Redshirting consequences at Lafayette

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DC lottery just sent a real nasty email to parents of kids on the waitlist with birthdays before Sept 30 for Kindergarten pulling them off waitlists for all DCPS schools.

Way more antagonistic than the way they've dealt with this in the past, which was to let the schools handle it individually.

Super aggressive move.

Really feel for families moving to DC from another area, from abroad, from the neighborhoods in Maryland and Virginia right next door....sheesh.

That’s appropriate as they are clear on their expectations. For sn kids, sure, but these kids are not sn.

[Anonymous]

Per chat gbt.

The practice of delaying kindergarten entry, commonly known as "redshirting," is more prevalent among affluent families, particularly in private school settings. Here's a breakdown based on available data[Wikipedia][1])

---

### 📊 Redshirting Rates by Socioeconomic Status

* **National Average**: Approximately 4% to 5.5% of children delay kindergarten entry nationwide. ([Phys.org][2])

* **By Income**:

* Children from the wealthiest families (top income quintile) have a redshirting rate of about 6.4%.
* In contrast, children from the poorest families (bottom income quintile) have a redshirting rate of approximately 2.3%. ([The Washington Post][3])

* **By Race**:

* Nearly 6% of white children are redshirted.
* Less than 1% of Black children are redshirted.
* Approximately 2% or less of Hispanic and Asian children are redshirted. ([UVA Today][4], [Brookings][5])

---

### 🏫 Public vs. Private School Trends

* **Private Schools**: Redshirting is notably more common in elite private schools. For instance, at a prestigious East Coast private K–12 school, about 30% of boys were born before the school's cutoff date, suggesting intentional redshirting practices. ([Brookings][6])

* **Public Schools**: While specific national data on redshirting in public schools is limited, the practice is generally less prevalent compared to private institutions. However, in affluent public school districts, redshirting rates can be higher. For example, in Howard County, Maryland, which has a median household income of \$140,971, approximately 2.5% of families waive kindergarten each year. ([The Baltimore Banner][7])

---

### 🧒 Gender and Birth Month Factors

* **Gender**: Boys are more likely to be redshirted than girls. In the 2010–11 kindergarten class, 7.3% of boys were redshirted compared to 5.2% of girls. ([Wikipedia][1], [Brookings][6])

* **Birth Month**: Children born in the summer months, especially those with birthdays close to the school cutoff dates, are more frequently redshirted. For example, one in five summer-born boys with college-educated parents were redshirted. ([Brookings][5], [Brookings][6])

---

### 💡 Summary

Redshirting is a practice more commonly adopted by affluent families, particularly in private school settings, and is influenced by factors such as socioeconomic status, race, gender, and birth month. While the national average for redshirting is relatively low, certain communities and demographics exhibit significantly higher rates.

---

[1]: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Redshirting_%28academic%29?utm_source=chatgpt.com "Redshirting (academic)"
[2]: https://phys.org/news/2013-04-redshirting-kindergarteners-common.html?utm_source=chatgpt.com "'Redshirting' kindergarteners not as common as reported"
[3]: https://www.washingtonpost.com/local/education/study-kindergarten-redshirting-less-common-than-previously-reported/2013/09/16/080794ea-1c9d-11e3-8685-5021e0c41964_story.html?utm_source=chatgpt.com "Study: Kindergarten ‘redshirting’ less common than previously reported - The Washington Post"
[4]: https://news.virginia.edu/content/study-redshirting-kindergarteners-not-common-reported?utm_source=chatgpt.com "Study: ‘Redshirting’ Kindergarteners Not as Common as Reported | UVA Today"
[5]: https://www.brookings.edu/articles/how-much-does-it-benefit-a-child-to-delay-kindergarten-entry-for-a-year/?utm_source=chatgpt.com "How much does it benefit a child to delay kindergarten entry for a year?"
[6]: https://www.brookings.edu/articles/who-redshirts/?utm_source=chatgpt.com "Who redshirts?"
[7]: https://www.thebaltimorebanner.com/education/early-childhood/maryland-redshirting-kindergarten-E3477RWX6ZA7HHBSY3J3UD7IEU/?utm_source=chatgpt.com "Redshirting in kindergarten: What parents in Maryland need to know - The Baltimore Banner"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree that some of these posters show troubling mental health signs. Really surprised the lack of boundary awareness. We are talking about kids here and people are speculating wildly about special needs, IEP, what was approved, with absolutely no shred of evidence. Ultimately that’s a private matter, leave it to the school and parents.

The comments about taking pleasure in someone’s (a child, none the less!) misfortune were truly repugnant. You’ve got to have a massive chip on your shoulder to stoop so low.

The competition these parents imagine themselves to be in is truly disturbing. The kid starting kindergarten later won’t steal anyone spot at a coveted college or a job later on, life is not that deterministic.

Also the strident chest beating about how great of a mother a poster is for taking care of her special needs child, and judging everyone else by how they compare against how much she did for her kid. Are we competing on who sacrificed most for their kids now? That’s what it seems. The bragging and inquiring about whose kid is more advanced in math, that’s a whole next level of insane competitiveness.

Unfortunately these harpies are lost, there’s no relief in sight, because they think of themselves as heroine mothers and models to follow, the very voice of common sense.

Lol no. The issue is an entitled set of NW moms taking up ALL the air in the room to get their own way. That’s no way to run a school system and we have seen very recent examples of where catering to a coterie of “concerned moms” was disastrous.

Yes this. All of the opposition is because people who think rules don't apply to them are grating. But then the UNW moms create a bunch of straw man arguments and vehemently defend them. That feels like 50 percent of this thread now.

I know! The other 50% is “look how much I did for my child, why can’t you do the same?”

In short, striver mom gets her ivy (lol) hopes high when her kid is taking calculus in 10th grade, only to see them shattered by actual college admission results. Meanwhile, lower “stats” kid gets into UVA. Initially she can’t even comprehend it, but it finally dawn on her, the kid was redshirted, an unfair advantage that negated all her hard work throughout the years. All that kindergarten reading, the algebra in 6th, the tutoring, it was for nothing because her kid was the youngest in the grade, a massive handicap to those in the know.

So she does what any rational person would do, troll internet posting boards, seeking validation of her parenting skill and spewing venom on redshirted kids and their parents. It’s really cathartic at the end of the day, and much cheaper than therapy. Not as effective though, her rants are getting more and more unhinged.

This is a perfect example of a straw man argument . Thank you!

But you’ve been so forthcoming with sharing personal details in your life especially about giving parents advice on how to raise their kids.

For real though, what college did your kid go to? Because with all the advice you’re dishing out, forgive me, but I want to make sure you’re legit and the final outcome is worthy of paying attention to you. If it’s below William and Mary don’t say anything, we get it, I won’t push it further and you have my sympathy.

My kids are not in college yet but it’s clear you held back to game the system. You did it for your ego vs your kids. I could not care less the ranking and hope mine go to an affordable school so we can pay for college and grad school. Except in a few fields no one cares about rankings except someone like you.

You just proved the point we are making about people like you who are gaming the system. I feel for your kids given how competitive you are.

Why is it gaming the system to hold back a kid until he’s ready to enter kindergarten?

Don’t you want all the kids to do well?

Because they are bigger, stronger, taller, faster, start puberty early for their grade and have more developed brains than the age level kids in their grades. Those factors impact almost everything.

The physical traits only matter in sports and those are by age. The intellectual abilities are not as connected to age and more with learning.

I don’t believe it’s an advantage, but if you believe those things, why didn’t you redshirt you kid? I still don’t understand what the issue is if some parents want to advantage their kids and send them later. We don’t blink an eye at tutors and expensive private schools.

Some sports have ethical policies that go by age not grade, to prevent this nonsense. I have smart kids, good IQ's and we prepared them academically and support as needed. Maybe if you tried that....

He does great academically even without me putting a lot of effort into it. With my career I wouldn’t have the time anyways. He has always been more independent and mature compared to other kids. Based on grades, AP scores and extracurriculars (captain of the varsity swim team) we’re targeting top schools.

Where does your kid go? If it’s around Boston they might end up close, fingers crossed!

This is a pretty typical profile. The more you post, the more you look silly as no reason to hold back. How do they do swimming outside hs where it is age based? How do they just have hs swim as an extra curricular. That’s only like three months out of the year. Funny how competitive you are. It’s sad you admit you put no effort in and your career comes first. He isn’t more mature or independent. He’s one to two years older so he’s equal or less due to the age gap. I feel bad for kids like yours where parents have all kinds of d of priorities that aren’t their kids being first. You held back for you, not him.

Don’t tell me how to raise my child I won’t tell you how to raise yours. Same with family priorities.

Really don’t get what your beef is or why you feel bad. How was that a “bad” outcome for the child? The kid turned out fine, maybe it would have been fine either way. If anything it is an indication that redshirting is not detrimental. In the end it’s a smart kid, doing great academically and socially that has a bright future ahead. That’s the dream of every parent. Mission accomplished, moving on to the next chapter in life.

You aren’t raising your kid. You are too busy with your career. These kids are not smarter and brighter nor more mature. They are with younger peers so you need to put them with age appropriate peers to compare. They may not survive in college never having to work hard or be challenged.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree that some of these posters show troubling mental health signs. Really surprised the lack of boundary awareness. We are talking about kids here and people are speculating wildly about special needs, IEP, what was approved, with absolutely no shred of evidence. Ultimately that’s a private matter, leave it to the school and parents.

The comments about taking pleasure in someone’s (a child, none the less!) misfortune were truly repugnant. You’ve got to have a massive chip on your shoulder to stoop so low.

The competition these parents imagine themselves to be in is truly disturbing. The kid starting kindergarten later won’t steal anyone spot at a coveted college or a job later on, life is not that deterministic.

Also the strident chest beating about how great of a mother a poster is for taking care of her special needs child, and judging everyone else by how they compare against how much she did for her kid. Are we competing on who sacrificed most for their kids now? That’s what it seems. The bragging and inquiring about whose kid is more advanced in math, that’s a whole next level of insane competitiveness.

