Do both partners get involved in financial planning and execution

[Anonymous]

Just wondering if both the partners involve in financial planning and execution. In my case DH is very much laid back. He does not blow any money but very reluctant to do any research, get educated in finance stuff or in execution. Wondering how is it your household?

[Anonymous]

I am the do-er financially, but DH doesn't stand in the way of progress. If he won't make the time to understand it, then I will take the lead. He probably likes this arrangement.

[Anonymous]

Most homes have one person. Probably best that way.

My DW wanted to understand (but didn't) and will have a 1000 questions on the smallest of things (same things each time we discuss). She would also not not take ownership of any aspect of finances (e.g. research mortgage rates or talk to a broker) but wanted to only question every decision I made.

It got really annoying really fast.

We tacitly agreed that I manage the money and she leaves me alone.

[Anonymous]

We have different things. DW pays most utilities, taxes, insurance, credit card, and other joint recurring bills, and she keeps a spreadsheet of the things our savings are allocated for. I gather all documents and prepare and file our taxes. She takes the lead on car purchases and maintenance; I handle pet-related expenses and most travel (though of course we discuss big things in advance).

We discuss things like tax withholding and retirement contributions but I am usually the one to bring them up and she just brings the form I fill out to HR.

I was also the leader on deciding when to buy a house and doing the research on it, though of course she looked at listings and what house we bought was a mutual decision. I handled most of the stuff with the realtor and mortgage, while she did insurance. Now I'm thinking about a rental property--she's open to the idea but has said that she doesn't want to do the legwork on it and will go with what I think is best.

So I'd say I take the lead on the big rare stuff (with the exception of car-buying--an area of interest for her and not me!) and she takes the lead on the smaller but more frequent occurrences. That's worked out pretty well for us.

[Anonymous]

Big decisions require agreement from both parties. And both are aware of what's going on in a general sense. But I (dw) am the primary planner and executor.

[Anonymous]

Financial decisions together, DH usually executes.

[Anonymous]

Dh has minimal interest. But, Neither one if would make a major personal financial decision without jointly discussing it and being in agreement.

That said I make an insane amount of money and inside on of my businesseses I would make a million or multi million dollar investment without consulting dh. And he doesn't care.

[Anonymous]

My husband used to do all the finances and we met at the dining table once a week to review. After the house was paid off I took over the monthly utilities, credit card payment. He does the big financial accounts. We still meet at the dining room table once a week.

We never argue about money. Everything is planned out.

[Anonymous]

We are on mint and look at it regularly. On the last Sunday of the month, after the kids go to bed, we have a "state of the union" to go over goals, investments, and upcoming large expenses. DH handles all investing

[Anonymous]

Play to your individuals strengths and interests. If your DH isn't interested, you'd probably do a better job. I do think both people in a relationship should at least be aware of what is going on financially even if they aren't actively doing the work.

[Anonymous]

Money stresses DH out, even though we make enough money to fully cover our needs and some wants. He largely avoides finances. I handle all of the finances - budgeting, bill paying, near and long term savings, retirement investment, etc. I grew up with a lot of financial fragility, and that baggage influences my financial decisionmaking. I prefer to having the control, even as I urge my husband to get more involved. I eventually got DH to agree to an annual financial meeting, where we review the prior year's spending and develop spending priorities for the upcoming year. I wish we met monthly to go over any planned large purchases just so they're on my radar. DH spends very little most months, but on occasion needs/wants something expensive, and it can throw things off a little if I don't scale back my spending to accommodate his purchase(s).

[Anonymous]

I pay all of the bills and my DH manages our investments. However we both meet with our two key investment advisors twice a year. Separately, my DH manages about 20% of our net worth on his own - mostly private equity investments.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am the do-er financially, but DH doesn't stand in the way of progress. If he won't make the time to understand it, then I will take the lead. He probably likes this arrangement.

Same here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Big decisions require agreement from both parties. And both are aware of what's going on in a general sense. But I (dw) am the primary planner and executor.

+1 We're always pretty much on the same page but DH has absolutely no desire or interest to spend time on financial planning and execution while I do.

[Anonymous]

I plan and execute, DH rides along.