Unwed single parents - Documentation for foreign travel

[Anonymous]

I have a child and was never married to the father, but he is listed on the birth certificate. By his choice he has very little contact with my child, 1-2x per year. He never calls my child, never answers the phone if my young child calls him. Other than the court ordered child support, he doesn't provide or buy anything for my child. My child has the father's last name. I have a child support order in place naming me as the custodial parent. The father and I have never been to court for custody issues, and he has never filed for custody or anything.

In my state, if the couple is not married when the child is born, all parental rights go to the mother. The father has to file for legitimation, and then file for visitation and custody rights if he wants any of that. My child's father has done none of this, so per our state law he has no parental rights to my child.

I put all this on my child's passport application, and he was granted the passport with no problem. So now I'm researching travel to Canada, Costa Rica, Mexico and Europe, and people are mentioning difficulty getting on planes or through customs if they don't have a letter from the other parent granting authorization to travel with the child alone. I will not have such a letter, it is impossible to get from my child's father, and such a letter was not even necessary to get the actual passport.

When we travel, I will not have a court order showing custody, nor a letter from the other parent granting travel. So my question is what documentation will suffice for this situation? Has anyone else dealt with this? Should I just carry all the documentation I used for the passport app?

Also, are their any countries where I won't even be asked for this stuff?

I appreciate any insight you all can provide, thank you.

[Anonymous]

My SIL has a similar set up. I also doubt she's even thought twice about traveling internationally with her daughter. The dad is so far removed from her thinking she'd never even consider getting these things. He's never had any sort of custody and does not pay child support.

She's been to Mexico and all over Europe with her. No issues.

Do you have the same last name?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a child and was never married to the father, but he is listed on the birth certificate. By his choice he has very little contact with my child, 1-2x per year. He never calls my child, never answers the phone if my young child calls him. Other than the court ordered child support, he doesn't provide or buy anything for my child. My child has the father's last name. I have a child support order in place naming me as the custodial parent. The father and I have never been to court for custody issues, and he has never filed for custody or anything.

In my state, if the couple is not married when the child is born, all parental rights go to the mother. The father has to file for legitimation, and then file for visitation and custody rights if he wants any of that. My child's father has done none of this, so per our state law he has no parental rights to my child.

I put all this on my child's passport application, and he was granted the passport with no problem. So now I'm researching travel to Canada, Costa Rica, Mexico and Europe, and people are mentioning difficulty getting on planes or through customs if they don't have a letter from the other parent granting authorization to travel with the child alone. I will not have such a letter, it is impossible to get from my child's father, and such a letter was not even necessary to get the actual passport.

When we travel, I will not have a court order showing custody, nor a letter from the other parent granting travel. So my question is what documentation will suffice for this situation? Has anyone else dealt with this? Should I just carry all the documentation I used for the passport app?

Also, are their any countries where I won't even be asked for this stuff?

I appreciate any insight you all can provide, thank you.

You really need to talk to a lawyer who specializes in custody matters and hopefully has some knowledge about travel relating to custody matters. This board can be helpful with certain things, and might even point towards a good attorney, but I wouldn't count on anything said here with something this important and potentially costly.

[Anonymous]

I have flown on a dozen international trips with my kids from DC, CA, and NY - starting when they were 12 mos old - and not once have I been asked to see a letter from their father. He took them once from NY and wasn’t asked for a letter either. I have a different last name.

[Anonymous]

You should really get the court order. Why haven’t you? This is what my sister got for her international travel day Even though she had full legal custody in the state. Other countries don’t care about your states laws.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My SIL has a similar set up. I also doubt she's even thought twice about traveling internationally with her daughter. The dad is so far removed from her thinking she'd never even consider getting these things. He's never had any sort of custody and does not pay child support.

She's been to Mexico and all over Europe with her. No issues.

Do you have the same last name?

"My child has the father's last name"

[Anonymous]

I'm in the same situation however the only way I could get a passport for my child was with a form filled out and notarized by my ex. I wouldn't chance being refused boarding on an international flight without a letter. Why can't you ask the father for such a letter?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My SIL has a similar set up. I also doubt she's even thought twice about traveling internationally with her daughter. The dad is so far removed from her thinking she'd never even consider getting these things. He's never had any sort of custody and does not pay child support.

She's been to Mexico and all over Europe with her. No issues.

Do you have the same last name?

We do not have the same last name. He has his father's last name.

[Anonymous]

Canada is super strict. Call their embassy and speak to the consulate.

[Anonymous]

I've spoken with three attorneys and they all said that since I have all parental rights that no documentation is needed. When I've asked about getting a court order to apply for the passport and for travel, they said it is unnecessary because I already have sole legal and physical custody per state law. They said I would be spending money and time for what could turn into a custody battle.

That is definitely not the direction I'm trying to go. I just want to be able to travel internationally with my child with no issues.

I'd appreciate hearing from other parents in a similar situation who have traveled internationally recently, thank you.

[Anonymous]

I don't think foreign governments care about state laws. You child's father is named on his birth certificate therefore you will need his permission to travel outside of the US with the child. Some countries are stricter than others.

[Anonymous]

Also, regarding just asking the father to sign a letter, he's not compliant. I asked him several times, kindly, to help us apply for the passport and he ignored us. He doesn't want to be in my child's life or help him with anything.

If we don't need anything from him in order to travel out of the country, then I'm not involving him. We got the passport without him, so that's one major hurdle overcome.

[Anonymous]

For the people commenting on the letter required, are you speaking from actual experience of having actually been asked for such a letter? If not, then your reply is not helpful to this situation.

I don't need to hear peoples ideas of what they "think" is necessary. I need to hear what people have actually experienced. That is more helpful to me than throwing out blanket statements when you aren't familiar with the intricacies of the issue. Thanks.

[Anonymous]

What documentation do you have showing that you have full legal and physical custody? I would be sure to travel with that. And if you don't have such documentation you should go back to court to get it because you might need it in the future (ie for major medical decisions).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm in the same situation however the only way I could get a passport for my child was with a form filled out and notarized by my ex. I wouldn't chance being refused boarding on an international flight without a letter. Why can't you ask the father for such a letter?

+1 Get a letter. You may not have trouble this time or the next 10 times, but why worry about it and let it potentially wreck some future plans when it can be easily prevented?