Portmanteau last names

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP -

I don't care what people do with their names or their kids' names. But I'm not willing to put a lot of effort into figuring out names, either. If I want to invite your kid to a birthday party, and I can't figure out your or your husband's email because all the last names are different, I probably just won't invite your kid (unless a close friend). Someone will always be getting one of your names wrong. You may not care, and that's fine. Just go into this knowing that there are some drawbacks, and that of course having three last names will be more complicated.

are you saying that if a name is too tricky for you (for instance too complicated for whatever reason - maybe it's too ethnic, for instance) you are not going to invite the kid to your kid's birthday party? really?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Last week on the DoubleXX Gabfest Hannah Rosen said she regretted doing it. Her husband is David Plotz. The kids are Rosenplotz.

I'm assuming that's because the name includes -plotz. Otherwise it would be a fine name. There are certainly enough Rosen-otherthings -- Rosenbaum, Rosenberg, Rosenfeld...

[Anonymous]

OP -

I don't care what people do with their names or their kids' names. But I'm not willing to put a lot of effort into figuring out names, either. If I want to invite your kid to a birthday party, and I can't figure out your or your husband's email because all the last names are different, I probably just won't invite your kid (unless a close friend). Someone will always be getting one of your names wrong. You may not care, and that's fine. Just go into this knowing that there are some drawbacks, and that of course having three last names will be more complicated.


^^
In our public elementary school, parents' contact information is not released to other students. I do not receive a class list with emails and phone numbers, and any emails from the teacher hide all the email addresses per school policy. So, when I wanted to find the contact information for our whole class for an evite, I had to search for it. I obviously asked many parents I knew for their email addresses, but others took some digging (I literally used whitepages.com and linkedin to get some of the contact info). This is not an enormous deal, and may only impact your child periodically, but I simply can't imagine that three different last names won't create confusion sometimes, and it will be a pita during those times.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:why not just hyphenate? You won't get any questions about the last name-- it's clear what's going on. With our hyphenated last name, one is ethnic (think Lin or Lopez or Patel) and the other spouse is white so it's obvious whose name belongs to which parent. We've never had any questions or issues.

If OP had asked about hyphenated last names instead of portmanteau last names, OP would have received very similar responses. Hyphenated! So bazaar! So self-centered! So difficult! Such an imposition on other people! Your child will hate you! (Not to mention the ever-popular, "But what if your child grows up and marries somebody else with a hyphenated name? Then what will they name their children?!?!?!")

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
In our public elementary school, parents' contact information is not released to other students. I do not receive a class list with emails and phone numbers, and any emails from the teacher hide all the email addresses per school policy. So, when I wanted to find the contact information for our whole class for an evite, I had to search for it. I obviously asked many parents I knew for their email addresses, but others took some digging (I literally used whitepages.com and linkedin to get some of the contact info). This is not an enormous deal, and may only impact your child periodically, but I simply can't imagine that three different last names won't create confusion sometimes, and it will be a pita during those times.

Eh. Very many things create confusion sometimes. Practically everything, in fact. I'm pretty sure that most people will be able to figure out a family with three different last names. It happens often enough even with the standard naming conventions of the wife taking her husband's last name and the child getting the father's last name, what with divorce and re-marriage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think this whole "name your kid" craze has gotten OUT OF CONTROL.
This idea is just the ODDEST yet.
It's not all about you, parents. Quit making you kid a FREAK when choosing their name.

If you think that this idea is the ODDEST yet, then I infer that your experience with ODD (not to mention FREAKY) is quite limited.

I am the author of the original post....who is new to this area. You are correct in assuming that I do not have a great deal (if any) experience with this bazaar culture. It seems narcisstic to name your child an odd name. Do you want to set them apart from everyone else? Is your child better, thus deserving of an "original", unique name. Let your child develop their own uniqueness. Also, for the sake of the teachers out there, please include the phonetic translation in parenthesis after the name. Also, teach your child how to help people pronounce their name, how to politely correct people that keep pronouncing their name incorrectly. Also, how to explain why their parents named them that. Yea....your kid will feel like a freak....and there's a good chance others may think their odd.