Unfortunately these harpies are lost, there’s no relief in sight, because they think of themselves as heroine mothers and models to follow, the very voice of common sense.

Lol no. The issue is an entitled set of NW moms taking up ALL the air in the room to get their own way. That’s no way to run a school system and we have seen very recent examples of where catering to a coterie of “concerned moms” was disastrous.

Yes this. All of the opposition is because people who think rules don't apply to them are grating. But then the UNW moms create a bunch of straw man arguments and vehemently defend them. That feels like 50 percent of this thread now.

I know! The other 50% is “look how much I did for my child, why can’t you do the same?”

In short, striver mom gets her ivy (lol) hopes high when her kid is taking calculus in 10th grade, only to see them shattered by actual college admission results. Meanwhile, lower “stats” kid gets into UVA. Initially she can’t even comprehend it, but it finally dawn on her, the kid was redshirted, an unfair advantage that negated all her hard work throughout the years. All that kindergarten reading, the algebra in 6th, the tutoring, it was for nothing because her kid was the youngest in the grade, a massive handicap to those in the know.

So she does what any rational person would do, troll internet posting boards, seeking validation of her parenting skill and spewing venom on redshirted kids and their parents. It’s really cathartic at the end of the day, and much cheaper than therapy. Not as effective though, her rants are getting more and more unhinged.

This is a perfect example of a straw man argument . Thank you!

But you’ve been so forthcoming with sharing personal details in your life especially about giving parents advice on how to raise their kids.

For real though, what college did your kid go to? Because with all the advice you’re dishing out, forgive me, but I want to make sure you’re legit and the final outcome is worthy of paying attention to you. If it’s below William and Mary don’t say anything, we get it, I won’t push it further and you have my sympathy.

My kids are not in college yet but it’s clear you held back to game the system. You did it for your ego vs your kids. I could not care less the ranking and hope mine go to an affordable school so we can pay for college and grad school. Except in a few fields no one cares about rankings except someone like you.

You just proved the point we are making about people like you who are gaming the system. I feel for your kids given how competitive you are.

Why is it gaming the system to hold back a kid until he’s ready to enter kindergarten?

Don’t you want all the kids to do well?

Because they are bigger, stronger, taller, faster, start puberty early for their grade and have more developed brains than the age level kids in their grades. Those factors impact almost everything.

The physical traits only matter in sports and those are by age. The intellectual abilities are not as connected to age and more with learning.

I don’t believe it’s an advantage, but if you believe those things, why didn’t you redshirt you kid? I still don’t understand what the issue is if some parents want to advantage their kids and send them later. We don’t blink an eye at tutors and expensive private schools.

So, why did you hold back? No, intellectual abilities are partly due to IQ, partly hard work, baring any sn or learning disabilities. Older doesn't make you smarter or more intellectual. It makes you less intellectual as you are not with true peers and with younger peers with lower expectations. When expectations are lowered that's not smarter, that's gaming the system.

One of my kids is very short regardless. At 17 they are still very short. Should I have held them back 3-4 years to hope they'd grow more?

Some of us put a lot of effort into our children’s nutrition, I wonder why you couldn’t do the same, it’s not that hard. When they were young it was like a had another extra job making sure they always had home cooked nutritious meals. They’ve never had junk food or sugary drinks!

Consult with their pediatrician, we were advised three servings of dairy per day, and make sure they eat about 1 gram of protein a day per pound of body weight. That’s a lot of meat, eggs, fish. Don’t even think about restricting food amounts if it’s clean, teenager boys eat a lot! In 6th grade my kid grew from 5’1” to 5’6”, it was crazy to watch.

My kid doesn’t drink juice or any bad drinks and just milk and water. Of course we all cook. Even pack every school lunch. That has nothing to do with height. It is genetics.

Since you put so much effort into food, why didn’t you put the same into academics and extracurricular activities?

Maybe the issue is that the food does not taste good. Do they say they like it, see them eating it, or maybe throwing away secretly? Cook fresh instead of doing a large batch for the week. Only saying it because that’s what I did as a child and the portions were often too small. I was very skinny.

If the child is in the bottom 20 percentile of height, I’d look first at nutrition, especially if it’s a boy. Talk to an endocrinologist, do regular checkups, tell your concerns to the pediatrician. The “genetics” you’re talking about may be human growth hormone deficiency which is treatable.

Last, spend less time on forums biatching about redshirted kids and more on your child who seems to be in a state at terrible neglect.

Oh honey, the food is good and they eat no issue. They eat four meals a day. I don’t cook large batches. You cannot change genetics. I’m not giving my child artificial hormones that can cause other issues later in life. Your projecting. Maybe if you put half as much time into supporting your child’s education they could have gone on time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree that some of these posters show troubling mental health signs. Really surprised the lack of boundary awareness. We are talking about kids here and people are speculating wildly about special needs, IEP, what was approved, with absolutely no shred of evidence. Ultimately that’s a private matter, leave it to the school and parents.

The comments about taking pleasure in someone’s (a child, none the less!) misfortune were truly repugnant. You’ve got to have a massive chip on your shoulder to stoop so low.

The competition these parents imagine themselves to be in is truly disturbing. The kid starting kindergarten later won’t steal anyone spot at a coveted college or a job later on, life is not that deterministic.

Also the strident chest beating about how great of a mother a poster is for taking care of her special needs child, and judging everyone else by how they compare against how much she did for her kid. Are we competing on who sacrificed most for their kids now? That’s what it seems. The bragging and inquiring about whose kid is more advanced in math, that’s a whole next level of insane competitiveness.

Unfortunately these harpies are lost, there’s no relief in sight, because they think of themselves as heroine mothers and models to follow, the very voice of common sense.

Lol no. The issue is an entitled set of NW moms taking up ALL the air in the room to get their own way. That’s no way to run a school system and we have seen very recent examples of where catering to a coterie of “concerned moms” was disastrous.

Yes this. All of the opposition is because people who think rules don't apply to them are grating. But then the UNW moms create a bunch of straw man arguments and vehemently defend them. That feels like 50 percent of this thread now.

I know! The other 50% is “look how much I did for my child, why can’t you do the same?”

In short, striver mom gets her ivy (lol) hopes high when her kid is taking calculus in 10th grade, only to see them shattered by actual college admission results. Meanwhile, lower “stats” kid gets into UVA. Initially she can’t even comprehend it, but it finally dawn on her, the kid was redshirted, an unfair advantage that negated all her hard work throughout the years. All that kindergarten reading, the algebra in 6th, the tutoring, it was for nothing because her kid was the youngest in the grade, a massive handicap to those in the know.

So she does what any rational person would do, troll internet posting boards, seeking validation of her parenting skill and spewing venom on redshirted kids and their parents. It’s really cathartic at the end of the day, and much cheaper than therapy. Not as effective though, her rants are getting more and more unhinged.

This is a perfect example of a straw man argument . Thank you!

But you’ve been so forthcoming with sharing personal details in your life especially about giving parents advice on how to raise their kids.

For real though, what college did your kid go to? Because with all the advice you’re dishing out, forgive me, but I want to make sure you’re legit and the final outcome is worthy of paying attention to you. If it’s below William and Mary don’t say anything, we get it, I won’t push it further and you have my sympathy.

My kids are not in college yet but it’s clear you held back to game the system. You did it for your ego vs your kids. I could not care less the ranking and hope mine go to an affordable school so we can pay for college and grad school. Except in a few fields no one cares about rankings except someone like you.

You just proved the point we are making about people like you who are gaming the system. I feel for your kids given how competitive you are.

Why is it gaming the system to hold back a kid until he’s ready to enter kindergarten?

Don’t you want all the kids to do well?

Because they are bigger, stronger, taller, faster, start puberty early for their grade and have more developed brains than the age level kids in their grades. Those factors impact almost everything.

The physical traits only matter in sports and those are by age. The intellectual abilities are not as connected to age and more with learning.

I don’t believe it’s an advantage, but if you believe those things, why didn’t you redshirt you kid? I still don’t understand what the issue is if some parents want to advantage their kids and send them later. We don’t blink an eye at tutors and expensive private schools.

So, why did you hold back? No, intellectual abilities are partly due to IQ, partly hard work, baring any sn or learning disabilities. Older doesn't make you smarter or more intellectual. It makes you less intellectual as you are not with true peers and with younger peers with lower expectations. When expectations are lowered that's not smarter, that's gaming the system.

One of my kids is very short regardless. At 17 they are still very short. Should I have held them back 3-4 years to hope they'd grow more?

Some of us put a lot of effort into our children’s nutrition, I wonder why you couldn’t do the same, it’s not that hard. When they were young it was like a had another extra job making sure they always had home cooked nutritious meals. They’ve never had junk food or sugary drinks!

Consult with their pediatrician, we were advised three servings of dairy per day, and make sure they eat about 1 gram of protein a day per pound of body weight. That’s a lot of meat, eggs, fish. Don’t even think about restricting food amounts if it’s clean, teenager boys eat a lot! In 6th grade my kid grew from 5’1” to 5’6”, it was crazy to watch.

My kid doesn’t drink juice or any bad drinks and just milk and water. Of course we all cook. Even pack every school lunch. That has nothing to do with height. It is genetics.

Since you put so much effort into food, why didn’t you put the same into academics and extracurricular activities?

If the milk your kid is drinking comes from a cow, a growing number of nutritionists and pediatricians consider it a "bad drink."

lol I cannot even track who is who in this convo but it is peak NW entitled mom. Sure, the main issue is boys drinking milk!

Land the helicopter ladies. Send your kid to school when the rules say to. let them have milk with their Cheerios.

Milk is not bad. Bizzare.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree that some of these posters show troubling mental health signs. Really surprised the lack of boundary awareness. We are talking about kids here and people are speculating wildly about special needs, IEP, what was approved, with absolutely no shred of evidence. Ultimately that’s a private matter, leave it to the school and parents.

The comments about taking pleasure in someone’s (a child, none the less!) misfortune were truly repugnant. You’ve got to have a massive chip on your shoulder to stoop so low.

