Things you have bought for “status” reasons

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can't think of anything.

That said, being an only child allowed my parents to afford to do some things for me that I wouldn't have been able to had they been paying for more kids. I got to go to a nice GT summer camp, they sent me to a good college prep parochial HS and then they paid for my private college degree. I am forever grateful to them.

That said, we have always been bargain hunters - like, I was always so proud when people complemented something I was wearing and I could say "got this at KMart!" I was just telling my daughter the other day about the knock off Keds I had a TON of pairs of because they were 3 for $10

We got her Uggs off Craigslist for very cheap from some kid who got like 5 pairs and never wore them all.

I feel you on that! I got my wedding dress off the rack at David’s Bridal for $200 and laughed inside when people asked me what boutique I got it from.

That's awesome I actually got mine at a boutique that was going out of business near Annapolis (I live in VA). I got a several thousand dollar dress for @$600. SCORE!

I wasn't going around BRAGGING about my KMart (or other cheaper store/clearance) buys, but it is just nice when someone thinks something you are wearing is cute (like the aforementioned Keds lookalikes) and you are able to say they are very affordable.

It’s bragging. The whole point is that you could afford to shop elsewhere but you’re so clever and frugal. That’s why you’re telling people.

I do this too, grew up doing it. Also come from a family who eschews labels but everyone used mason Pearson hair brushes (I didn't realize how $$ they were untill I casually picked one up to buy in my 20s and was like yikes!!) and everyone tries to be super frugal and not wasteful but can buy whatever they want and does when it suits them. This is showing off that your are so upper crust that you can do whatever you want, you are still better than hoi poloi. Its a signifier that you are above the petty status that can be bought and sold, you have "breeding" and people cant purchase or strive for what you are. I used to do this a lot but I realized it made people around me feel bad since ppl in DC so so proud of their brands/homes/degrees and I don't like making people feel small even if they make different choices and have different values than I do.

[Anonymous]

That’s some weird reverse psychology stuff right there

Just because rich folks do this to screw with others heads doesn’t mean that is everyone’s motivation

We were middle class and just liked good bargains and were happy to tell others where we got said bargain when asked

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That’s some weird reverse psychology stuff right there

Just because rich folks do this to screw with others heads doesn’t mean that is everyone’s motivation

We were middle class and just liked good bargains and were happy to tell others where we got said bargain when asked

See you have SES guilt (similar to white guilt, but this is just about having money). DH is so embarrassed of our salaries that he downplays and lies about everything. Everything was "a bargain" when people compliment him and he often won't tell his family or hometown friends about our vacations or really anything about our lives.

[Anonymous]

I definitely do this, but the "status" that I'm going for is not "rich."

For example, I bought a CRV because Hondas last forever and a CRV is a good family car. It has good safety ratings. When I see other people in CRVs I feel like they have similar values--they want a good deal that's safe and reliable.

I wear Birkenstocks because they last forever (I've had one of my pairs since the 90s). When I see other people wearing Birkenstocks, I think they value comfort and foot health and durability and longevity over fashion.

I bought my kid an LL Bean bookbag when he was born, because they last forever and I didn't want to waste money on a diaper bag. We used it as a diaper bag and now he uses it in elementary school. When I see other kids with LL Bean backpacks, I think their parents value longevity and simplicity and reasonable prices.

I buy Kirkland brand for a lot of stuff. When I see other people who buy Kirkland brand things, I think they value buying in bulk to save time and money.

We have a large veggie / fruit garden in our backyard. When I see other people who grow their own food, I think they value health, delicious produce, and saving money, maybe even decreasing carbon footprint, etc. I also think they have time and enjoy gardening.

Basically, the "status" symbols I think I display are those of someone who values reasonable judgement, safety, health, time, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I definitely do this, but the "status" that I'm going for is not "rich."

For example, I bought a CRV because Hondas last forever and a CRV is a good family car. It has good safety ratings. When I see other people in CRVs I feel like they have similar values--they want a good deal that's safe and reliable.

I wear Birkenstocks because they last forever (I've had one of my pairs since the 90s). When I see other people wearing Birkenstocks, I think they value comfort and foot health and durability and longevity over fashion.

I bought my kid an LL Bean bookbag when he was born, because they last forever and I didn't want to waste money on a diaper bag. We used it as a diaper bag and now he uses it in elementary school. When I see other kids with LL Bean backpacks, I think their parents value longevity and simplicity and reasonable prices.

I buy Kirkland brand for a lot of stuff. When I see other people who buy Kirkland brand things, I think they value buying in bulk to save time and money.

We have a large veggie / fruit garden in our backyard. When I see other people who grow their own food, I think they value health, delicious produce, and saving money, maybe even decreasing carbon footprint, etc. I also think they have time and enjoy gardening.

Basically, the "status" symbols I think I display are those of someone who values reasonable judgement, safety, health, time, etc.

