teaching your three year old the alphabet, you are wasting time. You should be playing with him, talking to him, and reading TO him. Reading an alphabet book to him and exposing him to letters is fine--but, do not make that your focus.

[Anonymous]

a different perspective.

i'm an adult but when i started school i was supposed to repeat kindergarten b/c of my birthday. my mother pushed for me to start 1st b/c she thought i was ready. this was in the 90s so i think it was more lax, but they eventually let me into first grade b/c i could read the word they put in front of me (this wasn't a formal test, just the school registrar putting a word in front of me).

anyway i've been one of the youngest if not the youngest in my classes from k-12. even among my college suitemates i was the youngest. the age issues matters SO, VERY, VERY little if your kid is developmentally on target.

i have an august child and he will be up to a year younger than other kids. unless i feel strongly about this maturity i will send him. i will say that physically he is tall (taller than some of his friends who are 6 months older) and since i was often the tallest person of my gender in class i forsee his height having a similar impact on him as it did on me: people assumed i was 2-3 years older than i was up until high school when height became less of an indication of age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:a different perspective.

i'm an adult but when i started school i was supposed to repeat kindergarten b/c of my birthday. my mother pushed for me to start 1st b/c she thought i was ready. this was in the 90s so i think it was more lax, but they eventually let me into first grade b/c i could read the word they put in front of me (this wasn't a formal test, just the school registrar putting a word in front of me).

anyway i've been one of the youngest if not the youngest in my classes from k-12. even among my college suitemates i was the youngest. the age issues matters SO, VERY, VERY little if your kid is developmentally on target.

i have an august child and he will be up to a year younger than other kids. unless i feel strongly about this maturity i will send him. i will say that physically he is tall (taller than some of his friends who are 6 months older) and since i was often the tallest person of my gender in class i forsee his height having a similar impact on him as it did on me: people assumed i was 2-3 years older than i was up until high school when height became less of an indication of age.

Anecdotes are just that, anecdotes. I was always the youngest in my class (October birthday) and HATED it. I sent my August boy at 6 and am so glad we waited.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:a different perspective.

i'm an adult but when i started school i was supposed to repeat kindergarten b/c of my birthday. my mother pushed for me to start 1st b/c she thought i was ready. this was in the 90s so i think it was more lax, but they eventually let me into first grade b/c i could read the word they put in front of me (this wasn't a formal test, just the school registrar putting a word in front of me).

anyway i've been one of the youngest if not the youngest in my classes from k-12. even among my college suitemates i was the youngest. the age issues matters SO, VERY, VERY little if your kid is developmentally on target.

i have an august child and he will be up to a year younger than other kids. unless i feel strongly about this maturity i will send him. i will say that physically he is tall (taller than some of his friends who are 6 months older) and since i was often the tallest person of my gender in class i forsee his height having a similar impact on him as it did on me: people assumed i was 2-3 years older than i was up until high school when height became less of an indication of age.

Anecdotes are just that, anecdotes. I was always the youngest in my class (October birthday) and HATED it. I sent my August boy at 6 and am so glad we waited.

Agree, anecdotes are meaningless. But while we're at it, I had an October bday and sailed through school, including college, and now have a Ph.D. I never even thought about being the youngest before hearing about redshirting in recent years. Sent my Sept. bday kid on time, so she's also one of the youngest in her class, and is doing well.

[Anonymous]

This is 100% anecdotal, but anyway. Our daughter is an October birthday and skipped kindergarten in public school,
So she is full year younger than some of the kids in her class. She applied to go to private middle school (6th) this year. We live in Baltimore, where almost EVERYONE in private does a “pre-first” year. But all the schools she applied to accepted her, some with significant merit aid (we don’t need FA).

The two youngest kids in her public school 5th grade class (my daughter and another kid) are both matriculating into a very well-regarded and academically challenging private school where almost every lower school kid does a pre-first year. If the school truly believed in the “extra year” philosophy, why would they admit my daughter and her classmate? Why wouldn’t they insist that they redo 5th grade?

I think it is easier to convince lower school parents to pay for an extra year, but it’s a much harder sell when kids are older and have established academic records and personalities.

[Anonymous]

Be wary of the anecdata of people or people’s kids who are now in high school, college, or beyond. K is the new 1st grade and kids are more socially advanced earlier nowadays. Plus, as more kids are held back, it skews the cohort ever-so-slightly older.