what happened to "spouse" that got replaced with "partner"?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s to help normalize using partner. It’s a more inclusive term.

I am straight but I use partner sometime because I feel dumb saying boyfriend at age 44.

Partner makes you sound like a lezbian

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It sounds better than still calling someone “fiancé” 4 years into a relationship.

Going strong after 16 years of being a “fiancé.” If you have a problem with it, that’s on you… I don’t. 😁

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It sounds better than still calling someone “fiancé” 4 years into a relationship.

Going strong after 16 years of being a “fiancé.” If you have a problem with it, that’s on you… I don’t. 😁

This is not a flex.

[Anonymous]

I hate that term.
spouse, gf or bf.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It sounds better than still calling someone “fiancé” 4 years into a relationship.

Going strong after 16 years of being a “fiancé.” If you have a problem with it, that’s on you… I don’t. 😁

This is not a flex.

Eh?

[Anonymous]

The old people I volunteer with have been saying partner in reference to a long term boyfriend/girlfriend. It’s the young people that are just now catching.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My boyfriend uses "partner" because he's too chicken to get married, but "boyfriend" makes him feel disposable, like we're just dating and someone else could swoop in and snatch me up. I guess he feels partners are committed, but boyfriends get dumped.

I refuse to use it. I told him he's just a boyfriend until he puts a ring on it, then he can be upgraded to husband. But I'm not using "partner", if he won't commit, why should I?

you both sound super mature. I can't fathom why you are not married.

[Anonymous]

As a lesbian, I used the term “partner” before the marriage was legal. After I used the word spouse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s to help normalize using partner. It’s a more inclusive term.

I am straight but I use partner sometime because I feel dumb saying boyfriend at age 44.

It's an idiotic term.

The correct verbiage is husband, wife, significant other.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just following the lead of those trendsetting Canadians.

Also common in the UK, Germany, and many Nordic countries.

False. They have different terms. like Lebensreisender, which means "life traveling companion". There is no comparison.

[Anonymous]

Partner has been around for a while. It was started to handle couples who weren't married. You know, people living together.

But you'll never convince the people who are hot and bothered about it and talking about gender. Seems like the only "sin" people are worried about these days is LBGTQ.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just following the lead of those trendsetting Canadians.

Also common in the UK, Germany, and many Nordic countries.

False. They have different terms. like Lebensreisender, which means "life traveling companion". There is no comparison.

Not the PP to whom you're responding, but -- in the UK, "partner" is extremely common and has been for a long time. I get it, you're focused on the other countries you mention, just wanted to note that partner has been a norm in the UK for ages now. It seems to me to be even more normal in the UK to live together without marrying than it is in the US, too. (Speaking very generally re: both countries)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:BF/GF sounds juvenile past age 35 or so.

This and also to reinforce any and every term over the inane "DH/DW" etc nonsense that's gotten so prevalent.

DP. You do realize, don't you, that DH/DW really only exists in places like DCUM forums for brevity? Not in the real world or spoken conversation? I guess you'd prefer we use just H or W here and drop the "dear." Whatever. But don't make out like "DH/DW" is something used by society at large; it's an online thing. And before you say online somehow equals society at large or drives the language etc....Just, no. Not with DH/DW.

[Anonymous]

I can't stand the word partner. Sounds either like a country western star or a business partner.

And no, I don't think partner is more inclusive. Spouse is gender neutral. Gay marriage is legal now. I strongly believe in marriage (if you want kids) and don't think we should normalize living together unmarried with children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To me “partner” means you’re in a committed relationship as a family unit, and may or may not be married.

NP. I agree, PP. I think this thread attracts a lot of posters so far who are just knee-jerk resistant to it. I do think it has an element of inherent confusion--my spouse has a business partner and "partner" is the term used in their official relationship, so to speak. They introduce each other as such in the work context.

But I think partner is also the best we can do right now for, as you say, PP, a couple in a committed life relationship where they are a family unit, married or not and are beyond "boyfriend"/"girlfriend," which to me does not connote the kind of family unit you mention. (I know, those terms can mean a unit, but they also get used for high school dating etc. Not the best terms.) I do tend to assume "not married" when I hear "partner" in the relationship context but of course it can mean spouses as well.

I don't think people need to be as personally offended by its use as some PPs here seem to be; they don't have to use it for their own relationships, but it doesn't harm them if others choose to use it. People need to be less judgemental about terms unless they're the ones to whom those terms are applied against their wishes.