Tell me about your weird co-worker(s)...

[Anonymous]

This isn't quite a colleague, but I had a foreign language professor in college who (apparently) had only three sets of clothes. A blue set (blue pants, blue shirt, blue sweater), a red set (red pants, red shirt, red sweater), and a green set (green pants, green shirt, green sweater.) And he always wore them like that, monochromatic sets, and wore each set for one week at a time (we had class five days a week.)

He was a really nice guy, but he was teaching an introductory class and he had a pretty significant lisp, even in his native language. To this day, I cannot speak or understand a word of the language.

[Anonymous]

I used to work at a place where the secretaries, with no college degrees, made $60k-$80k and had no worries about getting fired for being lazy and incompetent. And the people who actually did the work that made all the profits had degrees in difficult majors and made less than the secretaries.

When I was working as a paralegal, I made significantly more than the junior attorneys. I did have a Bachelor's Degree, but not a J.D. I could tell hundreds of unusual coworker stories about that job. But they are so unusual that they would absolutely identify the source. And I may need them as a reference.

[Anonymous]

There's the lady in my office who carries her purse everywhere, like even to the copy machine 10 feet away from her desk. Lock it up lady!

She's the same person who carries a can of lysol to the bathroom with her. Why she doesn't put it in her purse is beyond me.

[Anonymous]

Love this thread!

Boss #1 - Had an affair with a subordinate and used to have sex with her in his office. They also used to snort coke at work.

Boss #2 - Was an alcoholic and was caught by a facilities guy passed out under her desk. She said she was looking for her earring, but her office was completely dark. Sometimes, she would sleep in her office overnight. She never bothered to change clothes in the mornings. She got fired but eventually turned around, and now she has a great job and is doing well.

Boss #3 - Only eats if there's a free meal, steals food from others, and goes through the trash. He has multiple advanced degrees and makes a sizable salary.

[Anonymous]

Also love this thread!

14 50 - Are you a fed?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Also love this thread!

14 50 - Are you a fed?

Nope. Both non-profit institutions.

[Anonymous]

I have a coworker who sips water every day. Every sip is followed by a refreshing "AAAH". Every time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All relatively normal, except for the shy pee-er. If you approached the bathroom at the same time or just after her, she would change course or leave the bathroom. It was painfully obvious after a couple of times. But I sympathize. I simply cannot poop with someone else in the restroom.

Shy pee-er here. IT. Is. Not. Funny.

[Anonymous]

Crazy bird lady at my office used to come in with bits of feathers and bird stink on her clothes. she said the birds needed to fly and let them fly around her house at night.

She also fished scrap paper out of the trash and said it was still good to use, and would put it back in the printer, so you would print a doc out, and there would be something else on the back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Crazy bird lady at my office used to come in with bits of feathers and bird stink on her clothes. she said the birds needed to fly and let them fly around her house at night.

She also fished scrap paper out of the trash and said it was still good to use, and would put it back in the printer, so you would print a doc out, and there would be something else on the back.

i used to work with a woman that i used to call crazy bird lady. back when i worked w/her she had 20 birds living w/her in a studio apartment. surely there can't be THAT many crazy bird ladies around town can there?

[Anonymous]

I once had a coworker who thought she was the trash police, would dig through the trashcans to find and show the boss any piece of paper that shouldn't have been thrown away ("Look! Look! Dan put this in the trash, here is his login name at the top of the page,omg, this has an account# on it and should have gone to the shredder"). She would even dig through restroom trash. Ick ick ick.

Another coworker once got fired for blowing up and cussing someone out, and threatening them with violence, because they borrowed his chair, he started hollering, goddamit give me my fucking chair, that's myyyyyyyyyy chair.

Once worked with a crazy cat lady who would regale us with way too many pictures of her 'boys' wearing clothing (doll clothing I guess) and yakked about them incessantly.

I also worked with someone who wore the same outfit every day for years. black shirt and black bottoms and black pantyhose. She made well over six figures. I don't get it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not my coworker, but a friend's: guy ate tuna fish sandwich every day. While sitting on the toilet. Doing his business.

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwww.

Damn. That just kind of makes the rest of life seem...pointless. Like why ever get up?

[Anonymous]

Did anyone else read the whole thread to see if they were anyone's weird coworker? I did. Apparently I'm not.

[Anonymous]

Coworker was convicted of possession of child porn, plead down from a distribution charge. Apparently he had a huge amount of it and was file sharing.

I accidentally found out and discovered EVERYONE knows. People are friends with him and hang out with him.

[Anonymous]

My coworkers are simply annoying but there is one who actually kind of scares me... the receptionist.

She is in her 30s. She has 9 pet chinchillas. she has that blank "nothing behind the eyes" 1000 yard stare and the only job she performs here is creeping people out. in conversation she will say whatever you just said back at you as though she just thought it up and wait patiently for your response. she was a teacher and has been "rubber roomed" and none of us know why but it could be ANYTHING.

This may not sound like much (esp. compared to some of the things you all have shared) but I'm considering writing a horror movie/screenplay with her as the main character.