The competition these parents imagine themselves to be in is truly disturbing. The kid starting kindergarten later won’t steal anyone spot at a coveted college or a job later on, life is not that deterministic.

Also the strident chest beating about how great of a mother a poster is for taking care of her special needs child, and judging everyone else by how they compare against how much she did for her kid. Are we competing on who sacrificed most for their kids now? That’s what it seems. The bragging and inquiring about whose kid is more advanced in math, that’s a whole next level of insane competitiveness.

Unfortunately these harpies are lost, there’s no relief in sight, because they think of themselves as heroine mothers and models to follow, the very voice of common sense.

Lol no. The issue is an entitled set of NW moms taking up ALL the air in the room to get their own way. That’s no way to run a school system and we have seen very recent examples of where catering to a coterie of “concerned moms” was disastrous.

Yes this. All of the opposition is because people who think rules don't apply to them are grating. But then the UNW moms create a bunch of straw man arguments and vehemently defend them. That feels like 50 percent of this thread now.

I know! The other 50% is “look how much I did for my child, why can’t you do the same?”

In short, striver mom gets her ivy (lol) hopes high when her kid is taking calculus in 10th grade, only to see them shattered by actual college admission results. Meanwhile, lower “stats” kid gets into UVA. Initially she can’t even comprehend it, but it finally dawn on her, the kid was redshirted, an unfair advantage that negated all her hard work throughout the years. All that kindergarten reading, the algebra in 6th, the tutoring, it was for nothing because her kid was the youngest in the grade, a massive handicap to those in the know.

So she does what any rational person would do, troll internet posting boards, seeking validation of her parenting skill and spewing venom on redshirted kids and their parents. It’s really cathartic at the end of the day, and much cheaper than therapy. Not as effective though, her rants are getting more and more unhinged.

This is a perfect example of a straw man argument . Thank you!

But you’ve been so forthcoming with sharing personal details in your life especially about giving parents advice on how to raise their kids.

For real though, what college did your kid go to? Because with all the advice you’re dishing out, forgive me, but I want to make sure you’re legit and the final outcome is worthy of paying attention to you. If it’s below William and Mary don’t say anything, we get it, I won’t push it further and you have my sympathy.

My kids are not in college yet but it’s clear you held back to game the system. You did it for your ego vs your kids. I could not care less the ranking and hope mine go to an affordable school so we can pay for college and grad school. Except in a few fields no one cares about rankings except someone like you.

You just proved the point we are making about people like you who are gaming the system. I feel for your kids given how competitive you are.

Why is it gaming the system to hold back a kid until he’s ready to enter kindergarten?

Don’t you want all the kids to do well?

Because they are bigger, stronger, taller, faster, start puberty early for their grade and have more developed brains than the age level kids in their grades. Those factors impact almost everything.

The physical traits only matter in sports and those are by age. The intellectual abilities are not as connected to age and more with learning.

I don’t believe it’s an advantage, but if you believe those things, why didn’t you redshirt you kid? I still don’t understand what the issue is if some parents want to advantage their kids and send them later. We don’t blink an eye at tutors and expensive private schools.

So, why did you hold back? No, intellectual abilities are partly due to IQ, partly hard work, baring any sn or learning disabilities. Older doesn't make you smarter or more intellectual. It makes you less intellectual as you are not with true peers and with younger peers with lower expectations. When expectations are lowered that's not smarter, that's gaming the system.

One of my kids is very short regardless. At 17 they are still very short. Should I have held them back 3-4 years to hope they'd grow more?

Some of us put a lot of effort into our children’s nutrition, I wonder why you couldn’t do the same, it’s not that hard. When they were young it was like a had another extra job making sure they always had home cooked nutritious meals. They’ve never had junk food or sugary drinks!

Consult with their pediatrician, we were advised three servings of dairy per day, and make sure they eat about 1 gram of protein a day per pound of body weight. That’s a lot of meat, eggs, fish. Don’t even think about restricting food amounts if it’s clean, teenager boys eat a lot! In 6th grade my kid grew from 5’1” to 5’6”, it was crazy to watch.

My kid doesn’t drink juice or any bad drinks and just milk and water. Of course we all cook. Even pack every school lunch. That has nothing to do with height. It is genetics.

Since you put so much effort into food, why didn’t you put the same into academics and extracurricular activities?

Maybe the issue is that the food does not taste good. Do they say they like it, see them eating it, or maybe throwing away secretly? Cook fresh instead of doing a large batch for the week. Only saying it because that’s what I did as a child and the portions were often too small. I was very skinny.

If the child is in the bottom 20 percentile of height, I’d look first at nutrition, especially if it’s a boy. Talk to an endocrinologist, do regular checkups, tell your concerns to the pediatrician. The “genetics” you’re talking about may be human growth hormone deficiency which is treatable.

Last, spend less time on forums biatching about redshirted kids and more on your child who seems to be in a state at terrible neglect.

Oh honey, the food is good and they eat no issue. They eat four meals a day. I don’t cook large batches. You cannot change genetics. I’m not giving my child artificial hormones that can cause other issues later in life. Your projecting. Maybe if you put half as much time into supporting your child’s education they could have gone on time.

STOP IT seriously

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree that some of these posters show troubling mental health signs. Really surprised the lack of boundary awareness. We are talking about kids here and people are speculating wildly about special needs, IEP, what was approved, with absolutely no shred of evidence. Ultimately that’s a private matter, leave it to the school and parents.

The comments about taking pleasure in someone’s (a child, none the less!) misfortune were truly repugnant. You’ve got to have a massive chip on your shoulder to stoop so low.

The competition these parents imagine themselves to be in is truly disturbing. The kid starting kindergarten later won’t steal anyone spot at a coveted college or a job later on, life is not that deterministic.

Also the strident chest beating about how great of a mother a poster is for taking care of her special needs child, and judging everyone else by how they compare against how much she did for her kid. Are we competing on who sacrificed most for their kids now? That’s what it seems. The bragging and inquiring about whose kid is more advanced in math, that’s a whole next level of insane competitiveness.

Unfortunately these harpies are lost, there’s no relief in sight, because they think of themselves as heroine mothers and models to follow, the very voice of common sense.

Lol no. The issue is an entitled set of NW moms taking up ALL the air in the room to get their own way. That’s no way to run a school system and we have seen very recent examples of where catering to a coterie of “concerned moms” was disastrous.

Yes this. All of the opposition is because people who think rules don't apply to them are grating. But then the UNW moms create a bunch of straw man arguments and vehemently defend them. That feels like 50 percent of this thread now.

I know! The other 50% is “look how much I did for my child, why can’t you do the same?”

In short, striver mom gets her ivy (lol) hopes high when her kid is taking calculus in 10th grade, only to see them shattered by actual college admission results. Meanwhile, lower “stats” kid gets into UVA. Initially she can’t even comprehend it, but it finally dawn on her, the kid was redshirted, an unfair advantage that negated all her hard work throughout the years. All that kindergarten reading, the algebra in 6th, the tutoring, it was for nothing because her kid was the youngest in the grade, a massive handicap to those in the know.

So she does what any rational person would do, troll internet posting boards, seeking validation of her parenting skill and spewing venom on redshirted kids and their parents. It’s really cathartic at the end of the day, and much cheaper than therapy. Not as effective though, her rants are getting more and more unhinged.

This is a perfect example of a straw man argument . Thank you!

But you’ve been so forthcoming with sharing personal details in your life especially about giving parents advice on how to raise their kids.

For real though, what college did your kid go to? Because with all the advice you’re dishing out, forgive me, but I want to make sure you’re legit and the final outcome is worthy of paying attention to you. If it’s below William and Mary don’t say anything, we get it, I won’t push it further and you have my sympathy.

My kids are not in college yet but it’s clear you held back to game the system. You did it for your ego vs your kids. I could not care less the ranking and hope mine go to an affordable school so we can pay for college and grad school. Except in a few fields no one cares about rankings except someone like you.

You just proved the point we are making about people like you who are gaming the system. I feel for your kids given how competitive you are.

Why is it gaming the system to hold back a kid until he’s ready to enter kindergarten?

Don’t you want all the kids to do well?

Because they are bigger, stronger, taller, faster, start puberty early for their grade and have more developed brains than the age level kids in their grades. Those factors impact almost everything.

The physical traits only matter in sports and those are by age. The intellectual abilities are not as connected to age and more with learning.

I don’t believe it’s an advantage, but if you believe those things, why didn’t you redshirt you kid? I still don’t understand what the issue is if some parents want to advantage their kids and send them later. We don’t blink an eye at tutors and expensive private schools.

So, why did you hold back? No, intellectual abilities are partly due to IQ, partly hard work, baring any sn or learning disabilities. Older doesn't make you smarter or more intellectual. It makes you less intellectual as you are not with true peers and with younger peers with lower expectations. When expectations are lowered that's not smarter, that's gaming the system.

One of my kids is very short regardless. At 17 they are still very short. Should I have held them back 3-4 years to hope they'd grow more?

Some of us put a lot of effort into our children’s nutrition, I wonder why you couldn’t do the same, it’s not that hard. When they were young it was like a had another extra job making sure they always had home cooked nutritious meals. They’ve never had junk food or sugary drinks!

Consult with their pediatrician, we were advised three servings of dairy per day, and make sure they eat about 1 gram of protein a day per pound of body weight. That’s a lot of meat, eggs, fish. Don’t even think about restricting food amounts if it’s clean, teenager boys eat a lot! In 6th grade my kid grew from 5’1” to 5’6”, it was crazy to watch.

My kid doesn’t drink juice or any bad drinks and just milk and water. Of course we all cook. Even pack every school lunch. That has nothing to do with height. It is genetics.

Since you put so much effort into food, why didn’t you put the same into academics and extracurricular activities?

Maybe the issue is that the food does not taste good. Do they say they like it, see them eating it, or maybe throwing away secretly? Cook fresh instead of doing a large batch for the week. Only saying it because that’s what I did as a child and the portions were often too small. I was very skinny.