OP: You put the post out there to have people opine. I did that


OP here. This is a very diverse region so that's probably why you can't pronounce every name you see. Parents pick names that have meaning to them and that often means a name from their cultures. Get over it. But also, your reasoning is completely irrelevant to my post because 1. The new last name is a current, "real" last name that many people have, 2. It's easy to pronounce for native English speakers, 3. We will happily go by the "Patil" family at school events/with their friends so we won't be making some point about how different/special they are, and 4. Plenty of PPs have responded that they either did this or have friends who have, so it's not even a unique thing to do.

Get over yourself.

OP: You put your post out there for feedback. I gave my feedback. If your post was intended to insult people that gave you feedback, you succeeded. I am insulted. It sounds like you made up your mind before you made your post.

You gave feedback that wasn't relevant to my question. I clearly explained that the name would be easy to pronounce, etc, and you said you don't like when parents give children names that are hard to pronounce. So, your response was not helpful, and also prejudiced against ethnic names that many children have, and I pointed that out. Sorry if it hurt your feelings.

You are so not sorry.
I did you a favor. There are people....lots of them....like me....that will consider your child as odd....a kid to be politely observed before being welcomed into their child's life. I don't think your idea regarding naming your child is "lovely". And...I don't think people that say your unique style of naming your child is "lovely"....really think that. It is weird. So, if you want to bring your child into this world with the burden of being "weird"....so be it. Go for it. I think it is selfish.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

You are so not sorry.
I did you a favor. There are people....lots of them....like me....that will consider your child as odd....a kid to be politely observed before being welcomed into their child's life. I don't think your idea regarding naming your child is "lovely". And...I don't think people that say your unique style of naming your child is "lovely"....really think that. It is weird. So, if you want to bring your child into this world with the burden of being "weird"....so be it. Go for it. I think it is selfish.

You would be less welcoming to a child whose last name was a combination of its parents' last names? (Assuming that you even knew this to be so.)

Oh wow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think this whole "name your kid" craze has gotten OUT OF CONTROL.
This idea is just the ODDEST yet.
It's not all about you, parents. Quit making you kid a FREAK when choosing their name.

If you think that this idea is the ODDEST yet, then I infer that your experience with ODD (not to mention FREAKY) is quite limited.

I am the author of the original post....who is new to this area. You are correct in assuming that I do not have a great deal (if any) experience with this bazaar culture. It seems narcisstic to name your child an odd name. Do you want to set them apart from everyone else? Is your child better, thus deserving of an "original", unique name. Let your child develop their own uniqueness. Also, for the sake of the teachers out there, please include the phonetic translation in parenthesis after the name. Also, teach your child how to help people pronounce their name, how to politely correct people that keep pronouncing their name incorrectly. Also, how to explain why their parents named them that. Yea....your kid will feel like a freak....and there's a good chance others may think their odd.

OP: You put the post out there to have people opine. I did that


OP here. This is a very diverse region so that's probably why you can't pronounce every name you see. Parents pick names that have meaning to them and that often means a name from their cultures. Get over it. But also, your reasoning is completely irrelevant to my post because 1. The new last name is a current, "real" last name that many people have, 2. It's easy to pronounce for native English speakers, 3. We will happily go by the "Patil" family at school events/with their friends so we won't be making some point about how different/special they are, and 4. Plenty of PPs have responded that they either did this or have friends who have, so it's not even a unique thing to do.

Get over yourself.

OP: You put your post out there for feedback. I gave my feedback. If your post was intended to insult people that gave you feedback, you succeeded. I am insulted. It sounds like you made up your mind before you made your post.

You gave feedback that wasn't relevant to my question. I clearly explained that the name would be easy to pronounce, etc, and you said you don't like when parents give children names that are hard to pronounce. So, your response was not helpful, and also prejudiced against ethnic names that many children have, and I pointed that out. Sorry if it hurt your feelings.

You are so not sorry.
I did you a favor. There are people....lots of them....like me....that will consider your child as odd....a kid to be politely observed before being welcomed into their child's life. I don't think your idea regarding naming your child is "lovely". And...I don't think people that say your unique style of naming your child is "lovely"....really think that. It is weird. So, if you want to bring your child into this world with the burden of being "weird"....so be it. Go for it. I think it is selfish.

