what happened to "spouse" that got replaced with "partner"?

[Anonymous]

20 years ago, I took a fitness class. One day a classmate told us she'd been at the hospital all night with her partner who had a ruptured ovarian cyst. She was relieved her partner got care in time. I remember thinking, "wow! She really cares about her business partner. I wonder if the business would fail if she couldn't work.". Fast forward some years and a mutual friend told me that classmate and her wife are getting divorced. I was like oooooh! Nowadays, I refer to my friend's significant others as partners, because bf/gf is ridiculous after 30.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it sounds stupid wokespeak and so I avoid using it. If the desire is there, one can almost always avoid inserting a label (partner, girlfriend, significant other, spouse, whatever).

Person A: hey is Mary coming to the barbecue?

Person B: Yes, she rsvp'd they'd be coming after 3 o'clock.


Person A: I need to get a headcount. Is Susie coming to the escape room or not?

Person B: She is; she and Jim plan to attend.


Person A Grandma: Is Kara coming back to Massachusetts for Christmas?

Person B: No, so sad, this year Kara's spending Christmas with Lisa in California.

Person A Grandma: Oh! I'll miss her. Who is Lisa?

Person B: Grandma they've been seeing each other pretty seriously for 3 months now.

Sure, but in contexts like work the lack of specificity of partner is a plus. I don't necessarily want to divulge the name of my "partner" or what my status is.

This makes no sense though. If you don't want your professional colleagues to know if you are romantically coupled, or not, with another human being, then don't say anything. At all. ie, don't say "Aidan" or "Emily," and also don't say "partner" or "lover" or "husband."

NP
That's a level of vigilance I don't want. Partner is nice catchall term where you can enter the conversation and not be too forthcoming.

[Anonymous]

There must be more to it than the b/f and g/f thing people are talking about in this thread. Several people at work that I know are married have used the term partner instead of husband/wife/spouse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's a ridiculous word to describe a person with whom one is in a romantic relationship; yet another attempt by infantilized progressives to rewrite the language to their own self-serving means.

Whenever someone uses that term, I ask how long they've been working together.

you sound delightful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's a ridiculous word to describe a person with whom one is in a romantic relationship; yet another attempt by infantilized progressives to rewrite the language to their own self-serving means.

Whenever someone uses that term, I ask how long they've been working together.

Language evolves, unlike you.

“Partner” floating around on its own is an inherently meaningless term, though. John and Jane could be business partners, dance partners, tennis partners, figure skating partners, spades partners, and so on. AAs in some parts of the country call their friends their partner too. Even the gays long qualified it as “life partner”.

Utterly vague and vapid language for people too lacking in courage to call a thing by its name. You feel childish for calling a 50 year old man your boyfriend? It’s because the whole premise is childish on its face!

But it’s not floating around on its own, there is this thing called “context.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There must be more to it than the b/f and g/f thing people are talking about in this thread. Several people at work that I know are married have used the term partner instead of husband/wife/spouse.

I work with people mostly outside the US and they all say partner. It would seem weird for me to use "husband."

[Anonymous]

A spouse is someone you’re married to.

A partner is someone you’re shacking up with.

[Anonymous]

If you’ve been with someone long-term but are not planning to marry, partner is what you call them. Bf/gf sounds dumb after that amount of time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To me “partner” means you’re in a committed relationship as a family unit, and may or may not be married.

I would only use it for an unmarried couple. People use it on purpose to indicate that they are committed, but not married. People don’t have to be married to be committed to each other and the word partner is a perfect way to indicate high level of commitment.

Says the woman who has been waiting for years for a proposal from her "boyfriend."

I'm not the person you quoted but not every woman aspires to marry. I was with my ex for over 20 years, we had a home (that I still live in), and raised a family. Five years into our relationship I got the proposal and ring, but we never ended up marrying. It just wasn't important to me to go through with the ceremony and there has not been one negative, even after our breakup. I have no regrets.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's a ridiculous word to describe a person with whom one is in a romantic relationship; yet another attempt by infantilized progressives to rewrite the language to their own self-serving means.

Whenever someone uses that term, I ask how long they've been working together.

Language evolves, unlike you.

“Partner” floating around on its own is an inherently meaningless term, though. John and Jane could be business partners, dance partners, tennis partners, figure skating partners, spades partners, and so on. AAs in some parts of the country call their friends their partner too. Even the gays long qualified it as “life partner”.

Utterly vague and vapid language for people too lacking in courage to call a thing by its name. You feel childish for calling a 50 year old man your boyfriend? It’s because the whole premise is childish on its face!

