Are there any middle aged or older out there who are truly happy?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wonder if the older people look unhappy to you, OP, because by a certain age, most people have learned how many people have real struggles, and they don't want to be insensitive by those struggles about how content they are. Also, as a rule, people process their struggles and stresses by talking about them. So there's a natural inclination to (1) stay mum on the good things, and (2) articulate stress, which can lead an outsider to perceive that it's all stress.

BTW, I'm 55, and my greatest sources of happiness, peace, and contentment are pretty quiet and private. Even if you knew me, you'd never "see" them. If you paid attention, you might notice small things -- like the fact that I try to make small, meaningful connections with people as I move through the world, which isn't something that miserable people tend to do. But would you see happiness itself? I guess I don't know what that would look like.

*and they don't want to be insensitive to those struggles by talking about how content they are.

[Anonymous]

38???

You aren’t middle aged. Lol

Wait until 50.

I had my second kid at 38.

I’m 56 with two in college—-and things get good again.

[Anonymous]

I am early 50s and truly happy, but my definition and needs have changed and you might not find it happy.

I have a good marriage-both of us came from emotionally and verbally abusive households. I am close to my kids. One has special needs, the other has medical issues-very challenging and far more time-consuming that what my friends encounter (their words).

I am not doing exotic travel, but am so pleased my kids can both handle domestic travel now. One has autism and couldn't handle it for quite a few years.

I get so much joy from the family I created, our dog, the outdoors, making a good meal, sipping my coffee and watching the deer, and other things you might find simple and even mundane.

The more adversity I face, the more I find joy in things many people take for granted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe you have a narrow view of happiness? I am quite happy. I am 48.

Exactly, OP needs to lower the bar to happiness. Now Deppression is the new Optimism. It’s a thing! Black is the new light. Sadness is just a happy smile when you’re on your head.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:HOW IN THE HELL CAN ANY OF YOU SERIOUSLY CLAIM HAPPINESS WHEN T-RUMPO IS STIIL IN THE WHITE HOUSE??!!?!?!

What are you suggesting we do? Get agro and go beat people up at a protest? At the end of the day there are so many more important things to me - like living my life. I don’t care that much about inflammatory hot button issues the White House uses to sensationalize the news or cover what they’re really doing - it just doesn’t matter. We’ll vote him out next time

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe you have a narrow view of happiness? I am quite happy. I am 48.

Exactly, OP needs to lower the bar to happiness. Now Deppression is the new Optimism. It’s a thing! Black is the new light. Sadness is just a happy smile when you’re on your head.

Where’s the downvote button?

[Anonymous]

I'm 56 and very happy. I have wonderful friends. I love my SECOND husband to pieces. Work is great. I have money. My 23 an 27 year old sons are struggling but we are working our way through it.

[Anonymous]

You need realistic expectations .

Happiness should not be defined by what you see on Instagram.

You will age, so that is one example of being realistic.

Hopefully, you will be more confortable financially as you age. If you are healthy, you can travel.

Having a spouse who loved and appreciates you can be a source of happiness.

A social network or neighborhood that is there for you, familiar and comfortable.

You should be confident, about your professional skills by then.

Not sure what you need to be happy. But if you have good values, those things should be enough.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Im 38F, married with a 1 and 3 year old. my long term friends and I started our 20s with such hope, potential for a happy life but it seems life has beaten all of us down in one way or another. im now one of the only ones who isn't medicated for depression or anxiety.
I have difficult days but overall I am fairly happy. when I look at women older than me (my mother, MIL, aunt, various family friends) in their 50s or 60s they are all in bad shape physically and/or mentally. I don't personally know any older women living a life I would be happy with.
Are there any older women out there living their best life who can give me some hope? If so, what factors do you think have helped you to live your life in a way that you are now happy and healthy in your 50s/60s and beyond?
Thanks in advance for any insights.

43 with two kids.

The two kids were definitely the big mistakes, but you can't really do much about that after the fact.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:HOW IN THE HELL CAN ANY OF YOU SERIOUSLY CLAIM HAPPINESS WHEN T-RUMPO IS STIIL IN THE WHITE HOUSE??!!?!?!

What are you suggesting we do? Get agro and go beat people up at a protest? At the end of the day there are so many more important things to me - like living my life. I don’t care that much about inflammatory hot button issues the White House uses to sensationalize the news or cover what they’re really doing - it just doesn’t matter. We’ll vote him out next time

lol. Elections don't matter when people ignore the results.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am early 50s and truly happy, but my definition and needs have changed and you might not find it happy.

I have a good marriage-both of us came from emotionally and verbally abusive households. I am close to my kids. One has special needs, the other has medical issues-very challenging and far more time-consuming that what my friends encounter (their words).

I am not doing exotic travel, but am so pleased my kids can both handle domestic travel now. One has autism and couldn't handle it for quite a few years.

I get so much joy from the family I created, our dog, the outdoors, making a good meal, sipping my coffee and watching the deer, and other things you might find simple and even mundane.

The more adversity I face, the more I find joy in things many people take for granted.

Not the OP, but thanks for the wisdom and perspective, PP. I resonate. Last year was tough. Now, looking at the blue sky, sunshine, squirrels, and my neighbor's dogs makes me happy. Also, the "good morning" from complete strangers when I am out running can brighten my day. I tried to live in the moment and not think too much about what had happened or what might happen. Perhaps I am foolishly or cowardly myopic, but life can change in an instant. What is real is the little moments of happiness right now, not the bygone or the future ... Marriage problems? Kids problems? Work problems? Of course, who doesn't? I tried to stay true to myself and look at the bright side of things. Life is never perfect, but that does not stop one from appreciating all the positives and blessings that come our way. Perhaps it is the imperfections that perfect the perfections ...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:HOW IN THE HELL CAN ANY OF YOU SERIOUSLY CLAIM HAPPINESS WHEN T-RUMPO IS STIIL IN THE WHITE HOUSE??!!?!?!

Awww your TDS post makes me VERY HAPPY that you are MISERABLE!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The wealthy #DINKWADS# seem to be living it up and loving life in their 60s and beyond but, like you, that ship has sailed for me so not sure what the best answer is.

Jealous much? They made better decisions then you did?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The wealthy #DINKWADS# seem to be living it up and loving life in their 60s and beyond but, like you, that ship has sailed for me so not sure what the best answer is.

Jealous much? They made better decisions then you did?

Only high income dinks get this perk. should they have kids they are likely still be fine/happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:HOW IN THE HELL CAN ANY OF YOU SERIOUSLY CLAIM HAPPINESS WHEN T-RUMPO IS STIIL IN THE WHITE HOUSE??!!?!?!

Awww your TDS post makes me VERY HAPPY that you are MISERABLE!!

Why? This is what you want for fellow Americans? This is why we’re here, you guys voted specifically for spite. How’s that working for you?