Quitting While on Maternity Leave?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I haven't read all the responses, but I did it when I had my first. I was on STD, then quit while on leave. Thing is, over the past few years they've asked me to come back several times. Now that my child is in school I accepted a flexible position where I can work my own hours from home full-time. So it obviously didn't burn my bridge.

Stay in touch with your friends at work and when you're ready to go back, let them know and you may find yourself in the same position as me

Exact same experience here. I have been out of the workforce for 9 years and just last week my old boss asked me to come back and work from him ~ 100% work from home position (I was in finance/sales). I averaged 160K in my position. I took my 13 week paid leave and did not come back. I was open and upfront that I did not think that I was going to be returning to work, though I wasn't sure ~ what if I hated being home? What if the baby had colic and I was miserable and couldn't wait to get back to an office? What if my husband lost his job during that time? I helped train the person who was taking over my accounts and even took a few conference calls during my leave. I had the worlds easiest baby and loved being home and did not return. My position was guaranteed for a year so if I changed my mind I was welcomed back. I earned that leave and that pay with my 7 years of loyal service and high earnings for the company (they are a major bank). They owed me my 13 weeks paid maternity leave as it was one reason I accepted the position. Nothing unfair about any of it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Of course op can do whatever she wants. But people are delusional if they think there are no repercussions when woman take paid leave and then don't return, fed or not. I've seen it happen a few times and bridges are always burned, It also negatively affects willingness to invest in other women because supervisors worry they will leave as well.

op, if you are not sure, go back for a few months and see how you fee.

Are you people nuts? When a woman doesn't come back from maternity leave, 99% of the time she has to pay back 100% of any maternity pay she got from her employer. Get over it.

Maybe, but most women don't get paid maternity leave. Federal employees don't; they use their ordinary accrued sick and annual leave. So, nothing to pay back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It happens, but it's a shitty thing to do.

How is this shittier than quitting under other circumstances?

Because you're taking advantage of maternity leave policies that exist assuming you're coming back.

Maternity leave doesn't exist. She's taking annual leave and possibly a short term disability leave.

If companies actually had generous maternity leave then fewer women would be forced to do things like this. There's a huge difference between going back at eight weeks and going back at six months.

+1
If we could only do 6 months to a year, think of all the happy babies and moms in the workplace (and dads too, for that matter). But it's just women sniping at each other instead of supporting each other.

You should do some actual research on this. Countries that have very generous maternity leave policies have worse track records when it comes to the promotion of women in the workforce. Turns out employers don't like to hire women for responsible positions when they are likely to disappear for 6 months and then you have to give them their job back. Surprise, surprise.

Yes. I work a lot in the EU and theire are very few women with young/school age kids. It's incredible. And the women who do work have a terrible time finding childcare. Ironically, they are envious of the opportunities we have here.

[Anonymous]

ME ME ME!
Hope none of you have daughters.

Don't you know pp? The days of companies caring about their employees are over. They only care about the almighty buck and how much work they can get out of their workers. I speak from experience as knowing someone who gave their all and never took leave and yet was laid off after almost 20 years working for the same company.

Remember on your death bed, no one ever says "I wish I spent more time at the office" What they do say is "I wish I spent more time with family"

If the OP can afford a few years off to take care of her child than good for her. Yes, I do have daughters but, I am encouraging them to take jobs that are friendly to working parents. Both men and women. Hopefully, things will get better when they are in the work force.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I haven't read all the responses, but I did it when I had my first. I was on STD, then quit while on leave. Thing is, over the past few years they've asked me to come back several times. Now that my child is in school I accepted a flexible position where I can work my own hours from home full-time. So it obviously didn't burn my bridge.

Stay in touch with your friends at work and when you're ready to go back, let them know and you may find yourself in the same position as me

Exact same experience here. I have been out of the workforce for 9 years and just last week my old boss asked me to come back and work from him ~ 100% work from home position (I was in finance/sales). I averaged 160K in my position. I took my 13 week paid leave and did not come back. I was open and upfront that I did not think that I was going to be returning to work, though I wasn't sure ~ what if I hated being home? What if the baby had colic and I was miserable and couldn't wait to get back to an office? What if my husband lost his job during that time? I helped train the person who was taking over my accounts and even took a few conference calls during my leave. I had the worlds easiest baby and loved being home and did not return. My position was guaranteed for a year so if I changed my mind I was welcomed back. I earned that leave and that pay with my 7 years of loyal service and high earnings for the company (they are a major bank). They owed me my 13 weeks paid maternity leave as it was one reason I accepted the position. Nothing unfair about any of it.

