Career as a nurse -- DH has a prejudice against it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP and her DH have $1 million per year, can’t they help their daughter buy a home?

Uh, no. We make $300k/year and have 3 kids.

[Anonymous]

It kind of comes down to how much you guide your kids career choice. My 10 year old nephew wants to be a fire fighter and my 14 year dreams of broadway. I tell them they can be a volunteer firefights and do community theater — that is not a career path we will support.

Nursing seems to me to be more professional, but I didn’t realize the pay didn’t match the work/responsibility.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I find is weird that OP has decided that nursing must be a good gig and is determined to elicit responses that support her flawed hypothesis. Will you find nurses who say it’s been a good career path? I certainly hope so. But Personally, I couldn’t imagine pressuring my child to go into nursing after the last two years. I would be Encouraging professional careers that offer a path to work remotely.

Didn’t OP say her daughter WANTED to be a nurse but her dad/ OPs husband was actively discouraging it? I’m a nurse and I’ve had a varied career and I can’t imagine doing a different job. I was a hospital nurse for 5 years, then went back to school while working 2 shifts a week to become a nurse practitioner, and I’ve worked in a few roles as an NP (primary care for a few years, then in a pediatric cardiology specialty clinic, and now as a midlevel provider in the pediatric ER). Considering making a change when the kids are older to be an NP in the county school system. I like variety, I like working with people, and I like medicine and nursing is truly a perfect fit for me. My family is UMC in DC and I went to Brown undergrad before Johns Hopkins accelerated BSN nursing program once I graduated Brown (not sure if that program is still there). Only sharing this to point out that I clearly had other career options and my parents clearly had enough money to support me in my choice. This was truly my top choice.

So you make enough to buy your own home? That seems to be a sticky point for Op

I didn’t buy until I was married, but yes, most nurses are capable of owning their own homes, and certainly NPs who make 120-180k a year or so

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As an RN in California, I made over $100K a year with 8 years experience. After COVID I left and went into case management (100% telework) and still make $98000. Becoming a nurse was one of the best decisions I have made….

That's great, but as an attorney I make twice that after 3 years and I still work from home 100%. Which one is the better option for the OP?

Nursing. Doing the sort of law that lets you make twice that after three years, will ruin a lot of people's lives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I find is weird that OP has decided that nursing must be a good gig and is determined to elicit responses that support her flawed hypothesis. Will you find nurses who say it’s been a good career path? I certainly hope so. But Personally, I couldn’t imagine pressuring my child to go into nursing after the last two years. I would be Encouraging professional careers that offer a path to work remotely.

My cousin is a nursing case manager and seems to have a good gig. Another cousin is a nurse who worked from home processing medical claims. Seems super boring but if you want good money for WFH, there you go. I think as PPs are saying, one of the main issues is are you willing to put up with judgmental d*cks looking down on you for not being a doctor. If so, seems like you can build quite a nice life. If not, there you go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH grew up in a rural town where like the default path for a LOT of the women in his graduating class was to go into nursing. He wants to dissuade our DD from the field because he feels it is underpaid, over worked, and not given enough respect in the profession. He claims they barely break $100k, despite working long hard hours responsible dozens of patients.

My impression is that there is a nursing shortage, and I would expect salaries to rise to approach $150k or so, a solid professional salary. And if you go into a specialty, like CNP or CNA you can break $200k riveling pediatricans and internist salaries.

Love to hear stories of nurse careers to balance out my DH's long list of RNs scrapping by in rural Georgia!

He's probably speaking out of observation, especially now that covid is around. I, too, am seeing high burnout not in rural GA. It doesn't matter if he is right, at 18 she has the right to do whatever she wants, so long as she takes out her own loan. He has the right to tell her about his classmates and you have the right to spout off stories from the internet.

