Unwed single parents - Documentation for foreign travel

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous]Definitely take a notarized letter. You never know who is working the passport desk- some are lenient and some are not. Also, each country has different rules. I have had to show a letter many times. Dont go without it. Passport control doesn't care if dad is involved or not with child's life. Their job is to prevent kidnapping and human trafficking. They need to check their boxes.[/quote]

I don't see how a notarized letter can prevent all of these ridiculous situations people bring up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've spoken with three attorneys and they all said that since I have all parental rights that no documentation is needed. When I've asked about getting a court order to apply for the passport and for travel, they said it is unnecessary because I already have sole legal and physical custody per state law. They said I would be spending money and time for what could turn into a custody battle.

That is definitely not the direction I'm trying to go. I just want to be able to travel internationally with my child with no issues.

I'd appreciate hearing from other parents in a similar situation who have traveled internationally recently, thank you.

Stepmother here and we always had a letter from my stepson’s mother when traveling internationally. We were never asked for it but we were traveling as me, my husband, and my stepson all with the same last name so we appeared differently than a solo parent. You will arise different scrutiny - maybe not to every country and maybe not on every trip but you won’t know which until it’s too late and you get stuck. Get some documentation. If you’ve talked to 3 attorneys why can’t one give you something? Or help you file to get what you need? It’s not a crazy scenario; it’s to prevent very real (and often heartbreaking) scenarios. Think of it the other way - would you like your child’s sperm donor being able to take him to any country without your knowledge? Probably not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She wrote that she will not have documentation showing that she is the sole parent.

"When we travel, I will not have a court order showing custody, nor a letter from the other parent granting travel."

She can get it if she wants it. It is a court proceeding and there’s absolutely nothing stopping her from going this route with or without the support of the father.

Completely off topic, but I would also petition to get the child’s last name changed to mine. Why strap the kid with a daily reminder of his deadbeat father?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

She can get it if she wants it. It is a court proceeding and there’s absolutely nothing stopping her from going this route with or without the support of the father.

Completely off topic, but I would also petition to get the child’s last name changed to mine. Why strap the kid with a daily reminder of his deadbeat father?!

+1 to all of this

[Anonymous]

Single parent, no dad on birth certificate (or in our lives). I have taken DD to Mexico, the UK and France multiple times, and have never been asked to demonstrate there is no other parent. Good to know re: Canada, since we are headed there this summer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Single parent, no dad on birth certificate (or in our lives). I have taken DD to Mexico, the UK and France multiple times, and have never been asked to demonstrate there is no other parent. Good to know re: Canada, since we are headed there this summer.

This is a different situation than the OP. Her baby daddy is on the birth certificate. Apples and oranges.

[Anonymous]

OP start here. The requirements and customs of each country will be different.

Canada: https://travel.state.gov/content/travel/en/international-travel/International-Travel-Country-Information-Pages/Canada.html

Costa Rica: https://travel.state.gov/content/travel/en/international-travel/International-Travel-Country-Information-Pages/CostaRica.html

Schengen agreement countries:
https://travel.state.gov/content/travel/en/international-travel/before-you-go/schengen.html

[Anonymous]

Reread the court order on child support. In that order it should state that you have sole physical and sole legal custody. Bring a copy of that document.

[Anonymous]

OP, it is probably worth going through the legal process to get written proof that the father has given up full parental and custodial rights to yourself.

It was a grave mistake on your part to list a disinterested, uninvolved father you are not married to on your child’s birth certificate - and you’ll run into problems not only for travel but also with school admissions and medical issues.

If at all possible to reverse this you should do so.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, it is probably worth going through the legal process to get written proof that the father has given up full parental and custodial rights to yourself.

It was a grave mistake on your part to list a disinterested, uninvolved father you are not married to on your child’s birth certificate - and you’ll run into problems not only for travel but also with school admissions and medical issues.

If at all possible to reverse this you should do so.

It made getting FA for college very difficult for my cousin’s daughter.

[Anonymous]

OP here. The father and I were engaged to be married when my child was born. We were engaged and planning the wedding for several months before I became pregnant. Hence, the father was listed on the birth certificate and my child was given the father’s last name. A year after my child was born, the father became physically abusive and I decided to end the engagement.

For the first couple years of my child’s life his father was an interested and involved parent. Then he decided not to be and it has been that way since.

I have no plans to change my child’s last name as he likes it. I asked if he’d like to be changed to my last name and he said no thank you. I respect his wishes.

Has anyone traveled alone with their children recently to any countries that have not asked for this notarized letter? I will simply avoid problematic countries for now. Canada is off the list until later when the letter won’t be an issue.

Also does the child’s age make a difference? My child is not a little tiny kid. He’s a growing preteen young man, almost as tall as I am.

[Anonymous]

In my experience it's easier traveling in Latin America without notarized permission from the other parent. It's stricter in Canada and Africa, I believe.