Those aren't status symbols. I'm not sure why people have difficulty grasping the concept of status symbols, which is simply showing off your access to money and prestige, and therefore your own higher status in society. There is nothing complicated about the meaning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First class airplane tickets. I'm fat and can't figure out how to dress well, so it's the only thing I can do while traveling to not look like I belong at the Dollar Store.

That might sound snotty, but it's actually my incredibly low self-esteem talking.

Look, if you’re going to buy something for low self-esteem and status it may as well be first class tickets because the experience is glorious.

I've accumulated tons of points after a couple of years of not traveling and spending too much money on useless crap, so I'm traveling first class to Israel this summer. I am so excited. It'll be my first time.

Have a wonderful time. On the plane and in Israel! I once got bumped up to one of those first class sections where it's on the second floor of the plane and everyone has their own little pod - it was like a 12 hour flight and I was disappointed when it was time to get out!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I definitely do this, but the "status" that I'm going for is not "rich."

For example, I bought a CRV because Hondas last forever and a CRV is a good family car. It has good safety ratings. When I see other people in CRVs I feel like they have similar values--they want a good deal that's safe and reliable.

I wear Birkenstocks because they last forever (I've had one of my pairs since the 90s). When I see other people wearing Birkenstocks, I think they value comfort and foot health and durability and longevity over fashion.

I bought my kid an LL Bean bookbag when he was born, because they last forever and I didn't want to waste money on a diaper bag. We used it as a diaper bag and now he uses it in elementary school. When I see other kids with LL Bean backpacks, I think their parents value longevity and simplicity and reasonable prices.

I buy Kirkland brand for a lot of stuff. When I see other people who buy Kirkland brand things, I think they value buying in bulk to save time and money.

We have a large veggie / fruit garden in our backyard. When I see other people who grow their own food, I think they value health, delicious produce, and saving money, maybe even decreasing carbon footprint, etc. I also think they have time and enjoy gardening.

Basically, the "status" symbols I think I display are those of someone who values reasonable judgement, safety, health, time, etc.

Those aren't status symbols. I'm not sure why people have difficulty grasping the concept of status symbols, which is simply showing off your access to money and prestige, and therefore your own higher status in society. There is nothing complicated about the meaning.

No, PP is correct. Status does not merely apply to "shiny things". There is a whole subset of DCUM that lives like this, including me (not those specific brands, exactly, but similar). We could afford to buy more baubles, but we don't, because it's not in line with our values. While most of these people are not Old Money, they exercise a similar mindset, compared to New Money and ostentatious displays of wealth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I definitely do this, but the "status" that I'm going for is not "rich."

For example, I bought a CRV because Hondas last forever and a CRV is a good family car. It has good safety ratings. When I see other people in CRVs I feel like they have similar values--they want a good deal that's safe and reliable.

I wear Birkenstocks because they last forever (I've had one of my pairs since the 90s). When I see other people wearing Birkenstocks, I think they value comfort and foot health and durability and longevity over fashion.

I bought my kid an LL Bean bookbag when he was born, because they last forever and I didn't want to waste money on a diaper bag. We used it as a diaper bag and now he uses it in elementary school. When I see other kids with LL Bean backpacks, I think their parents value longevity and simplicity and reasonable prices.

I buy Kirkland brand for a lot of stuff. When I see other people who buy Kirkland brand things, I think they value buying in bulk to save time and money.

We have a large veggie / fruit garden in our backyard. When I see other people who grow their own food, I think they value health, delicious produce, and saving money, maybe even decreasing carbon footprint, etc. I also think they have time and enjoy gardening.

Basically, the "status" symbols I think I display are those of someone who values reasonable judgement, safety, health, time, etc.

Yeah but even these "good value" things are class signifiers. There's so many articles out there about how expensive it is to be poor. You can't afford the LL Bean book bag so you get the cheaper bag, which means you have to replace it more often - but that's more manageable as a rolling expense than shelling out the $$ for the good bag in the first place. Same with a good car. And you need land to grow fruit and veggies - so having THAT is a class signifier (otherwise, you live in an apartment without your own outdoor space). Etc.

Not saying you do any of these things TO show off your class status, but they DO show off your class status all the same. We have a beat up 10 year old Kia Soul and I know when I look at people with clean, new-looking CRVs I definitely think: that person has some money. (That's probably going to be our next car, too.) But I also sort of think that when I see a well maintained older CRV - that the person had the money to buy it, and has the money to maintain it.

I think maybe you just never know who you're speaking to with these decisions and status announcements. To the people just like you - we're like you, too; just haven't bought the car yet - you're saying, "I'm one of you. Not showy but 'comfortable' and I value safety and value over flash (but that's a choice, not a necessity)."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:GPA helmet. Butet saddle.

I’m old, sorry. I know it’s new and different things now.

I prefer the Passier.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A family office.