I actually think your husband is awesome for introducing her to real-life mentors or BeenThereDoneThat scenarios. I think Take your child to work day should have an additional spin-off where 15-year-olds don't have to go to mom or dad's but rather can pick a professional and spend a day with them. Then when they are 16, they have someone to ask for an internship or can go the opposite way. Take your child to work has become "Family Day"/on-site daycare with coloring and games for kids too young to be thinking about internships, but is still valuable to understand what mommy and daddy do when they are gone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As an RN in California, I made over $100K a year with 8 years experience. After COVID I left and went into case management (100% telework) and still make $98000. Becoming a nurse was one of the best decisions I have made….

That's great, but as an attorney I make twice that after 3 years and I still work from home 100%. Which one is the better option for the OP?

Nursing. Doing the sort of law that lets you make twice that after three years, will ruin a lot of people's lives.

So, what's your point?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As an RN in California, I made over $100K a year with 8 years experience. After COVID I left and went into case management (100% telework) and still make $98000. Becoming a nurse was one of the best decisions I have made….

That's great, but as an attorney I make twice that after 3 years and I still work from home 100%. Which one is the better option for the OP?

Nursing. Doing the sort of law that lets you make twice that after three years, will ruin a lot of people's lives.

So, what's your point?

My point is that however much money you made as a baby lawyer, it's a terrible career path for a lot of people. And VERY expensive to get there. Nursing seems like a better choice for many people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As an RN in California, I made over $100K a year with 8 years experience. After COVID I left and went into case management (100% telework) and still make $98000. Becoming a nurse was one of the best decisions I have made….

That's great, but as an attorney I make twice that after 3 years and I still work from home 100%. Which one is the better option for the OP?

Nursing. Doing the sort of law that lets you make twice that after three years, will ruin a lot of people's lives.

So, what's your point?

My point is that however much money you made as a baby lawyer, it's a terrible career path for a lot of people. And VERY expensive to get there. Nursing seems like a better choice for many people.

I think what some of the PPs have been trying to say though is that nursing is a terrible choice long term because of the backbreaking work and relatively low pay. As a PP pointed out, $100k in CA ain't much, and that was only after 8 years of changing bedpans, doing the dirty grunt work that doctors don't do, etc. In the long run, a white collar profession is better, whether lawyer, engineer, doctor, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As an RN in California, I made over $100K a year with 8 years experience. After COVID I left and went into case management (100% telework) and still make $98000. Becoming a nurse was one of the best decisions I have made….

That's great, but as an attorney I make twice that after 3 years and I still work from home 100%. Which one is the better option for the OP?

Nursing. Doing the sort of law that lets you make twice that after three years, will ruin a lot of people's lives.

So, what's your point?

My point is that however much money you made as a baby lawyer, it's a terrible career path for a lot of people. And VERY expensive to get there. Nursing seems like a better choice for many people.

I think what some of the PPs have been trying to say though is that nursing is a terrible choice long term because of the backbreaking work and relatively low pay. As a PP pointed out, $100k in CA ain't much, and that was only after 8 years of changing bedpans, doing the dirty grunt work that doctors don't do, etc. In the long run, a white collar profession is better, whether lawyer, engineer, doctor, etc.

You've said "changing bedpans" a few times, so, just to clarify, those are nursing aides or nursing assistants that do that in most cases. And on the occasion the nurse does it- it's to help care for the patient. You should hope you have a compassionate nurse when you're bedridden who will change your bedpan when the nursing aide is busy elsewhere.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As an RN in California, I made over $100K a year with 8 years experience. After COVID I left and went into case management (100% telework) and still make $98000. Becoming a nurse was one of the best decisions I have made….

That's great, but as an attorney I make twice that after 3 years and I still work from home 100%. Which one is the better option for the OP?

Nursing. Doing the sort of law that lets you make twice that after three years, will ruin a lot of people's lives.

So, what's your point?

My point is that however much money you made as a baby lawyer, it's a terrible career path for a lot of people. And VERY expensive to get there. Nursing seems like a better choice for many people.