If the child is in the bottom 20 percentile of height, I’d look first at nutrition, especially if it’s a boy. Talk to an endocrinologist, do regular checkups, tell your concerns to the pediatrician. The “genetics” you’re talking about may be human growth hormone deficiency which is treatable.

Last, spend less time on forums biatching about redshirted kids and more on your child who seems to be in a state at terrible neglect.

Wow, read the room lady. You're doing nothing but turning fence sitters strongly against you.

So you can tell people how to raise their kids, opining about how to educate them when to send them to school, criticizing their choices etc, but when the favor is returned regarding the way you raise yours, that’s off the limits.

Hopefully you learned something, but I doubt. This energy is better spent on your child, instead of your imaginary fight with other parents, which frankly is only happening in your head. You have no agency over the entire matter.

I’m serious about the hormonal part though. You should check with their doctor.

NP but "when to send them to school" is a question of law, not opinion. Criticising people for breaking the law is not the same as assuming short kids are malnourished based on spite.

NP but kids that are “very short for their age” are often malnourished as in not getting enough calories or nutrient profile to support their growth. Or there’s an underlying medical condition that is ignored.

Maybe thank the poster for raising that concern? I don’t think it was out of spite.

It depends on the height. At 17 for boys 5’7” is the lower quartile, 5’5” is the lowest decile (lowest 10 percent).

While there is variability and outliers, I’d definitely look into nutrition and hormonal imbalances at that point, especially if the kid started at a higher height percentile in early childhood.

Strange you say nutrition when the doctors all say genetics. The kid isn’t malnourished.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree that some of these posters show troubling mental health signs. Really surprised the lack of boundary awareness. We are talking about kids here and people are speculating wildly about special needs, IEP, what was approved, with absolutely no shred of evidence. Ultimately that’s a private matter, leave it to the school and parents.

The comments about taking pleasure in someone’s (a child, none the less!) misfortune were truly repugnant. You’ve got to have a massive chip on your shoulder to stoop so low.

The competition these parents imagine themselves to be in is truly disturbing. The kid starting kindergarten later won’t steal anyone spot at a coveted college or a job later on, life is not that deterministic.

Also the strident chest beating about how great of a mother a poster is for taking care of her special needs child, and judging everyone else by how they compare against how much she did for her kid. Are we competing on who sacrificed most for their kids now? That’s what it seems. The bragging and inquiring about whose kid is more advanced in math, that’s a whole next level of insane competitiveness.

Unfortunately these harpies are lost, there’s no relief in sight, because they think of themselves as heroine mothers and models to follow, the very voice of common sense.

Lol no. The issue is an entitled set of NW moms taking up ALL the air in the room to get their own way. That’s no way to run a school system and we have seen very recent examples of where catering to a coterie of “concerned moms” was disastrous.

Yes this. All of the opposition is because people who think rules don't apply to them are grating. But then the UNW moms create a bunch of straw man arguments and vehemently defend them. That feels like 50 percent of this thread now.

I know! The other 50% is “look how much I did for my child, why can’t you do the same?”

In short, striver mom gets her ivy (lol) hopes high when her kid is taking calculus in 10th grade, only to see them shattered by actual college admission results. Meanwhile, lower “stats” kid gets into UVA. Initially she can’t even comprehend it, but it finally dawn on her, the kid was redshirted, an unfair advantage that negated all her hard work throughout the years. All that kindergarten reading, the algebra in 6th, the tutoring, it was for nothing because her kid was the youngest in the grade, a massive handicap to those in the know.

So she does what any rational person would do, troll internet posting boards, seeking validation of her parenting skill and spewing venom on redshirted kids and their parents. It’s really cathartic at the end of the day, and much cheaper than therapy. Not as effective though, her rants are getting more and more unhinged.

This is a perfect example of a straw man argument . Thank you!

But you’ve been so forthcoming with sharing personal details in your life especially about giving parents advice on how to raise their kids.

For real though, what college did your kid go to? Because with all the advice you’re dishing out, forgive me, but I want to make sure you’re legit and the final outcome is worthy of paying attention to you. If it’s below William and Mary don’t say anything, we get it, I won’t push it further and you have my sympathy.

My kids are not in college yet but it’s clear you held back to game the system. You did it for your ego vs your kids. I could not care less the ranking and hope mine go to an affordable school so we can pay for college and grad school. Except in a few fields no one cares about rankings except someone like you.

You just proved the point we are making about people like you who are gaming the system. I feel for your kids given how competitive you are.

Why is it gaming the system to hold back a kid until he’s ready to enter kindergarten?

Don’t you want all the kids to do well?

Because they are bigger, stronger, taller, faster, start puberty early for their grade and have more developed brains than the age level kids in their grades. Those factors impact almost everything.

The physical traits only matter in sports and those are by age. The intellectual abilities are not as connected to age and more with learning.

I don’t believe it’s an advantage, but if you believe those things, why didn’t you redshirt you kid? I still don’t understand what the issue is if some parents want to advantage their kids and send them later. We don’t blink an eye at tutors and expensive private schools.

So, why did you hold back? No, intellectual abilities are partly due to IQ, partly hard work, baring any sn or learning disabilities. Older doesn't make you smarter or more intellectual. It makes you less intellectual as you are not with true peers and with younger peers with lower expectations. When expectations are lowered that's not smarter, that's gaming the system.

One of my kids is very short regardless. At 17 they are still very short. Should I have held them back 3-4 years to hope they'd grow more?

Some of us put a lot of effort into our children’s nutrition, I wonder why you couldn’t do the same, it’s not that hard. When they were young it was like a had another extra job making sure they always had home cooked nutritious meals. They’ve never had junk food or sugary drinks!

Consult with their pediatrician, we were advised three servings of dairy per day, and make sure they eat about 1 gram of protein a day per pound of body weight. That’s a lot of meat, eggs, fish. Don’t even think about restricting food amounts if it’s clean, teenager boys eat a lot! In 6th grade my kid grew from 5’1” to 5’6”, it was crazy to watch.

My kid doesn’t drink juice or any bad drinks and just milk and water. Of course we all cook. Even pack every school lunch. That has nothing to do with height. It is genetics.

Since you put so much effort into food, why didn’t you put the same into academics and extracurricular activities?

Maybe the issue is that the food does not taste good. Do they say they like it, see them eating it, or maybe throwing away secretly? Cook fresh instead of doing a large batch for the week. Only saying it because that’s what I did as a child and the portions were often too small. I was very skinny.

If the child is in the bottom 20 percentile of height, I’d look first at nutrition, especially if it’s a boy. Talk to an endocrinologist, do regular checkups, tell your concerns to the pediatrician. The “genetics” you’re talking about may be human growth hormone deficiency which is treatable.

Last, spend less time on forums biatching about redshirted kids and more on your child who seems to be in a state at terrible neglect.

Wow, read the room lady. You're doing nothing but turning fence sitters strongly against you.

So you can tell people how to raise their kids, opining about how to educate them when to send them to school, criticizing their choices etc, but when the favor is returned regarding the way you raise yours, that’s off the limits.

Hopefully you learned something, but I doubt. This energy is better spent on your child, instead of your imaginary fight with other parents, which frankly is only happening in your head. You have no agency over the entire matter.

I’m serious about the hormonal part though. You should check with their doctor.

NP but "when to send them to school" is a question of law, not opinion. Criticising people for breaking the law is not the same as assuming short kids are malnourished based on spite.

That’s not what I understood from Eric Goulet letter. There seems to be flexibility on when kids start kindergarten and there was abuse by district officials. The proposed solution was that kids start kindergarten in the fall.

Wow, way to miss the point entirely. And, yes, I'm pretty sure that no matter what happens, kids will be starting Kindergarten in the fall (or late summer, really).

I meant the kids in question that the district wants to put in 1st grade. It was in the letter on the last page.

That’s appropriate. Parents have all summer to get them caught up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree that some of these posters show troubling mental health signs. Really surprised the lack of boundary awareness. We are talking about kids here and people are speculating wildly about special needs, IEP, what was approved, with absolutely no shred of evidence. Ultimately that’s a private matter, leave it to the school and parents.

The comments about taking pleasure in someone’s (a child, none the less!) misfortune were truly repugnant. You’ve got to have a massive chip on your shoulder to stoop so low.

The competition these parents imagine themselves to be in is truly disturbing. The kid starting kindergarten later won’t steal anyone spot at a coveted college or a job later on, life is not that deterministic.

Also the strident chest beating about how great of a mother a poster is for taking care of her special needs child, and judging everyone else by how they compare against how much she did for her kid. Are we competing on who sacrificed most for their kids now? That’s what it seems. The bragging and inquiring about whose kid is more advanced in math, that’s a whole next level of insane competitiveness.

Unfortunately these harpies are lost, there’s no relief in sight, because they think of themselves as heroine mothers and models to follow, the very voice of common sense.

Lol no. The issue is an entitled set of NW moms taking up ALL the air in the room to get their own way. That’s no way to run a school system and we have seen very recent examples of where catering to a coterie of “concerned moms” was disastrous.

Yes this. All of the opposition is because people who think rules don't apply to them are grating. But then the UNW moms create a bunch of straw man arguments and vehemently defend them. That feels like 50 percent of this thread now.

I know! The other 50% is “look how much I did for my child, why can’t you do the same?”

In short, striver mom gets her ivy (lol) hopes high when her kid is taking calculus in 10th grade, only to see them shattered by actual college admission results. Meanwhile, lower “stats” kid gets into UVA. Initially she can’t even comprehend it, but it finally dawn on her, the kid was redshirted, an unfair advantage that negated all her hard work throughout the years. All that kindergarten reading, the algebra in 6th, the tutoring, it was for nothing because her kid was the youngest in the grade, a massive handicap to those in the know.

So she does what any rational person would do, troll internet posting boards, seeking validation of her parenting skill and spewing venom on redshirted kids and their parents. It’s really cathartic at the end of the day, and much cheaper than therapy. Not as effective though, her rants are getting more and more unhinged.