I don't believe for one minute a "major bank" called you out of the blue after 9 years and told you you could WFH for 160K or even a quarter of that. Even your terminology is old - they would have emailed I'm sure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you really think her coworkers will think "better" of her if she returns then quits 2 or 3 months later? That someone will be more inclined to give her a better reference?

Yes if she comes back and works for a few months and gives reasonable notice for a replacement While she is actually working. You seem to be lacking in the common sense department. Maternity leave is premised on a return,

This is common sense: OP is on maternity leave. Her office is functioning without her. She can provide notice now or up to a month before her expected return sate that she won't be returning. Office will still be functioning. Office will have at least a month or more to find her replacement. VERSUS: OP returns, and there is a transition period in which she takes on workload. Just as the office is getting into a groove with her back (2-4 months in) she gives notice. So now her office and coworkers have to transition again.

It is common sense and rational that one transition to a new staff person is easier for the office than two (OP comes back, then leaves again a short time later).

+1. I find it way more ridiculous when people come back "half assed" for 2 months and then quit.

I quit at the end of my maternity from my biglaw job. No burned bridges, and fairly common in our industry. Most people, when a colleague is out for leave, wonder aloud whether they'll return. Pretty standard stuff. Most people are parents and get that one feelings towards working/leaving a baby are hard to anticipate before a baby is born. I wonder if a lot of the responses on here are low-wage jobs where they have more oversight by management?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you really think her coworkers will think "better" of her if she returns then quits 2 or 3 months later? That someone will be more inclined to give her a better reference?

Yes if she comes back and works for a few months and gives reasonable notice for a replacement While she is actually working. You seem to be lacking in the common sense department. Maternity leave is premised on a return,

This is common sense: OP is on maternity leave. Her office is functioning without her. She can provide notice now or up to a month before her expected return sate that she won't be returning. Office will still be functioning. Office will have at least a month or more to find her replacement. VERSUS: OP returns, and there is a transition period in which she takes on workload. Just as the office is getting into a groove with her back (2-4 months in) she gives notice. So now her office and coworkers have to transition again.

It is common sense and rational that one transition to a new staff person is easier for the office than two (OP comes back, then leaves again a short time later).

+1. I find it way more ridiculous when people come back "half assed" for 2 months and then quit.

I quit at the end of my maternity from my biglaw job. No burned bridges, and fairly common in our industry. Most people, when a colleague is out for leave, wonder aloud whether they'll return. Pretty standard stuff. Most people are parents and get that one feelings towards working/leaving a baby are hard to anticipate before a baby is born. I wonder if a lot of the responses on here are low-wage jobs where they have more oversight by management?

You are delusional. Another big law attorney, not at all standard. People who do this are black balled.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I haven't read all the responses, but I did it when I had my first. I was on STD, then quit while on leave. Thing is, over the past few years they've asked me to come back several times. Now that my child is in school I accepted a flexible position where I can work my own hours from home full-time. So it obviously didn't burn my bridge.

Stay in touch with your friends at work and when you're ready to go back, let them know and you may find yourself in the same position as me

Exact same experience here. I have been out of the workforce for 9 years and just last week my old boss asked me to come back and work from him ~ 100% work from home position (I was in finance/sales). I averaged 160K in my position. I took my 13 week paid leave and did not come back. I was open and upfront that I did not think that I was going to be returning to work, though I wasn't sure ~ what if I hated being home? What if the baby had colic and I was miserable and couldn't wait to get back to an office? What if my husband lost his job during that time? I helped train the person who was taking over my accounts and even took a few conference calls during my leave. I had the worlds easiest baby and loved being home and did not return. My position was guaranteed for a year so if I changed my mind I was welcomed back. I earned that leave and that pay with my 7 years of loyal service and high earnings for the company (they are a major bank). They owed me my 13 weeks paid maternity leave as it was one reason I accepted the position. Nothing unfair about any of it.

I don't believe for one minute a "major bank" called you out of the blue after 9 years and told you you could WFH for 160K or even a quarter of that. Even your terminology is old - they would have emailed I'm sure.

He didn't call me out of the blue. He was in town from the east coast and he and his wife came from dinner. We've stayed in touch/ played golf over the years. And I made 160 with commission- the base he offered was $90 with a 9 month guarantee as I ramped up. But that's fine if you don't believe me.

[Anonymous]

*for dinner

[Anonymous]

I'm curious, what does a sales person sell while working for a bank.

[Anonymous]

Leasing in my case. GE, Citi, Key bank- all of the big banks are in the corporate leading industry. Collateral based lending. But there are endless sales opportunities in the banking industry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
ME ME ME!
Hope none of you have daughters.

