Do you enjoy attending a wedding?

[Anonymous]

We eloped. We both come from dysfunction. I enjoy a wedding that is truly about love and joy ideally during a time it's easy for us to travel and not to have use much leave. I am not a fan of the "keeping up with the Jones" events in my family where everyone must pretend we are close or the events where you are not sure why this couple is marrying because they seem miserable together.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If they in an over-the-top place or otherwise extravagant, yes. If they have good food, yes.

If they are low-key outdoors with bonfires, s'mores, pig roast, beer all over the place, yes.

If they are old school ones in a church or other uninteresting place in a generic ballroom with a generic chicken dish. NO. This is not 1995. And I went to one of these recently and it was miserable.

This exactly.

[Anonymous]

If it’s a close friend or someone who was a close friend, yes. I enjoy their joy s d seeing other friends.
My wife’s 2nd cousin twice removed, no. Boring.

[Anonymous]

I used to like going to weddings. I still tear up when people say sentimental things at wedding. But, I just know the truth. It isn't a happy ending when you get married. It's just the beginning of alot of stress. And I see it in many couples that had a big wedding.

I am not married but my partner and I have a teenager together and we live together. But, we go through the same journey like married couples, same problems that other couples go through. Same in-law issues, same family issues. The main difference is we have our own separate financial accounts. If he wants to get himself a $150 pair of running shoes, go ahead, not my money. One less thing to argue about even though we complain about the high prices of everything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I received a lot of criticism from a bride who was not happy about the cranberry colored dress I wore to her December wedding. I have decided that attending weddings is just not worth the risk of offending the bride. I will attend the wedding of my son but all other weddings invitations will be declined.

What? How can a cranberry colored dress be "offensive"?? How rude of her!! I have seen people show up to a formal wedding in shorts, so at that point, I certainly felt I had seen everything. LOL.

It was all about the pictures. Anything red or similar threw off the look she wanted.

Well that is silly because it would be easy to change the color of a guest dress in post.

That is crazy! That is like having to explain to guests: "this is okay to wear, this is not okay to wear". Treating guests like they are country bumpkins (or somehow beneath the bride) is not a good look. Aren't they (presumably) mostly grown adult guests? Wow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We eloped. We both come from dysfunction. I enjoy a wedding that is truly about love and joy ideally during a time it's easy for us to travel and not to have use much leave. I am not a fan of the "keeping up with the Jones" events in my family where everyone must pretend we are close or the events where you are not sure why this couple is marrying because they seem miserable together.

+1

I think some families are about looking for and/or creating drama, dirt that isn't there, exclusion, and/or a scapegoat - in order to try to make them look "better" (the irony!). It is hard to enjoy their weddings, if they were very judgmental and/or anti-supportive to you during your wedding time (and/or since). Some "friends" can be like that, also - ex: the "celebration" includes a prostitute, because the "friend" can't get laid; or the (same) "friend" wants to make the new couple's terrific sex life or relatively decent financial situation into something terrible, or otherwise "stick it to" the beautiful new spouse. Perhaps this is another thread to be created.

Point being, in dysfunctional families, misery loves company - so it makes it difficult to be happy for miserable people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I enjoy attending well-hosted weddings and am happy to travel if it's not too inconvenient or expensive. Probably 1-2 a year at this point (age 40).

+1 I won't go if it costs much to travel. I'll drive and get a hotel for one night. I won't get plane tix for our 5 person family. And yes to well-hosted. Guests don't need party favors or anything extravagant, but make sure there's ample food and drink and don't charge your guests for it.

[Anonymous]

No

[Anonymous]

I've always enjoyed weddings. Even more so these days as it gives us the excuse to dump the kids at grandma's for a day or two.

[Anonymous]

Yes, if it's a nice wedding.
Ceremony not TOO long.
Comfortable setting - not to hot or too cold.
Plentiful and delicious food and drink.
Get dressed up, it's a nice date night.

Extra kudos if fun dancing and transportation provided.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If they in an over-the-top place or otherwise extravagant, yes. If they have good food, yes.

If they are low-key outdoors with bonfires, s'mores, pig roast, beer all over the place, yes.

If they are old school ones in a church or other uninteresting place in a generic ballroom with a generic chicken dish. NO. This is not 1995. And I went to one of these recently and it was miserable.

Agree - as long as it's family or close friends. I've been to so many of my husband's friends' weddings where I don't know anyone, and it's such a long painful night. Zero interest in paying a babysitter to chit chat with strangers.

[Anonymous]

I majored in sociology and I love to dance. Of course I love weddings. They are fascinating and fun. Our kids' friends and our friends' kids are now starting to get married and you better believe I'm going to every single one we get invited to. Plus, we're getting invited to some second time around weddings -- now, those are interesting. For those responding that they don't enjoy going to weddings -- please consider forwarding those invitations to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've always enjoyed weddings. Even more so these days as it gives us the excuse to dump the kids at grandma's for a day or two.

Wow, you have a truly AMAZING parent!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I majored in sociology and I love to dance. Of course I love weddings. They are fascinating and fun. Our kids' friends and our friends' kids are now starting to get married and you better believe I'm going to every single one we get invited to. Plus, we're getting invited to some second time around weddings -- now, those are interesting. For those responding that they don't enjoy going to weddings -- please consider forwarding those invitations to me.

For the half that doesn't like weddings - can you tell them how to enjoy them? If you are not particularly close to whomever is getting married?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I enjoy attending well-hosted weddings and am happy to travel if it's not too inconvenient or expensive. Probably 1-2 a year at this point (age 40).

+1 I won't go if it costs much to travel. I'll drive and get a hotel for one night. I won't get plane tix for our 5 person family. And yes to well-hosted. Guests don't need party favors or anything extravagant, but make sure there's ample food and drink and don't charge your guests for it.

+1

And no undue guest burdens such as doing everything for photos and social media. I recently attended a wedding where the bride and groom requested all phones be put away, and it was certainly not all about the photos, and it made it a fun, relaxing night. If there are things done for photos, you can just tell, and it cheapens the whole experience/night.