Portmanteau last names

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Tennessee will not let you put a combined name on a birth certificate:

http://www.npr.org/2014/09/15/347954339/creating-your-baby-s-last-name-tennessee-says-no
http://attorneygeneral.tn.gov/op/2014/op14-75.pdf

I think that's a good reason to do it, right there.

Also in Tennessee, for a married couple, just the mother's last name requires agreement from the father, but just the father's last name does not seem to require agreement from the mother.

Tennessee is the worst. Definitely doing it now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The prior mayor of LA, Antio Villaraigosa did this--

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Antonio_Villaraigosa#Personal_life

Personally, I'm not a fan because I wouldn't do it myself-- my last name and my spouse's last name are important to us. Our kids have a hyphenated last name. But I know there are others who don't place a ton of value on family history (no judgment) so why not create something new.

Actually, this guy did it the only way that makes sense. He and his wife changed their last names to the Potmanteau name and then gave that to their children. As in a FAMILY NAME. Like, this is the "Thomwell" family. Instead of Mr. Thompson, Mrs. Maxwell, and their son Larlo Thomwell.

I'm laughing even imagining that. It's so pretentious and dumb.

Pretentious of what, exactly?

Also, why must there be a FAMILY NAME? What is nonsensical about Larla Thompson, Larlo Maxwell, and Ava/Liam Thomwell?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think this whole "name your kid" craze has gotten OUT OF CONTROL.
This idea is just the ODDEST yet.
It's not all about you, parents. Quit making you kid a FREAK when choosing their name.

If you think that this idea is the ODDEST yet, then I infer that your experience with ODD (not to mention FREAKY) is quite limited.

I am the author of the original post....who is new to this area. You are correct in assuming that I do not have a great deal (if any) experience with this bazaar culture. It seems narcisstic to name your child an odd name. Do you want to set them apart from everyone else? Is your child better, thus deserving of an "original", unique name. Let your child develop their own uniqueness. Also, for the sake of the teachers out there, please include the phonetic translation in parenthesis after the name. Also, teach your child how to help people pronounce their name, how to politely correct people that keep pronouncing their name incorrectly. Also, how to explain why their parents named them that. Yea....your kid will feel like a freak....and there's a good chance others may think their odd.

OP: You put the post out there to have people opine. I did that


OP here. This is a very diverse region so that's probably why you can't pronounce every name you see. Parents pick names that have meaning to them and that often means a name from their cultures. Get over it. But also, your reasoning is completely irrelevant to my post because 1. The new last name is a current, "real" last name that many people have, 2. It's easy to pronounce for native English speakers, 3. We will happily go by the "Patil" family at school events/with their friends so we won't be making some point about how different/special they are, and 4. Plenty of PPs have responded that they either did this or have friends who have, so it's not even a unique thing to do.

Get over yourself.

OP: You put your post out there for feedback. I gave my feedback. If your post was intended to insult people that gave you feedback, you succeeded. I am insulted. It sounds like you made up your mind before you made your post.

[Anonymous]

OP -

I don't care what people do with their names or their kids' names. But I'm not willing to put a lot of effort into figuring out names, either. If I want to invite your kid to a birthday party, and I can't figure out your or your husband's email because all the last names are different, I probably just won't invite your kid (unless a close friend). Someone will always be getting one of your names wrong. You may not care, and that's fine. Just go into this knowing that there are some drawbacks, and that of course having three last names will be more complicated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think this whole "name your kid" craze has gotten OUT OF CONTROL.
This idea is just the ODDEST yet.
It's not all about you, parents. Quit making you kid a FREAK when choosing their name.

If you think that this idea is the ODDEST yet, then I infer that your experience with ODD (not to mention FREAKY) is quite limited.

I am the author of the original post....who is new to this area. You are correct in assuming that I do not have a great deal (if any) experience with this bazaar culture. It seems narcisstic to name your child an odd name. Do you want to set them apart from everyone else? Is your child better, thus deserving of an "original", unique name. Let your child develop their own uniqueness. Also, for the sake of the teachers out there, please include the phonetic translation in parenthesis after the name. Also, teach your child how to help people pronounce their name, how to politely correct people that keep pronouncing their name incorrectly. Also, how to explain why their parents named them that. Yea....your kid will feel like a freak....and there's a good chance others may think their odd.

OP: You put the post out there to have people opine. I did that


OP here. This is a very diverse region so that's probably why you can't pronounce every name you see. Parents pick names that have meaning to them and that often means a name from their cultures. Get over it. But also, your reasoning is completely irrelevant to my post because 1. The new last name is a current, "real" last name that many people have, 2. It's easy to pronounce for native English speakers, 3. We will happily go by the "Patil" family at school events/with their friends so we won't be making some point about how different/special they are, and 4. Plenty of PPs have responded that they either did this or have friends who have, so it's not even a unique thing to do.

Get over yourself.

OP: You put your post out there for feedback. I gave my feedback. If your post was intended to insult people that gave you feedback, you succeeded. I am insulted. It sounds like you made up your mind before you made your post.

You gave feedback that wasn't relevant to my question. I clearly explained that the name would be easy to pronounce, etc, and you said you don't like when parents give children names that are hard to pronounce. So, your response was not helpful, and also prejudiced against ethnic names that many children have, and I pointed that out. Sorry if it hurt your feelings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP -

I don't care what people do with their names or their kids' names. But I'm not willing to put a lot of effort into figuring out names, either. If I want to invite your kid to a birthday party, and I can't figure out your or your husband's email because all the last names are different, I probably just won't invite your kid (unless a close friend). Someone will always be getting one of your names wrong. You may not care, and that's fine. Just go into this knowing that there are some drawbacks, and that of course having three last names will be more complicated.

