Teen’s dirty laundry

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am the laundry person at home. I do everyone's laundry daily. I sort, use different settings and products for different loads, fold and put away. I probably run 2-3 loads every day. I have two washers for different sized loads and they are a bl

My teen is in college nearby and he brings his clothes, towels and bedsheets home every week, and I do his laundry and fold it for him. Interestingly, he had taught other boys to do their laundry in his dorm and how to fold clothes. Why does he not do his laundry at school? He says it is because students forget their clothes in the washer and it becomes moldy and gross. Also, some drunk person threw up in one of the washing machines. But the truth is that I am the laundry person at home. I do all the laundry from clothes to bedsheet, towels, bathmats, from bookbags to uggs boots/sneakers.

He also tells me gory tales of how some students live like pigs with their floor completely covered with trash. They never change their bedsheets and keep using the same towels. My son is a neat freak and so is his roommate. Their dorm room is neat that it is the default room for get togethers. The girls don't like to go to stinky and gross rooms.

I have certain expectations from my family members about their work and education, but household chores is really not one of them. However, my DH and kids, know how to clean the house, do laundry, cook food and iron their clothes - and will work alongside me if I ask them to. It is just that when I am around they do not have to do it.

Congrats? You’ve raised a nonfunctional child.

Nope, I have raised a kid who knows how to outsource his chores and knows that he has to be a high earner in the future.

Most college kids who were supposed to be functional because they were doing their own laundry since 5 yrs old, have become non-functional and dirty in college.

Frankly, he (and you) sound like you have OCD.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am the laundry person at home. I do everyone's laundry daily. I sort, use different settings and products for different loads, fold and put away. I probably run 2-3 loads every day. I have two washers for different sized loads and they are a bl

My teen is in college nearby and he brings his clothes, towels and bedsheets home every week, and I do his laundry and fold it for him. Interestingly, he had taught other boys to do their laundry in his dorm and how to fold clothes. Why does he not do his laundry at school? He says it is because students forget their clothes in the washer and it becomes moldy and gross. Also, some drunk person threw up in one of the washing machines. But the truth is that I am the laundry person at home. I do all the laundry from clothes to bedsheet, towels, bathmats, from bookbags to uggs boots/sneakers.

He also tells me gory tales of how some students live like pigs with their floor completely covered with trash. They never change their bedsheets and keep using the same towels. My son is a neat freak and so is his roommate. Their dorm room is neat that it is the default room for get togethers. The girls don't like to go to stinky and gross rooms.

I have certain expectations from my family members about their work and education, but household chores is really not one of them. However, my DH and kids, know how to clean the house, do laundry, cook food and iron their clothes - and will work alongside me if I ask them to. It is just that when I am around they do not have to do it.

Congrats? You’ve raised a nonfunctional child.

Nope, I have raised a kid who knows how to outsource his chores and knows that he has to be a high earner in the future.

Most college kids who were supposed to be functional because they were doing their own laundry since 5 yrs old, have become non-functional and dirty in college.

He is telling you all these horror stories so you will continue doing his laundry. My DS is neat and clean but has been doing his own laundry since he went away to college. Is he going to run to your house/let it sit for the maid if his family member gets ill and throws up or will he clean it up? Stop babying him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am the laundry person at home. I do everyone's laundry daily. I sort, use different settings and products for different loads, fold and put away. I probably run 2-3 loads every day. I have two washers for different sized loads and they are a bl

My teen is in college nearby and he brings his clothes, towels and bedsheets home every week, and I do his laundry and fold it for him. Interestingly, he had taught other boys to do their laundry in his dorm and how to fold clothes. Why does he not do his laundry at school? He says it is because students forget their clothes in the washer and it becomes moldy and gross. Also, some drunk person threw up in one of the washing machines. But the truth is that I am the laundry person at home. I do all the laundry from clothes to bedsheet, towels, bathmats, from bookbags to uggs boots/sneakers.

He also tells me gory tales of how some students live like pigs with their floor completely covered with trash. They never change their bedsheets and keep using the same towels. My son is a neat freak and so is his roommate. Their dorm room is neat that it is the default room for get togethers. The girls don't like to go to stinky and gross rooms.

I have certain expectations from my family members about their work and education, but household chores is really not one of them. However, my DH and kids, know how to clean the house, do laundry, cook food and iron their clothes - and will work alongside me if I ask them to. It is just that when I am around they do not have to do it.

Congrats? You’ve raised a nonfunctional child.