This is a perfect example of a straw man argument . Thank you!

But you’ve been so forthcoming with sharing personal details in your life especially about giving parents advice on how to raise their kids.

For real though, what college did your kid go to? Because with all the advice you’re dishing out, forgive me, but I want to make sure you’re legit and the final outcome is worthy of paying attention to you. If it’s below William and Mary don’t say anything, we get it, I won’t push it further and you have my sympathy.

My kids are not in college yet but it’s clear you held back to game the system. You did it for your ego vs your kids. I could not care less the ranking and hope mine go to an affordable school so we can pay for college and grad school. Except in a few fields no one cares about rankings except someone like you.

You just proved the point we are making about people like you who are gaming the system. I feel for your kids given how competitive you are.

Why is it gaming the system to hold back a kid until he’s ready to enter kindergarten?

Don’t you want all the kids to do well?

Because they are bigger, stronger, taller, faster, start puberty early for their grade and have more developed brains than the age level kids in their grades. Those factors impact almost everything.

The physical traits only matter in sports and those are by age. The intellectual abilities are not as connected to age and more with learning.

I don’t believe it’s an advantage, but if you believe those things, why didn’t you redshirt you kid? I still don’t understand what the issue is if some parents want to advantage their kids and send them later. We don’t blink an eye at tutors and expensive private schools.

Some sports have ethical policies that go by age not grade, to prevent this nonsense. I have smart kids, good IQ's and we prepared them academically and support as needed. Maybe if you tried that....

He does great academically even without me putting a lot of effort into it. With my career I wouldn’t have the time anyways. He has always been more independent and mature compared to other kids. Based on grades, AP scores and extracurriculars (captain of the varsity swim team) we’re targeting top schools.

Where does your kid go? If it’s around Boston they might end up close, fingers crossed!

This is a pretty typical profile. The more you post, the more you look silly as no reason to hold back. How do they do swimming outside hs where it is age based? How do they just have hs swim as an extra curricular. That’s only like three months out of the year. Funny how competitive you are. It’s sad you admit you put no effort in and your career comes first. He isn’t more mature or independent. He’s one to two years older so he’s equal or less due to the age gap. I feel bad for kids like yours where parents have all kinds of d of priorities that aren’t their kids being first. You held back for you, not him.

Don’t tell me how to raise my child I won’t tell you how to raise yours. Same with family priorities.

Really don’t get what your beef is or why you feel bad. How was that a “bad” outcome for the child? The kid turned out fine, maybe it would have been fine either way. If anything it is an indication that redshirting is not detrimental. In the end it’s a smart kid, doing great academically and socially that has a bright future ahead. That’s the dream of every parent. Mission accomplished, moving on to the next chapter in life.

You aren’t raising your kid. You are too busy with your career. These kids are not smarter and brighter nor more mature. They are with younger peers so you need to put them with age appropriate peers to compare. They may not survive in college never having to work hard or be challenged.

A total of 14 AP scores of 5 throughout high school would beg to differ. In high school the age matters less, there a lot of mixing between younger and older students especially in AP classes. It doesn’t matter. We didn’t care about classmates birthdays but my estimate is he was younger than the average in AP Calculus, older in AP Spanish.

I’m happy about how I raised my kid and where he ended up, actually I’m quite proud of it. Having a career is in my view a positive model for a child that can see the parent being engaged and a productive member of society. My kid absolutely loved career days.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree that some of these posters show troubling mental health signs. Really surprised the lack of boundary awareness. We are talking about kids here and people are speculating wildly about special needs, IEP, what was approved, with absolutely no shred of evidence. Ultimately that’s a private matter, leave it to the school and parents.

The comments about taking pleasure in someone’s (a child, none the less!) misfortune were truly repugnant. You’ve got to have a massive chip on your shoulder to stoop so low.

The competition these parents imagine themselves to be in is truly disturbing. The kid starting kindergarten later won’t steal anyone spot at a coveted college or a job later on, life is not that deterministic.

Also the strident chest beating about how great of a mother a poster is for taking care of her special needs child, and judging everyone else by how they compare against how much she did for her kid. Are we competing on who sacrificed most for their kids now? That’s what it seems. The bragging and inquiring about whose kid is more advanced in math, that’s a whole next level of insane competitiveness.

Unfortunately these harpies are lost, there’s no relief in sight, because they think of themselves as heroine mothers and models to follow, the very voice of common sense.

Lol no. The issue is an entitled set of NW moms taking up ALL the air in the room to get their own way. That’s no way to run a school system and we have seen very recent examples of where catering to a coterie of “concerned moms” was disastrous.

Yes this. All of the opposition is because people who think rules don't apply to them are grating. But then the UNW moms create a bunch of straw man arguments and vehemently defend them. That feels like 50 percent of this thread now.

I know! The other 50% is “look how much I did for my child, why can’t you do the same?”

In short, striver mom gets her ivy (lol) hopes high when her kid is taking calculus in 10th grade, only to see them shattered by actual college admission results. Meanwhile, lower “stats” kid gets into UVA. Initially she can’t even comprehend it, but it finally dawn on her, the kid was redshirted, an unfair advantage that negated all her hard work throughout the years. All that kindergarten reading, the algebra in 6th, the tutoring, it was for nothing because her kid was the youngest in the grade, a massive handicap to those in the know.

So she does what any rational person would do, troll internet posting boards, seeking validation of her parenting skill and spewing venom on redshirted kids and their parents. It’s really cathartic at the end of the day, and much cheaper than therapy. Not as effective though, her rants are getting more and more unhinged.

This is a perfect example of a straw man argument . Thank you!

But you’ve been so forthcoming with sharing personal details in your life especially about giving parents advice on how to raise their kids.

For real though, what college did your kid go to? Because with all the advice you’re dishing out, forgive me, but I want to make sure you’re legit and the final outcome is worthy of paying attention to you. If it’s below William and Mary don’t say anything, we get it, I won’t push it further and you have my sympathy.

My kids are not in college yet but it’s clear you held back to game the system. You did it for your ego vs your kids. I could not care less the ranking and hope mine go to an affordable school so we can pay for college and grad school. Except in a few fields no one cares about rankings except someone like you.

You just proved the point we are making about people like you who are gaming the system. I feel for your kids given how competitive you are.

Why is it gaming the system to hold back a kid until he’s ready to enter kindergarten?

Don’t you want all the kids to do well?

Because they are bigger, stronger, taller, faster, start puberty early for their grade and have more developed brains than the age level kids in their grades. Those factors impact almost everything.

The physical traits only matter in sports and those are by age. The intellectual abilities are not as connected to age and more with learning.

I don’t believe it’s an advantage, but if you believe those things, why didn’t you redshirt you kid? I still don’t understand what the issue is if some parents want to advantage their kids and send them later. We don’t blink an eye at tutors and expensive private schools.

So, why did you hold back? No, intellectual abilities are partly due to IQ, partly hard work, baring any sn or learning disabilities. Older doesn't make you smarter or more intellectual. It makes you less intellectual as you are not with true peers and with younger peers with lower expectations. When expectations are lowered that's not smarter, that's gaming the system.

One of my kids is very short regardless. At 17 they are still very short. Should I have held them back 3-4 years to hope they'd grow more?

Some of us put a lot of effort into our children’s nutrition, I wonder why you couldn’t do the same, it’s not that hard. When they were young it was like a had another extra job making sure they always had home cooked nutritious meals. They’ve never had junk food or sugary drinks!

Consult with their pediatrician, we were advised three servings of dairy per day, and make sure they eat about 1 gram of protein a day per pound of body weight. That’s a lot of meat, eggs, fish. Don’t even think about restricting food amounts if it’s clean, teenager boys eat a lot! In 6th grade my kid grew from 5’1” to 5’6”, it was crazy to watch.

My kid doesn’t drink juice or any bad drinks and just milk and water. Of course we all cook. Even pack every school lunch. That has nothing to do with height. It is genetics.

Since you put so much effort into food, why didn’t you put the same into academics and extracurricular activities?

Maybe the issue is that the food does not taste good. Do they say they like it, see them eating it, or maybe throwing away secretly? Cook fresh instead of doing a large batch for the week. Only saying it because that’s what I did as a child and the portions were often too small. I was very skinny.

If the child is in the bottom 20 percentile of height, I’d look first at nutrition, especially if it’s a boy. Talk to an endocrinologist, do regular checkups, tell your concerns to the pediatrician. The “genetics” you’re talking about may be human growth hormone deficiency which is treatable.

Last, spend less time on forums biatching about redshirted kids and more on your child who seems to be in a state at terrible neglect.

Oh honey, the food is good and they eat no issue. They eat four meals a day. I don’t cook large batches. You cannot change genetics. I’m not giving my child artificial hormones that can cause other issues later in life. Your projecting. Maybe if you put half as much time into supporting your child’s education they could have gone on time.

Please get informed about this for the sake of your child. Genetics can also mean epigenetics as in the genes are turned on to make needed hormones. The ignorance is breathtaking.

If you’re against artificial hormones, are you also against diabetes treatment, because insulin is an artificial hormone. Against birth control too? Anti vaccine? I’m not surprised though, of course the most rabid anti-redshirters are also anti science and conspiracy theorists.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree that some of these posters show troubling mental health signs. Really surprised the lack of boundary awareness. We are talking about kids here and people are speculating wildly about special needs, IEP, what was approved, with absolutely no shred of evidence. Ultimately that’s a private matter, leave it to the school and parents.

The comments about taking pleasure in someone’s (a child, none the less!) misfortune were truly repugnant. You’ve got to have a massive chip on your shoulder to stoop so low.

The competition these parents imagine themselves to be in is truly disturbing. The kid starting kindergarten later won’t steal anyone spot at a coveted college or a job later on, life is not that deterministic.

Also the strident chest beating about how great of a mother a poster is for taking care of her special needs child, and judging everyone else by how they compare against how much she did for her kid. Are we competing on who sacrificed most for their kids now? That’s what it seems. The bragging and inquiring about whose kid is more advanced in math, that’s a whole next level of insane competitiveness.

