how old does your daughter have to be to wear a bikini?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

There is a difference between a convenient and easy tankini two piece and a string bikini. Two different things. Also, there is a difference between babies who wear two pieces and tweens who were happy with tankinis and one pieces suddenly wanting to wear bikinis. Obviously these girls didn't just suddenly decide they like the feel of water on their skin...

OK. And so...?

OMG! I just really love the way these 5 inch heels and tiny miniskirt make me feel. It has nothing to do with the attention I get from men. Why can't people understand that this is just me expressing who I am? It has nothing to do with history or society or culture or ANYTHING like that.

That's what you think an eleven-year-old girl is thinking, when she asks for a bikini? Really? The eleven-year-old wants to wear a bikini because she wants to get attention from men?

And if you find it impossible to imagine that a woman might want to wear five-inch heels and a miniskirt because she likes the way they make her feel, you might try improving your imagination skills.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mine is a rising 2nd grader and wants one. Is this early sexualization (in a bad way) or just fine?

Why do we have to do this every, effing summer? A bikini does not mean a child is "sexualized." A "bikini" implies something that is not embodied in all bikinis. Some have boy short bottoms. Some are cute and girly with frills. Some are inappropriate, yes. Stop painting with a broad brush. Talk to your daughter and take her shopping. Novel concept.

FWIW, many people like bikinis b/c htey are more comfortable. Easier to go to the bathroom. They lack all the wet, cold fabric. If I were thinner, I would be in a bikini in a heartbeat for those reasons.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

There is a difference between a convenient and easy tankini two piece and a string bikini. Two different things. Also, there is a difference between babies who wear two pieces and tweens who were happy with tankinis and one pieces suddenly wanting to wear bikinis. Obviously these girls didn't just suddenly decide they like the feel of water on their skin...

OK. And so...?

OMG! I just really love the way these 5 inch heels and tiny miniskirt make me feel. It has nothing to do with the attention I get from men. Why can't people understand that this is just me expressing who I am? It has nothing to do with history or society or culture or ANYTHING like that.

Really? You think that when my 8 year old asks for a bikini she's thinking, "I want this suit to show off my body to boys!!!"?

OK.

[Anonymous]

My wife and I took our 12-year-old granddaughter to buy a swimsuit for her 12th birthday and said she could have what she wanted. I have to add she is well developed for her age (34B). I was surprised and a bit horrified when she chose a tie-side bikini, although Grandma did not seem shocked at all. When worn is is low enough in front to form a bikini bridge whilst at the back she almost sits on the "waist"band. Although it sounds somewhat sexual, when she is wearing it she is not self-conscious at all ad just thinks of it as bathing attire, nothing to do with wanting to attract boys. I think it just goes to show that every person has a different point of view.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My wife and I took our 12-year-old granddaughter to buy a swimsuit for her 12th birthday and said she could have what she wanted. I have to add she is well developed for her age (34B). I was surprised and a bit horrified when she chose a tie-side bikini, although Grandma did not seem shocked at all. When worn is is low enough in front to form a bikini bridge whilst at the back she almost sits on the "waist"band. Although it sounds somewhat sexual, when she is wearing it she is not self-conscious at all ad just thinks of it as bathing attire, nothing to do with wanting to attract boys. I think it just goes to show that every person has a different point of view.

Troll. What grandfather knows the bra size of his 12-year-old granddaughter? What grandfather know what a "bikini bridge" is?

[Anonymous]

35

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Bottoms more likely to come off

Yes, but that's a feature, not a bug -- makes it so much easier to go to the bathroom!

+1 My DD wore a bikini/tankini from an early age. Now at 9 yrs she's super-modest so she prefers a one-piece. But, this year we found a good compromise with girl's swimshorts plus a rash-guard top.

[Anonymous]

Oh, FFS. There is nothing sexual about a 7-year-old girl's body no matter what she is wearing (or not wearing) unless she's being viewed by a pedophile, in which case it STILL doesn't matter what she is or isn't wearing.

I was sexually abused by my stepfather starting at the age of 6.5. Had he seen me in a 2 piece bathing suit? Yes. So had my father, uncles, male cousins,grandfathers, step-grandfathers, older stepbrothers, & male friends of the family, most of whom were alone with me on numerous occasions, as well.Yet none of these other men/older boys sexually abused me.Because they weren't pedophiles.

My sister was 18 months older than me & also wore a 2 piece bathing suit in front of our stepfather multiple times each summer. We looked exactly alike except she was a bit taller, tanned a bit more than I did & was slender while I was downright scrawny. If one of us looked more "attractive" in a bikini as a young girl, it was definitely her. Yet our stepfather never sexually abused her. This was almost certainly not because he looked at us in our (often identical) bikinis & thought my prepubescent body looked "sexier" than her prepubescent body but because, due to various factors completely unrelated to our bodies or swimwear choices, I was easier to "groom" & less likely to tell anyone about the abuse.