/end of thread

It’s so good as a casual mention.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your white privilege is showing, OP.

shut up! Grow up! Stop - for the love of GOD - Stop!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:leather living room furniture designed by Le Corbousier

The LC3 Grand? I have that too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I definitely do this, but the "status" that I'm going for is not "rich."

For example, I bought a CRV because Hondas last forever and a CRV is a good family car. It has good safety ratings. When I see other people in CRVs I feel like they have similar values--they want a good deal that's safe and reliable.

I wear Birkenstocks because they last forever (I've had one of my pairs since the 90s). When I see other people wearing Birkenstocks, I think they value comfort and foot health and durability and longevity over fashion.

I bought my kid an LL Bean bookbag when he was born, because they last forever and I didn't want to waste money on a diaper bag. We used it as a diaper bag and now he uses it in elementary school. When I see other kids with LL Bean backpacks, I think their parents value longevity and simplicity and reasonable prices.

I buy Kirkland brand for a lot of stuff. When I see other people who buy Kirkland brand things, I think they value buying in bulk to save time and money.

We have a large veggie / fruit garden in our backyard. When I see other people who grow their own food, I think they value health, delicious produce, and saving money, maybe even decreasing carbon footprint, etc. I also think they have time and enjoy gardening.

Basically, the "status" symbols I think I display are those of someone who values reasonable judgement, safety, health, time, etc.

Yeah but even these "good value" things are class signifiers. There's so many articles out there about how expensive it is to be poor. You can't afford the LL Bean book bag so you get the cheaper bag, which means you have to replace it more often - but that's more manageable as a rolling expense than shelling out the $$ for the good bag in the first place. Same with a good car. And you need land to grow fruit and veggies - so having THAT is a class signifier (otherwise, you live in an apartment without your own outdoor space). Etc.

Not saying you do any of these things TO show off your class status, but they DO show off your class status all the same. We have a beat up 10 year old Kia Soul and I know when I look at people with clean, new-looking CRVs I definitely think: that person has some money. (That's probably going to be our next car, too.) But I also sort of think that when I see a well maintained older CRV - that the person had the money to buy it, and has the money to maintain it.

I think maybe you just never know who you're speaking to with these decisions and status announcements. To the people just like you - we're like you, too; just haven't bought the car yet - you're saying, "I'm one of you. Not showy but 'comfortable' and I value safety and value over flash (but that's a choice, not a necessity)."

I'm the PP you're quoting, and yes, exactly. That's exactly what I meant by my post.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I definitely do this, but the "status" that I'm going for is not "rich."

For example, I bought a CRV because Hondas last forever and a CRV is a good family car. It has good safety ratings. When I see other people in CRVs I feel like they have similar values--they want a good deal that's safe and reliable.

I wear Birkenstocks because they last forever (I've had one of my pairs since the 90s). When I see other people wearing Birkenstocks, I think they value comfort and foot health and durability and longevity over fashion.

I bought my kid an LL Bean bookbag when he was born, because they last forever and I didn't want to waste money on a diaper bag. We used it as a diaper bag and now he uses it in elementary school. When I see other kids with LL Bean backpacks, I think their parents value longevity and simplicity and reasonable prices.

I buy Kirkland brand for a lot of stuff. When I see other people who buy Kirkland brand things, I think they value buying in bulk to save time and money.

We have a large veggie / fruit garden in our backyard. When I see other people who grow their own food, I think they value health, delicious produce, and saving money, maybe even decreasing carbon footprint, etc. I also think they have time and enjoy gardening.

Basically, the "status" symbols I think I display are those of someone who values reasonable judgement, safety, health, time, etc.

Those aren't status symbols. I'm not sure why people have difficulty grasping the concept of status symbols, which is simply showing off your access to money and prestige, and therefore your own higher status in society. There is nothing complicated about the meaning.

No, PP is correct. Status does not merely apply to "shiny things". There is a whole subset of DCUM that lives like this, including me (not those specific brands, exactly, but similar). We could afford to buy more baubles, but we don't, because it's not in line with our values. While most of these people are not Old Money, they exercise a similar mindset, compared to New Money and ostentatious displays of wealth.

Sounds like people are redefining status symbol to feel better about themselves. Living virtuously isn't a status symbol. No one would argue being thrifty, modest, frugal and virtuous are status symbols. What you're really talking about are cultural cues, not status symbols.

Just google it. What's the first definition to come up?

a possession that is taken to indicate a person's wealth or high social or professional status. "the palace was built as a status symbol"

If still in doubt, here's a convenient link to Merriam Webster:
https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/status%20symbol

Definition of status symbol
: something (such as an expensive car) that a person owns and that shows wealth or a high social status

Being frugal isn't an indicator of wealth or high social or professional status. It's neither there nor there.

[Anonymous]

Some people on this thread just want to be argumentative and/or like to hear themselves talk