Unfortunately these harpies are lost, there’s no relief in sight, because they think of themselves as heroine mothers and models to follow, the very voice of common sense.

Lol no. The issue is an entitled set of NW moms taking up ALL the air in the room to get their own way. That’s no way to run a school system and we have seen very recent examples of where catering to a coterie of “concerned moms” was disastrous.

Yes this. All of the opposition is because people who think rules don't apply to them are grating. But then the UNW moms create a bunch of straw man arguments and vehemently defend them. That feels like 50 percent of this thread now.

I know! The other 50% is “look how much I did for my child, why can’t you do the same?”

In short, striver mom gets her ivy (lol) hopes high when her kid is taking calculus in 10th grade, only to see them shattered by actual college admission results. Meanwhile, lower “stats” kid gets into UVA. Initially she can’t even comprehend it, but it finally dawn on her, the kid was redshirted, an unfair advantage that negated all her hard work throughout the years. All that kindergarten reading, the algebra in 6th, the tutoring, it was for nothing because her kid was the youngest in the grade, a massive handicap to those in the know.

So she does what any rational person would do, troll internet posting boards, seeking validation of her parenting skill and spewing venom on redshirted kids and their parents. It’s really cathartic at the end of the day, and much cheaper than therapy. Not as effective though, her rants are getting more and more unhinged.

This is a perfect example of a straw man argument . Thank you!

But you’ve been so forthcoming with sharing personal details in your life especially about giving parents advice on how to raise their kids.

For real though, what college did your kid go to? Because with all the advice you’re dishing out, forgive me, but I want to make sure you’re legit and the final outcome is worthy of paying attention to you. If it’s below William and Mary don’t say anything, we get it, I won’t push it further and you have my sympathy.

My kids are not in college yet but it’s clear you held back to game the system. You did it for your ego vs your kids. I could not care less the ranking and hope mine go to an affordable school so we can pay for college and grad school. Except in a few fields no one cares about rankings except someone like you.

You just proved the point we are making about people like you who are gaming the system. I feel for your kids given how competitive you are.

Why is it gaming the system to hold back a kid until he’s ready to enter kindergarten?

Don’t you want all the kids to do well?

Because they are bigger, stronger, taller, faster, start puberty early for their grade and have more developed brains than the age level kids in their grades. Those factors impact almost everything.

The physical traits only matter in sports and those are by age. The intellectual abilities are not as connected to age and more with learning.

I don’t believe it’s an advantage, but if you believe those things, why didn’t you redshirt you kid? I still don’t understand what the issue is if some parents want to advantage their kids and send them later. We don’t blink an eye at tutors and expensive private schools.

Some sports have ethical policies that go by age not grade, to prevent this nonsense. I have smart kids, good IQ's and we prepared them academically and support as needed. Maybe if you tried that....

He does great academically even without me putting a lot of effort into it. With my career I wouldn’t have the time anyways. He has always been more independent and mature compared to other kids. Based on grades, AP scores and extracurriculars (captain of the varsity swim team) we’re targeting top schools.

Where does your kid go? If it’s around Boston they might end up close, fingers crossed!

This is a pretty typical profile. The more you post, the more you look silly as no reason to hold back. How do they do swimming outside hs where it is age based? How do they just have hs swim as an extra curricular. That’s only like three months out of the year. Funny how competitive you are. It’s sad you admit you put no effort in and your career comes first. He isn’t more mature or independent. He’s one to two years older so he’s equal or less due to the age gap. I feel bad for kids like yours where parents have all kinds of d of priorities that aren’t their kids being first. You held back for you, not him.

Don’t tell me how to raise my child I won’t tell you how to raise yours. Same with family priorities.

Really don’t get what your beef is or why you feel bad. How was that a “bad” outcome for the child? The kid turned out fine, maybe it would have been fine either way. If anything it is an indication that redshirting is not detrimental. In the end it’s a smart kid, doing great academically and socially that has a bright future ahead. That’s the dream of every parent. Mission accomplished, moving on to the next chapter in life.

You aren’t raising your kid. You are too busy with your career. These kids are not smarter and brighter nor more mature. They are with younger peers so you need to put them with age appropriate peers to compare. They may not survive in college never having to work hard or be challenged.

A total of 14 AP scores of 5 throughout high school would beg to differ. In high school the age matters less, there a lot of mixing between younger and older students especially in AP classes. It doesn’t matter. We didn’t care about classmates birthdays but my estimate is he was younger than the average in AP Calculus, older in AP Spanish.

I’m happy about how I raised my kid and where he ended up, actually I’m quite proud of it. Having a career is in my view a positive model for a child that can see the parent being engaged and a productive member of society. My kid absolutely loved career days.

Again, that is pretty normal and per your posts there was no reason to hold him back. It was all about your needs and ego. Younger than average in calc. Most juniors and seniors take calc bc at our school, so they were much older than their peers. It matters when your 19 year old is with 14 year olds and it’s not a fair playing field.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree that some of these posters show troubling mental health signs. Really surprised the lack of boundary awareness. We are talking about kids here and people are speculating wildly about special needs, IEP, what was approved, with absolutely no shred of evidence. Ultimately that’s a private matter, leave it to the school and parents.

The comments about taking pleasure in someone’s (a child, none the less!) misfortune were truly repugnant. You’ve got to have a massive chip on your shoulder to stoop so low.

The competition these parents imagine themselves to be in is truly disturbing. The kid starting kindergarten later won’t steal anyone spot at a coveted college or a job later on, life is not that deterministic.

Also the strident chest beating about how great of a mother a poster is for taking care of her special needs child, and judging everyone else by how they compare against how much she did for her kid. Are we competing on who sacrificed most for their kids now? That’s what it seems. The bragging and inquiring about whose kid is more advanced in math, that’s a whole next level of insane competitiveness.

Unfortunately these harpies are lost, there’s no relief in sight, because they think of themselves as heroine mothers and models to follow, the very voice of common sense.

Lol no. The issue is an entitled set of NW moms taking up ALL the air in the room to get their own way. That’s no way to run a school system and we have seen very recent examples of where catering to a coterie of “concerned moms” was disastrous.

Yes this. All of the opposition is because people who think rules don't apply to them are grating. But then the UNW moms create a bunch of straw man arguments and vehemently defend them. That feels like 50 percent of this thread now.

I know! The other 50% is “look how much I did for my child, why can’t you do the same?”

In short, striver mom gets her ivy (lol) hopes high when her kid is taking calculus in 10th grade, only to see them shattered by actual college admission results. Meanwhile, lower “stats” kid gets into UVA. Initially she can’t even comprehend it, but it finally dawn on her, the kid was redshirted, an unfair advantage that negated all her hard work throughout the years. All that kindergarten reading, the algebra in 6th, the tutoring, it was for nothing because her kid was the youngest in the grade, a massive handicap to those in the know.

So she does what any rational person would do, troll internet posting boards, seeking validation of her parenting skill and spewing venom on redshirted kids and their parents. It’s really cathartic at the end of the day, and much cheaper than therapy. Not as effective though, her rants are getting more and more unhinged.

This is a perfect example of a straw man argument . Thank you!

But you’ve been so forthcoming with sharing personal details in your life especially about giving parents advice on how to raise their kids.

For real though, what college did your kid go to? Because with all the advice you’re dishing out, forgive me, but I want to make sure you’re legit and the final outcome is worthy of paying attention to you. If it’s below William and Mary don’t say anything, we get it, I won’t push it further and you have my sympathy.

My kids are not in college yet but it’s clear you held back to game the system. You did it for your ego vs your kids. I could not care less the ranking and hope mine go to an affordable school so we can pay for college and grad school. Except in a few fields no one cares about rankings except someone like you.

You just proved the point we are making about people like you who are gaming the system. I feel for your kids given how competitive you are.

Why is it gaming the system to hold back a kid until he’s ready to enter kindergarten?

Don’t you want all the kids to do well?

Because they are bigger, stronger, taller, faster, start puberty early for their grade and have more developed brains than the age level kids in their grades. Those factors impact almost everything.

The physical traits only matter in sports and those are by age. The intellectual abilities are not as connected to age and more with learning.

I don’t believe it’s an advantage, but if you believe those things, why didn’t you redshirt you kid? I still don’t understand what the issue is if some parents want to advantage their kids and send them later. We don’t blink an eye at tutors and expensive private schools.

So, why did you hold back? No, intellectual abilities are partly due to IQ, partly hard work, baring any sn or learning disabilities. Older doesn't make you smarter or more intellectual. It makes you less intellectual as you are not with true peers and with younger peers with lower expectations. When expectations are lowered that's not smarter, that's gaming the system.

One of my kids is very short regardless. At 17 they are still very short. Should I have held them back 3-4 years to hope they'd grow more?

Some of us put a lot of effort into our children’s nutrition, I wonder why you couldn’t do the same, it’s not that hard. When they were young it was like a had another extra job making sure they always had home cooked nutritious meals. They’ve never had junk food or sugary drinks!

Consult with their pediatrician, we were advised three servings of dairy per day, and make sure they eat about 1 gram of protein a day per pound of body weight. That’s a lot of meat, eggs, fish. Don’t even think about restricting food amounts if it’s clean, teenager boys eat a lot! In 6th grade my kid grew from 5’1” to 5’6”, it was crazy to watch.

My kid doesn’t drink juice or any bad drinks and just milk and water. Of course we all cook. Even pack every school lunch. That has nothing to do with height. It is genetics.

Since you put so much effort into food, why didn’t you put the same into academics and extracurricular activities?

Maybe the issue is that the food does not taste good. Do they say they like it, see them eating it, or maybe throwing away secretly? Cook fresh instead of doing a large batch for the week. Only saying it because that’s what I did as a child and the portions were often too small. I was very skinny.

If the child is in the bottom 20 percentile of height, I’d look first at nutrition, especially if it’s a boy. Talk to an endocrinologist, do regular checkups, tell your concerns to the pediatrician. The “genetics” you’re talking about may be human growth hormone deficiency which is treatable.