Don't you know pp? The days of companies caring about their employees are over. They only care about the almighty buck and how much work they can get out of their workers. I speak from experience as knowing someone who gave their all and never took leave and yet was laid off after almost 20 years working for the same company.

Remember on your death bed, no one ever says "I wish I spent more time at the office" What they do say is "I wish I spent more time with family"

If the OP can afford a few years off to take care of her child than good for her. Yes, I do have daughters but, I am encouraging them to take jobs that are friendly to working parents. Both men and women. Hopefully, things will get better when they are in the work force.

Except that it appears that OP has such a job, which provides her flexibility. I'd hang on to that job, for precisely that reason.

[Anonymous]

Except that it appears that OP has such a job, which provides her flexibility. I'd hang on to that job, for precisely that reason.

Yes, it appears that is what you would do. But, the op may want to do something different. It is ok to acknowledge that different people want different things even if you wouldn't chose to live that way. It is the op's life and she should get to live the life she wants even if that means "not hanging on to a job that provides flexibility". She wants to be a full time mom for now and society should support her instead of shaming her to continue working.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you really think her coworkers will think "better" of her if she returns then quits 2 or 3 months later? That someone will be more inclined to give her a better reference?

Yes if she comes back and works for a few months and gives reasonable notice for a replacement While she is actually working. You seem to be lacking in the common sense department. Maternity leave is premised on a return,

This is common sense: OP is on maternity leave. Her office is functioning without her. She can provide notice now or up to a month before her expected return sate that she won't be returning. Office will still be functioning. Office will have at least a month or more to find her replacement. VERSUS: OP returns, and there is a transition period in which she takes on workload. Just as the office is getting into a groove with her back (2-4 months in) she gives notice. So now her office and coworkers have to transition again.

It is common sense and rational that one transition to a new staff person is easier for the office than two (OP comes back, then leaves again a short time later).

+1. I find it way more ridiculous when people come back "half assed" for 2 months and then quit.

I quit at the end of my maternity from my biglaw job. No burned bridges, and fairly common in our industry. Most people, when a colleague is out for leave, wonder aloud whether they'll return. Pretty standard stuff. Most people are parents and get that one feelings towards working/leaving a baby are hard to anticipate before a baby is born. I wonder if a lot of the responses on here are low-wage jobs where they have more oversight by management?

You are delusional. Another big law attorney, not at all standard. People who do this are black balled.

People who do anything other than work 90 hour weeks and make themselves available 24 hours a day 52 weeks/year, take any sick time, attend any of their children's events, or do anything short of selling their soul to represent vile corporations are black balled. Good f'ing riddance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I haven't read all the responses, but I did it when I had my first. I was on STD, then quit while on leave. Thing is, over the past few years they've asked me to come back several times. Now that my child is in school I accepted a flexible position where I can work my own hours from home full-time. So it obviously didn't burn my bridge.

Stay in touch with your friends at work and when you're ready to go back, let them know and you may find yourself in the same position as me

Exact same experience here. I have been out of the workforce for 9 years and just last week my old boss asked me to come back and work from him ~ 100% work from home position (I was in finance/sales). I averaged 160K in my position. I took my 13 week paid leave and did not come back. I was open and upfront that I did not think that I was going to be returning to work, though I wasn't sure ~ what if I hated being home? What if the baby had colic and I was miserable and couldn't wait to get back to an office? What if my husband lost his job during that time? I helped train the person who was taking over my accounts and even took a few conference calls during my leave. I had the worlds easiest baby and loved being home and did not return. My position was guaranteed for a year so if I changed my mind I was welcomed back. I earned that leave and that pay with my 7 years of loyal service and high earnings for the company (they are a major bank). They owed me my 13 weeks paid maternity leave as it was one reason I accepted the position. Nothing unfair about any of it.

I don't believe for one minute a "major bank" called you out of the blue after 9 years and told you you could WFH for 160K or even a quarter of that. Even your terminology is old - they would have emailed I'm sure.

He didn't call me out of the blue. He was in town from the east coast and he and his wife came from dinner. We've stayed in touch/ played golf over the years. And I made 160 with commission- the base he offered was $90 with a 9 month guarantee as I ramped up. But that's fine if you don't believe me.

Yea, I don't. But that's kind of the point. These anecdotes on an anon website are pointless. Either one of us could be 400 pound fat guys posting from our parent's basements.

The data shows that these kinds of scenarios don't happen often and after a 9 year break it is very difficult (though not impossible) to come back at 90K.

(Okay mom has just made my hotpocket gotta go....)