Toddlers and preschoolers using bottles and pacifiers?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am one of the PPs who agree that toddlers (not babies anymore) should be expected, when physically capable, to progress from baby items (paci/bottle) to toddlers items (sippy cups!). To the pp who sucked her thumb due to abuse - I am truly sorry for what you had to endure, but that is not the case for everyone. I agree that there may be extenuating circumstances for some, but not all. Especially, when you know the parents and see their interactions with their children. The older the DC gets, the harder it is to transition from baby items. To pp, who wishes ill-will on parents with my opinion, nice, very nice. I feel that you created your own struggles by letting your DC use a paci/bottle for so long (again barring extenuating circumstances).

I'm sorry, but you can't tell me that if you either slowly take away a paci or just take them all away at once that your DC won't survive. There are ways of teaching your DC other, more age appropriate, soothing techniques. If you take a paci away between 6-9m, the DC can't really argue with as would a 3-4 yo! So gimme a break!!

As far as a bottle goes, again there may some certain circumstances (severe allergies, etc), but the majority of toddlers can physically use a sippy, so just take the bottles away and don't give in (unless it creates a medical issue of course - but again I have to imagine that's rare).

I cuddle my DD, but won't coddle. Even though it wasn't mentioned in the OP, others have thrown in potty training. To me, it is a little different b/c that depends on the physical ability for a DC to recognize/control bodily functions. (MOST toddlers can physically drink from a sippy cup by 1). But, I do think PT can be done sooner than most think. We've been sitting DD on the big potty since about 11 months (in random spurts) when we thought we might catch her "going". We were NOT intending to PT that early, but just thought this might avoid the "DC is scared of the potty" syndrome. Our DD has no issues with going on the potty, so all we are working on now is recognizing when she has to go and telling us. We are going #1, but workign on telling us about #2 before she goes.

I do not think I know everything about parenting (far from it), but even my DD (at 24 months) looks at her cousin funny when he has a paci and is 9m older than her. He tries to talk to her and she tries to pull the paci out of his mouth.

And, I know I will get totally flamed for this, but for the pp who mentioned nursing a toddler, I do feel a little uncomfortable seeing you nurse in public (and I nursed/pumped until DD was 1yr anywhere I went and never hid- very pro-BFing). But in this country when a child (not baby) can walk up to the mom and ask for it (and use a sippy cup), it seems inappropriate.

I really don't know why you think anyone cares about your opinion. People are going to do what they are going to do and frankly it's none of your business unless they are doing it to your child.

[Anonymous]

I can tell from the first page of responses that this is a nasty and judgmental post....but I will still respond to hopefully provide some perspective.

We were very anti-pacifier until our daughter was born. She was colicky and had a hard time soothing herself - she finally took a pacifier around 2 months and it was a godsend. Our pediatrician advised us to ditch it (and the bottle) around a year but we were moving at the time (overseas, no less) so we decided to wait a bit for the transition.

The bottle we were done with around 15 months, and it wasn't a problem. The pacifier she was whole-heartedly addicted to (she was rare in that she only used it during the day and for naptime but never for nighttime sleeping) but ended up quitting herself at 22 months (thank God, or else she'd probably still be attached to it!)

We're currently living in Europe, where pacifier and bottle use is common much later than in the US. A lot of the children in our playgroup still drank from bottles until age 2 and it is common to see 3 and 4 year olds with pacifiers here. It doesn't seem to have the stigma it has in the US.

I would just remind people that parents are entitled to make their own choices about how to raise their children, and even if you don't agree with them you don't always have to point your finger and get worked up about every single thing. I can't stand it when people make snarky judgments about others without having any background information whatsoever.

[Anonymous]

A story for 2/25, 17:07, mom of finger-sucker... My 3.5 DD also sucked two fingers since she was just a few months old, and I was convinced she'd still be sucking them at college orientation. But a few weeks ago, DD and the nanny were hanging out, being silly, and DD waved her fingers in the nanny's face. The nanny joked, "Eww, your fingers are stinky because you suck them!" Well, DD doesn't like to be stinky or messy, so she said, "I'm not going to suck my fingers anymore." And she stopped right then and hasn't done it since! I'm still amazed (and boy will the dentist be happy). I hope this little story gives you encouragement that your child may decide to stop the finger-sucking soon in a way you never expected. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

I could be smug and say my daughter never used a paci, but it's not because I wouldn't allow it. Believe me, there were nights early on when I wished she'd take one to fall asleep. But she does suck on her bunny's ears. It's disgusting, but that's her soothing tactic. OP, if you saw my 14 month old sucking her her stuffed animal's ears at the mall, would you post about that, too?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A story for 2/25, 17:07, mom of finger-sucker... My 3.5 DD also sucked two fingers since she was just a few months old, and I was convinced she'd still be sucking them at college orientation. But a few weeks ago, DD and the nanny were hanging out, being silly, and DD waved her fingers in the nanny's face. The nanny joked, "Eww, your fingers are stinky because you suck them!" Well, DD doesn't like to be stinky or messy, so she said, "I'm not going to suck my fingers anymore." And she stopped right then and hasn't done it since! I'm still amazed (and boy will the dentist be happy). I hope this little story gives you encouragement that your child may decide to stop the finger-sucking soon in a way you never expected. Good luck!