Last, spend less time on forums biatching about redshirted kids and more on your child who seems to be in a state at terrible neglect.

Oh honey, the food is good and they eat no issue. They eat four meals a day. I don’t cook large batches. You cannot change genetics. I’m not giving my child artificial hormones that can cause other issues later in life. Your projecting. Maybe if you put half as much time into supporting your child’s education they could have gone on time.

Please get informed about this for the sake of your child. Genetics can also mean epigenetics as in the genes are turned on to make needed hormones. The ignorance is breathtaking.

If you’re against artificial hormones, are you also against diabetes treatment, because insulin is an artificial hormone. Against birth control too? Anti vaccine? I’m not surprised though, of course the most rabid anti-redshirters are also anti science and conspiracy theorists.

Those things are nit comparable. I’m ok with my kid being short. They don’t want the hormones, so it’s a no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree that some of these posters show troubling mental health signs. Really surprised the lack of boundary awareness. We are talking about kids here and people are speculating wildly about special needs, IEP, what was approved, with absolutely no shred of evidence. Ultimately that’s a private matter, leave it to the school and parents.

The comments about taking pleasure in someone’s (a child, none the less!) misfortune were truly repugnant. You’ve got to have a massive chip on your shoulder to stoop so low.

The competition these parents imagine themselves to be in is truly disturbing. The kid starting kindergarten later won’t steal anyone spot at a coveted college or a job later on, life is not that deterministic.

Also the strident chest beating about how great of a mother a poster is for taking care of her special needs child, and judging everyone else by how they compare against how much she did for her kid. Are we competing on who sacrificed most for their kids now? That’s what it seems. The bragging and inquiring about whose kid is more advanced in math, that’s a whole next level of insane competitiveness.

Unfortunately these harpies are lost, there’s no relief in sight, because they think of themselves as heroine mothers and models to follow, the very voice of common sense.

Lol no. The issue is an entitled set of NW moms taking up ALL the air in the room to get their own way. That’s no way to run a school system and we have seen very recent examples of where catering to a coterie of “concerned moms” was disastrous.

Yes this. All of the opposition is because people who think rules don't apply to them are grating. But then the UNW moms create a bunch of straw man arguments and vehemently defend them. That feels like 50 percent of this thread now.

I know! The other 50% is “look how much I did for my child, why can’t you do the same?”

In short, striver mom gets her ivy (lol) hopes high when her kid is taking calculus in 10th grade, only to see them shattered by actual college admission results. Meanwhile, lower “stats” kid gets into UVA. Initially she can’t even comprehend it, but it finally dawn on her, the kid was redshirted, an unfair advantage that negated all her hard work throughout the years. All that kindergarten reading, the algebra in 6th, the tutoring, it was for nothing because her kid was the youngest in the grade, a massive handicap to those in the know.

So she does what any rational person would do, troll internet posting boards, seeking validation of her parenting skill and spewing venom on redshirted kids and their parents. It’s really cathartic at the end of the day, and much cheaper than therapy. Not as effective though, her rants are getting more and more unhinged.

This is a perfect example of a straw man argument . Thank you!

But you’ve been so forthcoming with sharing personal details in your life especially about giving parents advice on how to raise their kids.

For real though, what college did your kid go to? Because with all the advice you’re dishing out, forgive me, but I want to make sure you’re legit and the final outcome is worthy of paying attention to you. If it’s below William and Mary don’t say anything, we get it, I won’t push it further and you have my sympathy.

My kids are not in college yet but it’s clear you held back to game the system. You did it for your ego vs your kids. I could not care less the ranking and hope mine go to an affordable school so we can pay for college and grad school. Except in a few fields no one cares about rankings except someone like you.

You just proved the point we are making about people like you who are gaming the system. I feel for your kids given how competitive you are.

Why is it gaming the system to hold back a kid until he’s ready to enter kindergarten?

Don’t you want all the kids to do well?

Because they are bigger, stronger, taller, faster, start puberty early for their grade and have more developed brains than the age level kids in their grades. Those factors impact almost everything.

The physical traits only matter in sports and those are by age. The intellectual abilities are not as connected to age and more with learning.

I don’t believe it’s an advantage, but if you believe those things, why didn’t you redshirt you kid? I still don’t understand what the issue is if some parents want to advantage their kids and send them later. We don’t blink an eye at tutors and expensive private schools.

Some sports have ethical policies that go by age not grade, to prevent this nonsense. I have smart kids, good IQ's and we prepared them academically and support as needed. Maybe if you tried that....

He does great academically even without me putting a lot of effort into it. With my career I wouldn’t have the time anyways. He has always been more independent and mature compared to other kids. Based on grades, AP scores and extracurriculars (captain of the varsity swim team) we’re targeting top schools.

Where does your kid go? If it’s around Boston they might end up close, fingers crossed!

This is a pretty typical profile. The more you post, the more you look silly as no reason to hold back. How do they do swimming outside hs where it is age based? How do they just have hs swim as an extra curricular. That’s only like three months out of the year. Funny how competitive you are. It’s sad you admit you put no effort in and your career comes first. He isn’t more mature or independent. He’s one to two years older so he’s equal or less due to the age gap. I feel bad for kids like yours where parents have all kinds of d of priorities that aren’t their kids being first. You held back for you, not him.

Don’t tell me how to raise my child I won’t tell you how to raise yours. Same with family priorities.

Really don’t get what your beef is or why you feel bad. How was that a “bad” outcome for the child? The kid turned out fine, maybe it would have been fine either way. If anything it is an indication that redshirting is not detrimental. In the end it’s a smart kid, doing great academically and socially that has a bright future ahead. That’s the dream of every parent. Mission accomplished, moving on to the next chapter in life.

You aren’t raising your kid. You are too busy with your career. These kids are not smarter and brighter nor more mature. They are with younger peers so you need to put them with age appropriate peers to compare. They may not survive in college never having to work hard or be challenged.

A total of 14 AP scores of 5 throughout high school would beg to differ. In high school the age matters less, there a lot of mixing between younger and older students especially in AP classes. It doesn’t matter. We didn’t care about classmates birthdays but my estimate is he was younger than the average in AP Calculus, older in AP Spanish.

I’m happy about how I raised my kid and where he ended up, actually I’m quite proud of it. Having a career is in my view a positive model for a child that can see the parent being engaged and a productive member of society. My kid absolutely loved career days.

Not sure which ap calc your kid took but mine took bc as a 15 year old. That’s smart. Your kid may be extremely smart but you held them back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree that some of these posters show troubling mental health signs. Really surprised the lack of boundary awareness. We are talking about kids here and people are speculating wildly about special needs, IEP, what was approved, with absolutely no shred of evidence. Ultimately that’s a private matter, leave it to the school and parents.

The comments about taking pleasure in someone’s (a child, none the less!) misfortune were truly repugnant. You’ve got to have a massive chip on your shoulder to stoop so low.

The competition these parents imagine themselves to be in is truly disturbing. The kid starting kindergarten later won’t steal anyone spot at a coveted college or a job later on, life is not that deterministic.

Also the strident chest beating about how great of a mother a poster is for taking care of her special needs child, and judging everyone else by how they compare against how much she did for her kid. Are we competing on who sacrificed most for their kids now? That’s what it seems. The bragging and inquiring about whose kid is more advanced in math, that’s a whole next level of insane competitiveness.

Unfortunately these harpies are lost, there’s no relief in sight, because they think of themselves as heroine mothers and models to follow, the very voice of common sense.

Lol no. The issue is an entitled set of NW moms taking up ALL the air in the room to get their own way. That’s no way to run a school system and we have seen very recent examples of where catering to a coterie of “concerned moms” was disastrous.

Yes this. All of the opposition is because people who think rules don't apply to them are grating. But then the UNW moms create a bunch of straw man arguments and vehemently defend them. That feels like 50 percent of this thread now.

I know! The other 50% is “look how much I did for my child, why can’t you do the same?”

In short, striver mom gets her ivy (lol) hopes high when her kid is taking calculus in 10th grade, only to see them shattered by actual college admission results. Meanwhile, lower “stats” kid gets into UVA. Initially she can’t even comprehend it, but it finally dawn on her, the kid was redshirted, an unfair advantage that negated all her hard work throughout the years. All that kindergarten reading, the algebra in 6th, the tutoring, it was for nothing because her kid was the youngest in the grade, a massive handicap to those in the know.

So she does what any rational person would do, troll internet posting boards, seeking validation of her parenting skill and spewing venom on redshirted kids and their parents. It’s really cathartic at the end of the day, and much cheaper than therapy. Not as effective though, her rants are getting more and more unhinged.

This is a perfect example of a straw man argument . Thank you!

But you’ve been so forthcoming with sharing personal details in your life especially about giving parents advice on how to raise their kids.

For real though, what college did your kid go to? Because with all the advice you’re dishing out, forgive me, but I want to make sure you’re legit and the final outcome is worthy of paying attention to you. If it’s below William and Mary don’t say anything, we get it, I won’t push it further and you have my sympathy.

My kids are not in college yet but it’s clear you held back to game the system. You did it for your ego vs your kids. I could not care less the ranking and hope mine go to an affordable school so we can pay for college and grad school. Except in a few fields no one cares about rankings except someone like you.

You just proved the point we are making about people like you who are gaming the system. I feel for your kids given how competitive you are.

Why is it gaming the system to hold back a kid until he’s ready to enter kindergarten?

Don’t you want all the kids to do well?

Because they are bigger, stronger, taller, faster, start puberty early for their grade and have more developed brains than the age level kids in their grades. Those factors impact almost everything.

The physical traits only matter in sports and those are by age. The intellectual abilities are not as connected to age and more with learning.

I don’t believe it’s an advantage, but if you believe those things, why didn’t you redshirt you kid? I still don’t understand what the issue is if some parents want to advantage their kids and send them later. We don’t blink an eye at tutors and expensive private schools.