Hmm.. good point. I supposed we could always set up an email address that is [e-mail] and have it forward. But, my current email address is not [e-mail]. Also, when you are figuring out email addresses, how do you know which domain they use, and how they have their email address structured? Do you just send the email invite to all [e-mail]? What if someone is [e-mail]? Honest question, just very curious about this and it's a point I hadn't though of.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The prior mayor of LA, Antio Villaraigosa did this--

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Antonio_Villaraigosa#Personal_life

Personally, I'm not a fan because I wouldn't do it myself-- my last name and my spouse's last name are important to us. Our kids have a hyphenated last name. But I know there are others who don't place a ton of value on family history (no judgment) so why not create something new.

Actually, this guy did it the only way that makes sense. He and his wife changed their last names to the Potmanteau name and then gave that to their children. As in a FAMILY NAME. Like, this is the "Thomwell" family. Instead of Mr. Thompson, Mrs. Maxwell, and their son Larlo Thomwell.

I'm laughing even imagining that. It's so pretentious and dumb.

Pretentious of what, exactly?

Also, why must there be a FAMILY NAME? What is nonsensical about Larla Thompson, Larlo Maxwell, and Ava/Liam Thomwell?

OP here. I kind of thought most people would take some issue with it which is why my initial feeling was not to do it. But, since posting, I think I've decided that I don't really care if people roll their eyes at us while the child is young... more concerned about the name working for an adult, and I'm not seeing any reason it wouldn't. There are practical reasons it makes sense to have the same name as a family, but either way we will have two different last names in the family because my husband and I aren't changing ours.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP -

I don't care what people do with their names or their kids' names. But I'm not willing to put a lot of effort into figuring out names, either. If I want to invite your kid to a birthday party, and I can't figure out your or your husband's email because all the last names are different, I probably just won't invite your kid (unless a close friend). Someone will always be getting one of your names wrong. You may not care, and that's fine. Just go into this knowing that there are some drawbacks, and that of course having three last names will be more complicated.

Hmm.. good point. I supposed we could always set up an email address that is [e-mail] and have it forward. But, my current email address is not [e-mail]. Also, when you are figuring out email addresses, how do you know which domain they use, and how they have their email address structured? Do you just send the email invite to all [e-mail]? What if someone is [e-mail]? Honest question, just very curious about this and it's a point I hadn't though of.

OP again. Also, with many mothers have different last names than their children, if they kept their maiden name but gave child DH's last name (which seems to be the most common choice). How would you handle finding the email in that situation? Or just not bother inviting that kid?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Hmm.. good point. I supposed we could always set up an email address that is [e-mail] and have it forward. But, my current email address is not [e-mail]. Also, when you are figuring out email addresses, how do you know which domain they use, and how they have their email address structured? Do you just send the email invite to all [e-mail]? What if someone is [e-mail]? Honest question, just very curious about this and it's a point I hadn't though of.

When I get class e-mails from school, this is how the e-mails are set up (when they're visible): Child Name <e-mail address>, Child Name 2 <e-mail address>. So it's clear which e-mail address goes with which child. The same with sign-up sheets, which would have three columns: child's name, parent's name, e-mail address. I don't think I've ever encountered a situation where I got a mass of e-mail addresses unattached to a child's name. And then, of course, plenty of people have e-mail addresses like [e-mail], or whatever. And that's not even mentioning the many mothers (I am one) whose children have the children's father's last name, not the mother's.

In short, PP's experience may be different, but I, personally, have never been in a situation where I would be able to figure out the e-mail address if the parent had the same last name as the child but would not be able to if the parent didn't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP -

I don't care what people do with their names or their kids' names. But I'm not willing to put a lot of effort into figuring out names, either. If I want to invite your kid to a birthday party, and I can't figure out your or your husband's email because all the last names are different, I probably just won't invite your kid (unless a close friend). Someone will always be getting one of your names wrong. You may not care, and that's fine. Just go into this knowing that there are some drawbacks, and that of course having three last names will be more complicated.

Hmm.. good point. I supposed we could always set up an email address that is [e-mail] and have it forward. But, my current email address is not [e-mail]. Also, when you are figuring out email addresses, how do you know which domain they use, and how they have their email address structured? Do you just send the email invite to all [e-mail]? What if someone is [e-mail]? Honest question, just very curious about this and it's a point I hadn't though of.

OP again. Also, with many mothers have different last names than their children, if they kept their maiden name but gave child DH's last name (which seems to be the most common choice). How would you handle finding the email in that situation? Or just not bother inviting that kid?

You are overthinking it OP. In schools, the parent's contact information like emails and phone numbers are listed under child's name.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
You are overthinking it OP. In schools, the parent's contact information like emails and phone numbers are listed under child's name.

Yup. So I honestly don't understand what the "I wouldn't invite your child to a birthday party" PP was referring to.

[Anonymous]

I know one person who did this 20 years ago--- parents were lefties. Parents kept their names, kids had the new name. This thread prompted me to look them up-- the kids now just have the dad's name.

Also, is "portmanteau last name" a known term? I had to google it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know one person who did this 20 years ago--- parents were lefties. Parents kept their names, kids had the new name. This thread prompted me to look them up-- the kids now just have the dad's name.

Also, is "portmanteau last name" a known term? I had to google it.

I know one person whose parents did this 25 years ago, and she still has that same combined last name. There, two anecdotes!

[Anonymous]

Last week on the DoubleXX Gabfest Hannah Rosen said she regretted doing it. Her husband is David Plotz. The kids are Rosenplotz.

[Anonymous]

why not just hyphenate? You won't get any questions about the last name-- it's clear what's going on. With our hyphenated last name, one is ethnic (think Lin or Lopez or Patel) and the other spouse is white so it's obvious whose name belongs to which parent. We've never had any questions or issues.