I could've danced in front of most of the adult/teenaged males in my life naked at 7 & they would have still never had sex with me or touched me in an inappropriate manner. Because they weren't pedophiles. I could've worn nothing but long sleeve shirts & pants or skirts that didn't show so much as my ankle & swam in a full body, baggy wetsuit in front of my stepfather &he still would've molested & raped me. Because he was a pedophile.

Oh, & FWIW, I saw absolutely no correlation whatsoever between when or if my various friends/ female cousins wore bikinis & the age at which they became sexually active.

[Anonymous]

My kids had to be 15 for bikinis. They were allowed to wear rankings as long as they weren't low cut and covered their abdomen.

At our pool, there are well developed Tweens in string bikinis. They are trying so hard to look and act like teens. They come off like skanks. And it is so creepy when you see lifeguards and dads checking them out. Yuck.

[Anonymous]

Can someone explain to me why it is acceptable for an 8 year old boy to show his belly button but immodest and inappropriate for an eight year old girl to do the same?

Thanks!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids had to be 15 for bikinis. They were allowed to wear rankings as long as they weren't low cut and covered their abdomen.

At our pool, there are well developed Tweens in string bikinis. They are trying so hard to look and act like teens. They come off like skanks. And it is so creepy when you see lifeguards and dads checking them out. Yuck.

You know what I think is creepy? Calling 11-year-old and 12-year-old girls "skanks".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I just asked my 6 and 9 year olds why they like wearing bikinis.
-easier to take off to use the bathroom
- more opportunity to mix and match
- they like how the sun and water feel on their bellies
- 9 yr old thinks they're more whimsical and fun - she thinks one-pieces are for hardcore swimmers doing laps

Obviously they have not yet learned to think of themselves as objects, rather than subjects. Good for you, PP! (<---sincere praise)

Would you let them go naked? Why not? Much easier to go to the bathroom. Even MORE opportunity to feel water and sun on skin. I guess it's less matchy-matchy, but other than that why not full nudity or topless?

Clearly there are some standards of what's appropriate and they are dictated by societal standards of modesty and privacy, so stop pretending that this is a value-free choice for little girls who are untainted by objectification.

You are way too uptight about this. Little girls might just also like the fashion aspect of it. They don't go naked for other activities, that's why they don't want to for swimming. Sheesh.

[Anonymous]

No bikini wearing for anyone who lives in this house, it's just not modest and puts too much emphasis on qualities that do not (IMO) help women. When my daughters are adults and support themselves and do not live here anymore, they are (obviously) welcome to dress however they please and I won't say anything to them about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids had to be 15 for bikinis. They were allowed to wear rankings as long as they weren't low cut and covered their abdomen.

At our pool, there are well developed Tweens in string bikinis. They are trying so hard to look and act like teens. They come off like skanks. And it is so creepy when you see lifeguards and dads checking them out. Yuck.

You know what I think is creepy? Calling 11-year-old and 12-year-old girls "skanks".

+1 million

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Oh, FFS. There is nothing sexual about a 7-year-old girl's body no matter what she is wearing (or not wearing) unless she's being viewed by a pedophile, in which case it STILL doesn't matter what she is or isn't wearing.

I was sexually abused by my stepfather starting at the age of 6.5. Had he seen me in a 2 piece bathing suit? Yes. So had my father, uncles, male cousins,grandfathers, step-grandfathers, older stepbrothers, & male friends of the family, most of whom were alone with me on numerous occasions, as well.Yet none of these other men/older boys sexually abused me.Because they weren't pedophiles.

My sister was 18 months older than me & also wore a 2 piece bathing suit in front of our stepfather multiple times each summer. We looked exactly alike except she was a bit taller, tanned a bit more than I did & was slender while I was downright scrawny. If one of us looked more "attractive" in a bikini as a young girl, it was definitely her. Yet our stepfather never sexually abused her. This was almost certainly not because he looked at us in our (often identical) bikinis & thought my prepubescent body looked "sexier" than her prepubescent body but because, due to various factors completely unrelated to our bodies or swimwear choices, I was easier to "groom" & less likely to tell anyone about the abuse.

I could've danced in front of most of the adult/teenaged males in my life naked at 7 & they would have still never had sex with me or touched me in an inappropriate manner. Because they weren't pedophiles. I could've worn nothing but long sleeve shirts & pants or skirts that didn't show so much as my ankle & swam in a full body, baggy wetsuit in front of my stepfather &he still would've molested & raped me. Because he was a pedophile.

Oh, & FWIW, I saw absolutely no correlation whatsoever between when or if my various friends/ female cousins wore bikinis & the age at which they became sexually active.

+1billion on this post!

I'm sorry for everything you've been through. I'm also so glad that you appear to recognize that what happened was in no way your fault, regardless of what you did or did not wear in front of your stepfather. Thanks to how traumatic what happened to you surely was in & of itself, much less coupled with living in a society that seems to, sadly, be full of victim blaming, however, I'm guessing it took you a while to get to where you are now You are a very strong woman.