But it’s not floating around on its own, there is this thing called “context.”

“My husband and I are looking for a new place.”

“The father of my children and I are looking for a new place.”

“My roomate and I are looking for a new place.”

“My boyfriend and I are looking for a new place.”

“My partner and I are looking for a new place.”

Which one of these five statements provides the least information? You [not you specifically] impose making an assumption of your own weird self-constructed universe on the audience rather than being precise in language. Words mean things. How can partner simultaneously mean “person who is my life partner of many years,” “person who is my boyfriend but we are of an age where it sounds silly,” and “person whose relationship with me could be of any nature/duration but I would rather not divulge out of privacy” at the same time and we’re all just supposed to emotionally labor over which one it is by context? In a way, that is quite narcissistic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's a ridiculous word to describe a person with whom one is in a romantic relationship; yet another attempt by infantilized progressives to rewrite the language to their own self-serving means.

Whenever someone uses that term, I ask how long they've been working together.

Language evolves, unlike you.

“Partner” floating around on its own is an inherently meaningless term, though. John and Jane could be business partners, dance partners, tennis partners, figure skating partners, spades partners, and so on. AAs in some parts of the country call their friends their partner too. Even the gays long qualified it as “life partner”.

Utterly vague and vapid language for people too lacking in courage to call a thing by its name. You feel childish for calling a 50 year old man your boyfriend? It’s because the whole premise is childish on its face!

But it’s not floating around on its own, there is this thing called “context.”

“My husband and I are looking for a new place.”

“The father of my children and I are looking for a new place.”

“My roomate and I are looking for a new place.”

“My boyfriend and I are looking for a new place.”

“My partner and I are looking for a new place.”

Which one of these five statements provides the least information? You [not you specifically] impose making an assumption of your own weird self-constructed universe on the audience rather than being precise in language. Words mean things. How can partner simultaneously mean “person who is my life partner of many years,” “person who is my boyfriend but we are of an age where it sounds silly,” and “person whose relationship with me could be of any nature/duration but I would rather not divulge out of privacy” at the same time and we’re all just supposed to emotionally labor over which one it is by context? In a way, that is quite narcissistic.

NP. What a truly bizarre comment.

[Anonymous]

My partner calls me his wife. We are not married.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's a ridiculous word to describe a person with whom one is in a romantic relationship; yet another attempt by infantilized progressives to rewrite the language to their own self-serving means.

Whenever someone uses that term, I ask how long they've been working together.

30 beautiful years, 2 kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's a ridiculous word to describe a person with whom one is in a romantic relationship; yet another attempt by infantilized progressives to rewrite the language to their own self-serving means.

Whenever someone uses that term, I ask how long they've been working together.

Language evolves, unlike you.

“Partner” floating around on its own is an inherently meaningless term, though. John and Jane could be business partners, dance partners, tennis partners, figure skating partners, spades partners, and so on. AAs in some parts of the country call their friends their partner too. Even the gays long qualified it as “life partner”.

Utterly vague and vapid language for people too lacking in courage to call a thing by its name. You feel childish for calling a 50 year old man your boyfriend? It’s because the whole premise is childish on its face!

But it’s not floating around on its own, there is this thing called “context.”

“My husband and I are looking for a new place.”

“The father of my children and I are looking for a new place.”

“My roomate and I are looking for a new place.”

“My boyfriend and I are looking for a new place.”

“My partner and I are looking for a new place.”

Which one of these five statements provides the least information? You [not you specifically] impose making an assumption of your own weird self-constructed universe on the audience rather than being precise in language. Words mean things. How can partner simultaneously mean “person who is my life partner of many years,” “person who is my boyfriend but we are of an age where it sounds silly,” and “person whose relationship with me could be of any nature/duration but I would rather not divulge out of privacy” at the same time and we’re all just supposed to emotionally labor over which one it is by context? In a way, that is quite narcissistic.

NP. What a truly bizarre comment.

And what a truly useless, insipid comment. Thanks for adding nothing of value to the conversation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's a ridiculous word to describe a person with whom one is in a romantic relationship; yet another attempt by infantilized progressives to rewrite the language to their own self-serving means.

Whenever someone uses that term, I ask how long they've been working together.

At least you out yourself as being uneducated. It’s best others know quickly. FYI, Partner has been the norm to be used for adults in countries like the UK and Australia forever.

So? Since when are they the standard bearers?

You want to know since when the U.K has been the standard bearer for the..English language?

Could you let that sink in for a hot second?