Nope, I have raised a kid who knows how to outsource his chores and knows that he has to be a high earner in the future.

Most college kids who were supposed to be functional because they were doing their own laundry since 5 yrs old, have become non-functional and dirty in college.

Frankly, he (and you) sound like you have OCD.

Frankly, mental illness does not run in our family. Frankly, you are projecting the fails of your own family on others.

Cleanliness is now called being OCD? By whom? Hoarder, trashy, filthy pigs?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am the laundry person at home. I do everyone's laundry daily. I sort, use different settings and products for different loads, fold and put away. I probably run 2-3 loads every day. I have two washers for different sized loads and they are a bl

My teen is in college nearby and he brings his clothes, towels and bedsheets home every week, and I do his laundry and fold it for him. Interestingly, he had taught other boys to do their laundry in his dorm and how to fold clothes. Why does he not do his laundry at school? He says it is because students forget their clothes in the washer and it becomes moldy and gross. Also, some drunk person threw up in one of the washing machines. But the truth is that I am the laundry person at home. I do all the laundry from clothes to bedsheet, towels, bathmats, from bookbags to uggs boots/sneakers.

He also tells me gory tales of how some students live like pigs with their floor completely covered with trash. They never change their bedsheets and keep using the same towels. My son is a neat freak and so is his roommate. Their dorm room is neat that it is the default room for get togethers. The girls don't like to go to stinky and gross rooms.

I have certain expectations from my family members about their work and education, but household chores is really not one of them. However, my DH and kids, know how to clean the house, do laundry, cook food and iron their clothes - and will work alongside me if I ask them to. It is just that when I am around they do not have to do it.

Congrats? You’ve raised a nonfunctional child.

Nope, I have raised a kid who knows how to outsource his chores and knows that he has to be a high earner in the future.

Most college kids who were supposed to be functional because they were doing their own laundry since 5 yrs old, have become non-functional and dirty in college.

He is telling you all these horror stories so you will continue doing his laundry. My DS is neat and clean but has been doing his own laundry since he went away to college. Is he going to run to your house/let it sit for the maid if his family member gets ill and throws up or will he clean it up? Stop babying him.

I disagree. He knows all the adulting skills better than others. Cleaning, laundry, cooking, servicing his car, ironing his clothes etc. Afterall, all of this is minimum wage work that unskilled labor can do easily, so it is not rocket science or has a steep learning curve. I would rather he excels at school, does internships, socializes, participates in various clubs, volunteers, does his part time job, exercises, travels etc.

Once you have been raised in a functional and smooth running household, you are used to a clean house, laundered clothes, delicious home cooked meals, entertaining at home etc - even if you do not help out with these activities - you are used to a standard of living that you will replicate when the responsibility lands on you. I did not know how to cook growing up, even though my mom is a fantastic cook. When I lived on my own, I recalled all the wonderful tastes of her cooking and was able to replicate it based on memory and her instructions. You absorb these skills very organically if you have been immersed in it while growing up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is always a surprise for me to learn that lots of you do individual laundry. How does this work? Multiple mini loads (assuming you separate whites)? Isn’t this wasteful? Maybe it is because I come from another country but we have always done our laundry together: whites, darks, towels and bedsheets, each one in a different load. We rotate who does it, my kids do their share, and then each one is responsible to fold and put away their own clothes.

You really don’t get it?

Each person has their own laundry basket. When it’s full, they wash all their clothes together. If it’s a light load they might add their towel.

Is this really that hard to understand? How did you do laundry when you were single? I’m guessing you didn’t do all your roommates laundry because “it’s easier to do them together.” Yet somehow, you want us to believe that getting married suddenly makes it “easier” to do chores for multiple adults than for one. Sure. Whatever you need to tell yourself.

NP here, 3rd gen American. YOU don't get it. Laundry should be separated since darks can bleed into whites, lint producers (towels, flannel) onto lint attracting fabrics, jeans and other heavy items can damage lighter fabrics plus take longer to dry, etc. Your way may be the best for you but not the right way.