Thanks PP, that was a great story and now I am hopeful.

[Anonymous]

I'm not the OP, but I would think that it was gross that your DD was sucking on bunny's ears. It's different if it were an appropriate teething object, but I assume you are talking about a stuffed animal of sorts. Doesn't seem hygenic either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not the OP, but I would think that it was gross that your DD was sucking on bunny's ears. It's different if it were an appropriate teething object, but I assume you are talking about a stuffed animal of sorts. Doesn't seem hygenic either.

This person could not possibly be a mother.

[Anonymous]

to pp - Yes, I am the mother of a 2yo DD. I am not extremely rigid or strict with DD, but we don't let her suck on material objects. If she is having teething problems we give her suitable teethers. Otherwise, I don't see why a 2 yo would suck on a material object. I would imagine it would get quite dirty and unhealthy to suck on. I am not judging, but pp asked for opinion and I am just giving mine.

[Anonymous]

14 months, not 2. That's a huge difference in terms of mouthing objects.

[Anonymous]

I still didn't let her suck on material objects at 14 months. There are plenty of chewy toys that can be properly sanitized between uses. A dirty stuffed animal just seems kinda gross to me. To each his own, but just my opinion.

[Anonymous]

A "material object" is any physical thing. I'm not sure how you could suck on anything that was immaterial or otherwise abstract. Do you mean "fabric objects"?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A "material object" is any physical thing. I'm not sure how you could suck on anything that was immaterial or otherwise abstract. Do you mean "fabric objects"?

Are you kidding? No, I really meant an immaterial object! Some may not agree with my opinion, but post like these are really petty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A "material object" is any physical thing. I'm not sure how you could suck on anything that was immaterial or otherwise abstract. Do you mean "fabric objects"?

Are you kidding? No, I really meant an immaterial object! Some may not agree with my opinion, but post like these are really petty.

Do you know what an "immaterial object" is? It's something that doesn't exist. You know a "chewy" object is a "material" object, right? Lots of people allow babies to suck on cold washclothes when teething. Lots of babies suck on everything they can get their hands on when teething. A babies own hands are not "hygenic" most of the time, but they're constantly in their mouths. But I think the lesson of this thread is, why do you care what others do? Especially for something as petty as what you let your babies suck on (within reason, obviously - no one is talking about sucking on nails).

[Anonymous]

I don't really care, until I have to explain to my 2 yo why she can't understand "Johnny" because he is 3 and trying to talk with a stupid pacifier in his mouth b/c mommy/daddy are too lazy to take it away. That's my opinion and I have a right to express it just as much as you have a right to express yours. The OP brought up the subject and asked if others agreed. I agree - it looks ridiculous. If you don't like my opinion than don't read this post. Why do you care so much about what I think? I did several things with my newborn that were against the "norm" and took a lot of heat from my DH's coworkers (mostly teachers) and you know what - I made the right decision for my family and was confident in my decisions. I stood by them and they worked out for us. I did not get worked up or upset by their opinions. Why are you so upset with mine on this subject? We all have a right to our opinions and I will continue to have the same reaction to your 3 yr old with a paci/bottle that I have always had - before and after kids. I'm sorry you don't like it, but too bad. If you are looking for validation that it's best to take the easy road and give in to your toddler's every whim you are not going to get it from me. It's much harder to be consistent in the setting and enforcing boundries with a toddler than to give them what they want just to keep them from whining. Give your kids more credit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A "material object" is any physical thing. I'm not sure how you could suck on anything that was immaterial or otherwise abstract. Do you mean "fabric objects"?

Are you kidding? No, I really meant an immaterial object! Some may not agree with my opinion, but post like these are really petty.

Do you know what an "immaterial object" is? It's something that doesn't exist. You know a "chewy" object is a "material" object, right? Lots of people allow babies to suck on cold washclothes when teething. Lots of babies suck on everything they can get their hands on when teething. A babies own hands are not "hygenic" most of the time, but they're constantly in their mouths. But I think the lesson of this thread is, why do you care what others do? Especially for something as petty as what you let your babies suck on (within reason, obviously - no one is talking about sucking on nails).

PP here - and to answer your other questions. Yes, I know what an immaterial object is - I'm an engineer, but was trying to express the fact that pp was talking about a "fabric" object - sorry for not making choosing the most proper word, long day at work and I was trying to make a point and stick to the OP! Also, you ask why do I care about what other let babies suck on - read the OP - we are not talking about babies we are talking about 3 & 4 yr olds!!!