So, why did you hold back? No, intellectual abilities are partly due to IQ, partly hard work, baring any sn or learning disabilities. Older doesn't make you smarter or more intellectual. It makes you less intellectual as you are not with true peers and with younger peers with lower expectations. When expectations are lowered that's not smarter, that's gaming the system.

One of my kids is very short regardless. At 17 they are still very short. Should I have held them back 3-4 years to hope they'd grow more?

Some of us put a lot of effort into our children’s nutrition, I wonder why you couldn’t do the same, it’s not that hard. When they were young it was like a had another extra job making sure they always had home cooked nutritious meals. They’ve never had junk food or sugary drinks!

Consult with their pediatrician, we were advised three servings of dairy per day, and make sure they eat about 1 gram of protein a day per pound of body weight. That’s a lot of meat, eggs, fish. Don’t even think about restricting food amounts if it’s clean, teenager boys eat a lot! In 6th grade my kid grew from 5’1” to 5’6”, it was crazy to watch.

My kid doesn’t drink juice or any bad drinks and just milk and water. Of course we all cook. Even pack every school lunch. That has nothing to do with height. It is genetics.

Since you put so much effort into food, why didn’t you put the same into academics and extracurricular activities?

Maybe the issue is that the food does not taste good. Do they say they like it, see them eating it, or maybe throwing away secretly? Cook fresh instead of doing a large batch for the week. Only saying it because that’s what I did as a child and the portions were often too small. I was very skinny.

If the child is in the bottom 20 percentile of height, I’d look first at nutrition, especially if it’s a boy. Talk to an endocrinologist, do regular checkups, tell your concerns to the pediatrician. The “genetics” you’re talking about may be human growth hormone deficiency which is treatable.

Last, spend less time on forums biatching about redshirted kids and more on your child who seems to be in a state at terrible neglect.

Wow, read the room lady. You're doing nothing but turning fence sitters strongly against you.

So you can tell people how to raise their kids, opining about how to educate them when to send them to school, criticizing their choices etc, but when the favor is returned regarding the way you raise yours, that’s off the limits.

Hopefully you learned something, but I doubt. This energy is better spent on your child, instead of your imaginary fight with other parents, which frankly is only happening in your head. You have no agency over the entire matter.

I’m serious about the hormonal part though. You should check with their doctor.

NP but "when to send them to school" is a question of law, not opinion. Criticising people for breaking the law is not the same as assuming short kids are malnourished based on spite.

That’s not what I understood from Eric Goulet letter. There seems to be flexibility on when kids start kindergarten and there was abuse by district officials. The proposed solution was that kids start kindergarten in the fall.

Never assume to understand anything because Eric Goulet says it.

There is no flexibility on this other than what was provided to parents previously against policy by principals trying to curry favor.

I’d rather go by an official statement from a board of education member instead of “I’ve read it on DCUM “.

Unless you have a link to substantiate your claims.

I think the person you’re replying to may be affiliated with one of the admins publicly named in the letter, which clearly stated the flexibility is derived from in DC Municipal Regulations 2201.6 and has always been used in the district historically to defer kindergarten enrollment. This poster is clearly not telling the truth and is likely stirring up something to cover abuse of power by district officials.

If you want more proof, Eric Goulet will testify today, if he didn’t already do it, to the DC Council and is publicly calling for official investigations into Chancellor Ferebee and his staff’s conduct.

I new it! I mean, “I’ve heard it from teachers and principals” versus a school board member testimony in front of the DC council.

Is Ferebee making his secretary write supportive posts on DCUM? That low even for him and it’s a waste of his secretary’s time. Lol.

Well “DC Municipal Regutions 2201.6” doesn’t appear to cite to anything so …

DC code on compulsory school attendance
https://code.dccouncil.gov/us/dc/council/code/titles/38/chapters/2/subchapters/I

Enrollment handbook. See "Grade Level Enrollment" subsection on p. 9
https://enrolldcps.dc.gov/sites/dcpsenrollment/files/page_content/attachments/SY25-26_DCPS_Enrollment_Lottery_Handbook_FINAL_Eng.pdf

DC Regulations Chapter: 5-E20 referenced in the enrollment handbook. See section 5-E2004 "Eligibility for Admission"
https://www.dcregs.dc.gov/Common/DCMR/RuleList.aspx?ChapterNum=5-E20&ChapterId=242

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree that some of these posters show troubling mental health signs. Really surprised the lack of boundary awareness. We are talking about kids here and people are speculating wildly about special needs, IEP, what was approved, with absolutely no shred of evidence. Ultimately that’s a private matter, leave it to the school and parents.

The comments about taking pleasure in someone’s (a child, none the less!) misfortune were truly repugnant. You’ve got to have a massive chip on your shoulder to stoop so low.

The competition these parents imagine themselves to be in is truly disturbing. The kid starting kindergarten later won’t steal anyone spot at a coveted college or a job later on, life is not that deterministic.

Also the strident chest beating about how great of a mother a poster is for taking care of her special needs child, and judging everyone else by how they compare against how much she did for her kid. Are we competing on who sacrificed most for their kids now? That’s what it seems. The bragging and inquiring about whose kid is more advanced in math, that’s a whole next level of insane competitiveness.

Unfortunately these harpies are lost, there’s no relief in sight, because they think of themselves as heroine mothers and models to follow, the very voice of common sense.

Lol no. The issue is an entitled set of NW moms taking up ALL the air in the room to get their own way. That’s no way to run a school system and we have seen very recent examples of where catering to a coterie of “concerned moms” was disastrous.

Yes this. All of the opposition is because people who think rules don't apply to them are grating. But then the UNW moms create a bunch of straw man arguments and vehemently defend them. That feels like 50 percent of this thread now.

I know! The other 50% is “look how much I did for my child, why can’t you do the same?”

In short, striver mom gets her ivy (lol) hopes high when her kid is taking calculus in 10th grade, only to see them shattered by actual college admission results. Meanwhile, lower “stats” kid gets into UVA. Initially she can’t even comprehend it, but it finally dawn on her, the kid was redshirted, an unfair advantage that negated all her hard work throughout the years. All that kindergarten reading, the algebra in 6th, the tutoring, it was for nothing because her kid was the youngest in the grade, a massive handicap to those in the know.

So she does what any rational person would do, troll internet posting boards, seeking validation of her parenting skill and spewing venom on redshirted kids and their parents. It’s really cathartic at the end of the day, and much cheaper than therapy. Not as effective though, her rants are getting more and more unhinged.

This is a perfect example of a straw man argument . Thank you!

But you’ve been so forthcoming with sharing personal details in your life especially about giving parents advice on how to raise their kids.

For real though, what college did your kid go to? Because with all the advice you’re dishing out, forgive me, but I want to make sure you’re legit and the final outcome is worthy of paying attention to you. If it’s below William and Mary don’t say anything, we get it, I won’t push it further and you have my sympathy.

My kids are not in college yet but it’s clear you held back to game the system. You did it for your ego vs your kids. I could not care less the ranking and hope mine go to an affordable school so we can pay for college and grad school. Except in a few fields no one cares about rankings except someone like you.

You just proved the point we are making about people like you who are gaming the system. I feel for your kids given how competitive you are.

Why is it gaming the system to hold back a kid until he’s ready to enter kindergarten?

Don’t you want all the kids to do well?

Because they are bigger, stronger, taller, faster, start puberty early for their grade and have more developed brains than the age level kids in their grades. Those factors impact almost everything.

The physical traits only matter in sports and those are by age. The intellectual abilities are not as connected to age and more with learning.

I don’t believe it’s an advantage, but if you believe those things, why didn’t you redshirt you kid? I still don’t understand what the issue is if some parents want to advantage their kids and send them later. We don’t blink an eye at tutors and expensive private schools.

Some sports have ethical policies that go by age not grade, to prevent this nonsense. I have smart kids, good IQ's and we prepared them academically and support as needed. Maybe if you tried that....

He does great academically even without me putting a lot of effort into it. With my career I wouldn’t have the time anyways. He has always been more independent and mature compared to other kids. Based on grades, AP scores and extracurriculars (captain of the varsity swim team) we’re targeting top schools.

Where does your kid go? If it’s around Boston they might end up close, fingers crossed!

This is a pretty typical profile. The more you post, the more you look silly as no reason to hold back. How do they do swimming outside hs where it is age based? How do they just have hs swim as an extra curricular. That’s only like three months out of the year. Funny how competitive you are. It’s sad you admit you put no effort in and your career comes first. He isn’t more mature or independent. He’s one to two years older so he’s equal or less due to the age gap. I feel bad for kids like yours where parents have all kinds of d of priorities that aren’t their kids being first. You held back for you, not him.

Don’t tell me how to raise my child I won’t tell you how to raise yours. Same with family priorities.

Really don’t get what your beef is or why you feel bad. How was that a “bad” outcome for the child? The kid turned out fine, maybe it would have been fine either way. If anything it is an indication that redshirting is not detrimental. In the end it’s a smart kid, doing great academically and socially that has a bright future ahead. That’s the dream of every parent. Mission accomplished, moving on to the next chapter in life.

You aren’t raising your kid. You are too busy with your career. These kids are not smarter and brighter nor more mature. They are with younger peers so you need to put them with age appropriate peers to compare. They may not survive in college never having to work hard or be challenged.

A total of 14 AP scores of 5 throughout high school would beg to differ. In high school the age matters less, there a lot of mixing between younger and older students especially in AP classes. It doesn’t matter. We didn’t care about classmates birthdays but my estimate is he was younger than the average in AP Calculus, older in AP Spanish.

I’m happy about how I raised my kid and where he ended up, actually I’m quite proud of it. Having a career is in my view a positive model for a child that can see the parent being engaged and a productive member of society. My kid absolutely loved career days.

Not sure which ap calc your kid took but mine took bc as a 15 year old. That’s smart. Your kid may be extremely smart but you held them back.

Same, he was in 9th grade, it worked out fine. So what if they were held back, there no prize on who graduates high school the youngest. Holding back worked for us, I don’t see why you are so aggravated by this. Serious trying hard to understand, but I don’t get it.