+ 1

I agree.
Not only you have to seperate loads, but also use different products for different loads. and different settings for washing and drying. For eg - I wash all the perm press dark clothes on perm press setting with dark woollite and fabric softner. My white towels get washed with oxyclean and tide-pods. All the kitchen towels with oxyclean, tide powder and bleach. Socks and underwear are one load and are not mixed with other loads because they are the germiest clothes. So it makes sense to bundle everyone's laundry together.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am the laundry person at home. I do everyone's laundry daily. I sort, use different settings and products for different loads, fold and put away. I probably run 2-3 loads every day. I have two washers for different sized loads and they are a bl

My teen is in college nearby and he brings his clothes, towels and bedsheets home every week, and I do his laundry and fold it for him. Interestingly, he had taught other boys to do their laundry in his dorm and how to fold clothes. Why does he not do his laundry at school? He says it is because students forget their clothes in the washer and it becomes moldy and gross. Also, some drunk person threw up in one of the washing machines. But the truth is that I am the laundry person at home. I do all the laundry from clothes to bedsheet, towels, bathmats, from bookbags to uggs boots/sneakers.

He also tells me gory tales of how some students live like pigs with their floor completely covered with trash. They never change their bedsheets and keep using the same towels. My son is a neat freak and so is his roommate. Their dorm room is neat that it is the default room for get togethers. The girls don't like to go to stinky and gross rooms.

I have certain expectations from my family members about their work and education, but household chores is really not one of them. However, my DH and kids, know how to clean the house, do laundry, cook food and iron their clothes - and will work alongside me if I ask them to. It is just that when I am around they do not have to do it.

Congrats? You’ve raised a nonfunctional child.

Nope, I have raised a kid who knows how to outsource his chores and knows that he has to be a high earner in the future.

Most college kids who were supposed to be functional because they were doing their own laundry since 5 yrs old, have become non-functional and dirty in college.

Frankly, he (and you) sound like you have OCD.

Frankly, mental illness does not run in our family. Frankly, you are projecting the fails of your own family on others.

Cleanliness is now called being OCD? By whom? Hoarder, trashy, filthy pigs?

Your (and your son's) preoccupation with cleanliness to the point of him not being able to use his college's facilities is not normal. Several posters have pointed that out to you but you are still in denial.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am the laundry person at home. I do everyone's laundry daily. I sort, use different settings and products for different loads, fold and put away. I probably run 2-3 loads every day. I have two washers for different sized loads and they are a bl

My teen is in college nearby and he brings his clothes, towels and bedsheets home every week, and I do his laundry and fold it for him. Interestingly, he had taught other boys to do their laundry in his dorm and how to fold clothes. Why does he not do his laundry at school? He says it is because students forget their clothes in the washer and it becomes moldy and gross. Also, some drunk person threw up in one of the washing machines. But the truth is that I am the laundry person at home. I do all the laundry from clothes to bedsheet, towels, bathmats, from bookbags to uggs boots/sneakers.

He also tells me gory tales of how some students live like pigs with their floor completely covered with trash. They never change their bedsheets and keep using the same towels. My son is a neat freak and so is his roommate. Their dorm room is neat that it is the default room for get togethers. The girls don't like to go to stinky and gross rooms.

I have certain expectations from my family members about their work and education, but household chores is really not one of them. However, my DH and kids, know how to clean the house, do laundry, cook food and iron their clothes - and will work alongside me if I ask them to. It is just that when I am around they do not have to do it.

Congrats? You’ve raised a nonfunctional child.

Nope, I have raised a kid who knows how to outsource his chores and knows that he has to be a high earner in the future.

Most college kids who were supposed to be functional because they were doing their own laundry since 5 yrs old, have become non-functional and dirty in college.

He is telling you all these horror stories so you will continue doing his laundry. My DS is neat and clean but has been doing his own laundry since he went away to college. Is he going to run to your house/let it sit for the maid if his family member gets ill and throws up or will he clean it up? Stop babying him.

I disagree. He knows all the adulting skills better than others. Cleaning, laundry, cooking, servicing his car, ironing his clothes etc. Afterall, all of this is minimum wage work that unskilled labor can do easily, so it is not rocket science or has a steep learning curve. I would rather he excels at school, does internships, socializes, participates in various clubs, volunteers, does his part time job, exercises, travels etc.

Once you have been raised in a functional and smooth running household, you are used to a clean house, laundered clothes, delicious home cooked meals, entertaining at home etc - even if you do not help out with these activities - you are used to a standard of living that you will replicate when the responsibility lands on you. I did not know how to cook growing up, even though my mom is a fantastic cook. When I lived on my own, I recalled all the wonderful tastes of her cooking and was able to replicate it based on memory and her instructions. You absorb these skills very organically if you have been immersed in it while growing up.

methinks the lady doth protest too much.