Closed friend died and I want to ask for sometime
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Anonymous
| A very dear friend of mine passed away recently and I want to ask her spouse for a ring that I gave her years ago. It means a lot to me because it represents a time we spent together that was joyful. Do you think I could ask with out sounding like a total creep? |
Anonymous
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Then wait some more. Then keep waiting. DO NOT bother a grieving spouse about this at such a time. MAYBE a year from now, but for now you need to be showing up and contacting only for support. |
Anonymous
| Thanks. That is what I will do. And if I never see it again I will still have her wonderful memory. |
Anonymous
I totally agree. My MIL died 9 years ago and I still remember the 'friend' who asked my FIL for a necklace before she'd even been buried. It was so offensive. |
Anonymous
| and if the ring is worth anything, offer to pay for it so as to avoid any implication that you are taking the opportunity to be grabby. |
Anonymous
| Ask for picture of the ring and get a copy made. Problem solved. |
Anonymous
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I don't see how this could ever be appropriate. I would be horrified if you did this 5 or 10 years later. The ring was a gift to your friend. It does not belong to you. Just because you feel some way about it doesn't make it any less awful that you want it back.
Yuck op. |
Anonymous
I really emphatically disagree. My brother passed away a few years ago and if someone had come and asked for a momento after a respectful amount of time I would be happy to look for it and I'd appreciate that someone else was still missing him and thinking about him. |
Anonymous
| Does the ring remind you of a sexual relationship? |
Anonymous
| I wouldn’t even ask years later. It’s not yours anymore. |
Anonymous
Well, let's be real here. Jewelry is jewelry. If it's a silver ring with little value, fine; maybe. But even then, jewelry usually has some value, and is personal. My grandmother had an onyx and silver ring that she wore ALL the time--almost no monetary value, but it was "her thing," so it had a lot of value indeed. A cup or a leather keychain or a book or something is one thing. A piece of jewelry is different. |
Anonymous
| Different strokes for different folks I guess. I just had a close relative pass and this type of request wouldn’t have bothered me at all. I’d actually think it was pretty sweet considering how close you and the friend were. Shrugs shoulders |
Anonymous
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Of course you can ask, and sooner rather than later if her stuff is going to get put into boxes or given away. I would NOT be offended by such a request. |
Anonymous
| I would find this to be impertinent and weird, to be honest. |
Anonymous
yes |