PP, just stop talking. You will think a child is odd based on what he/she is named? You're ignorant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The prior mayor of LA, Antio Villaraigosa did this--

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Antonio_Villaraigosa#Personal_life

Personally, I'm not a fan because I wouldn't do it myself-- my last name and my spouse's last name are important to us. Our kids have a hyphenated last name. But I know there are others who don't place a ton of value on family history (no judgment) so why not create something new.

Actually, this guy did it the only way that makes sense. He and his wife changed their last names to the Potmanteau name and then gave that to their children. As in a FAMILY NAME. Like, this is the "Thomwell" family. Instead of Mr. Thompson, Mrs. Maxwell, and their son Larlo Thomwell.

I'm laughing even imagining that. It's so pretentious and dumb.

Pretentious of what, exactly?

Also, why must there be a FAMILY NAME? What is nonsensical about Larla Thompson, Larlo Maxwell, and Ava/Liam Thomwell?

Last names are FAMILY NAMES. That's what they are and have always been.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Family_name

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The prior mayor of LA, Antio Villaraigosa did this--

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Antonio_Villaraigosa#Personal_life

Personally, I'm not a fan because I wouldn't do it myself-- my last name and my spouse's last name are important to us. Our kids have a hyphenated last name. But I know there are others who don't place a ton of value on family history (no judgment) so why not create something new.

Actually, this guy did it the only way that makes sense. He and his wife changed their last names to the Potmanteau name and then gave that to their children. As in a FAMILY NAME. Like, this is the "Thomwell" family. Instead of Mr. Thompson, Mrs. Maxwell, and their son Larlo Thomwell.

I'm laughing even imagining that. It's so pretentious and dumb.

Pretentious of what, exactly?

Also, why must there be a FAMILY NAME? What is nonsensical about Larla Thompson, Larlo Maxwell, and Ava/Liam Thomwell?

OP here. I kind of thought most people would take some issue with it which is why my initial feeling was not to do it. But, since posting, I think I've decided that I don't really care if people roll their eyes at us while the child is young... more concerned about the name working for an adult, and I'm not seeing any reason it wouldn't. There are practical reasons it makes sense to have the same name as a family, but either way we will have two different last names in the family because my husband and I aren't changing ours.

OP, please please please tell us your child's first name. I would bet so much $$$ that it's something really new age and/or a traditional name spelled weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Last names are FAMILY NAMES. That's what they are and have always been.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Family_name

Did you read the entry you linked?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

OP here. I kind of thought most people would take some issue with it which is why my initial feeling was not to do it. But, since posting, I think I've decided that I don't really care if people roll their eyes at us while the child is young... more concerned about the name working for an adult, and I'm not seeing any reason it wouldn't. There are practical reasons it makes sense to have the same name as a family, but either way we will have two different last names in the family because my husband and I aren't changing ours.

OP, please please please tell us your child's first name. I would bet so much $$$ that it's something really new age and/or a traditional name spelled weird.

1. Why would you assume that?
2. So what if it is?

(I'm not the OP.)

(Also, is there even still such a thing as "new age"? It's 2015, not 1970.)

[Anonymous]

I'm confused. If the OP and her DH won't change their names, then why not just hyphenate???

Why on earth create a bizarre third last name?

This just doesn't make any sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm confused. If the OP and her DH won't change their names, then why not just hyphenate???

Why on earth create a bizarre third last name?

This just doesn't make any sense.

Please read the OP. They are not creating a bizarre third last name. They are creating a third last name that many people have as their last name.

Also, perhaps they are not hyphenating because they believe that hyphenating is a nuisance. Plus DCUM's opinion of hyphenating is basically exactly the same as DCUM's opinion of portmanteau last names -- it's weird, it's impossibly complicated, and if you are even thinking about doing it, that means that you're a selfish entitled hipster weirdo.

[Anonymous]

Hyphenation is more common than making up a new last name...and is less bizarre--especially when neither parent is willing to take the new last name.

Hyphenating isn't a nuisance. My name is hyphenated, and so are my kids. The only (rare) issue is when someone alphabetizes the last name under Jones instead of Smith (Smith-Jones).