I think what some of the PPs have been trying to say though is that nursing is a terrible choice long term because of the backbreaking work and relatively low pay. As a PP pointed out, $100k in CA ain't much, and that was only after 8 years of changing bedpans, doing the dirty grunt work that doctors don't do, etc. In the long run, a white collar profession is better, whether lawyer, engineer, doctor, etc.

A doctor who is too good to help change the occasional bed pan is not a good doctor.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It kind of comes down to how much you guide your kids career choice. My 10 year old nephew wants to be a fire fighter and my 14 year dreams of broadway. I tell them they can be a volunteer firefights and do community theater — that is not a career path we will support.

Nursing seems to me to be more professional, but I didn’t realize the pay didn’t match the work/responsibility.

Whats wrong with being a professional firefighter? They have decent pay, good job stability, and usually great benefits. And I'd certainly would encourage my DD to do that than to pursue, for example, a liberal arts tenure track position.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As an RN in California, I made over $100K a year with 8 years experience. After COVID I left and went into case management (100% telework) and still make $98000. Becoming a nurse was one of the best decisions I have made….

That's great, but as an attorney I make twice that after 3 years and I still work from home 100%. Which one is the better option for the OP?

Nursing. Doing the sort of law that lets you make twice that after three years, will ruin a lot of people's lives.

So, what's your point?

My point is that however much money you made as a baby lawyer, it's a terrible career path for a lot of people. And VERY expensive to get there. Nursing seems like a better choice for many people.

I think what some of the PPs have been trying to say though is that nursing is a terrible choice long term because of the backbreaking work and relatively low pay. As a PP pointed out, $100k in CA ain't much, and that was only after 8 years of changing bedpans, doing the dirty grunt work that doctors don't do, etc. In the long run, a white collar profession is better, whether lawyer, engineer, doctor, etc.

Except:

$100k is objectively a good salary for most people. It's just in DCUM land that you'd wear a hair shirt over having to live on low six figures. Especially for a single person!

You are really presenting a narrow view of the profession. As many have said, there's a lot that nurses can do other than empty bedpans. Many nursing jobs are hard on your feet - just like many doctor jobs are hard on your feet. But I am the cousin who is a case manager. She's not on her feet. She's at a desk. And many other people would rather be doing an active job than sitting at a desk all day.

Saying that nursing isn't white collar is really just leaning into the OP DH's initial prejudice. It's a well paid job offering a lot of opportunity and variety, that you don't need to go deep into debt to pursue. By the way, did you know that most lawyers are earning far less than $100k? The PP who earned $300k in their third year of lawyering is an exception. Most lawyers aren't fancy like that - and even the ones who are, are largely miserable.

I just don't see the reason to discourage someone from pursuing nursing if they think it would be a good match for their interests, talents, and goals. Other than... weird prejudice. Which I think is a very harmful and self-defeating approach.

You can always retrain to be something else later on if you want, too. If 20 years into nursing you decide that you really should have been a lawyer - guess what, law school's still there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It kind of comes down to how much you guide your kids career choice. My 10 year old nephew wants to be a fire fighter and my 14 year dreams of broadway. I tell them they can be a volunteer firefights and do community theater — that is not a career path we will support.

Nursing seems to me to be more professional, but I didn’t realize the pay didn’t match the work/responsibility.

wow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It kind of comes down to how much you guide your kids career choice. My 10 year old nephew wants to be a fire fighter and my 14 year dreams of broadway. I tell them they can be a volunteer firefights and do community theater — that is not a career path we will support.

Nursing seems to me to be more professional, but I didn’t realize the pay didn’t match the work/responsibility.

Whats wrong with being a professional firefighter? They have decent pay, good job stability, and usually great benefits. And I'd certainly would encourage my DD to do that than to pursue, for example, a liberal arts tenure track position.

NP and I think the odds of getting a paid firefighting position (other than fed firefighters whose pay sucks) are very slim. Those are very competitive positions and you've got all the volunteer firefighters who have been to all of the fire schools competing with you for those few paid positions.