Friends Wife Made a Pass At Me

[Anonymous]

It was surreal. She's not particularly hot, and I am in a relationship. I didn't act on it, and sort of just moved away, then left. But now I'm not sure what to say to him.
He is a good friend. Not a best friend or anything. His wife is nice. I've met her a dozen times or so.
This happened last week when we were out. We were all drinking and having a good time at a house party. Somehow i found myself alone with her outside (I smoke, i know bad habit) I was talking to someone else, who finished his cigarette and went back in. Suddenly she appeared from nowhere, we spoke a bit and she kept getting closer, complaining about the cold. I didn't make much of it, and then suddenly she leans over for a kiss. She catches my lips, but i immediately turn my head. I told her i was sorry (don't know for what) and left. I remember this perfectly because it was so cringeworthy.

I get an email two days later from her telling me how much regrets what she did and how she just had a fight with her husband and that I've always been so nice to her. She begged me to not tell him. She also said she was a bit drunk and just finds me cute overall.

I decided I won't tell him. Nothing happened after all. I see her again yesterday, and we act like nothing happened. She has a few cocktails, and while sitting at the bar with my girlfriend, she starts playing footsie with me. She then puts her hand on my thigh. I decided to move chairs and then leave. I sent her an email that night telling her that she needs to stay in her lane and that I am going to tell her husband if this continues, especially because she may be doing that with over people.

There is a part of me that wants to tell him anyway. But if he stays with her, then my relationship with him is likely over.

[Anonymous]

I personally wouldn’t say anything. Your friend will likely just blame you/she would lie and say you came on to her. Although you do have her first email so you can defend yourself at least. But I doubt he will leave her if she fakes contrition and didnt actually sleep with you. You’re not interested in her so doesn’t sound like there is a real risk that you will slip up and do something wrong. She sounds super gross and desperate. Yikes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I personally wouldn’t say anything. Your friend will likely just blame you/she would lie and say you came on to her. Although you do have her first email so you can defend yourself at least. But I doubt he will leave her if she fakes contrition and didnt actually sleep with you. You’re not interested in her so doesn’t sound like there is a real risk that you will slip up and do something wrong. She sounds super gross and desperate. Yikes.

Yeah, that's my concern. They've been married 4 years now. Together 6. I would say he isn't the best husband. He once put her down in front of a couple of people, and I defender her. Since then I think her attitude towards me changed. She appreciated that I put him in his place. He can be a bit of a d*ck, especially when drinking. Since I am not close with him, I don't know if he's been faithful, but nothing ever indicated that he's strayed.

Like you said, he may just blame me for once sticking up for her and manufacturing this infatuation.

[Anonymous]

Not only is she a tramp but a stupid one as well!! You have the proof in your email, lol.

Depends how much of a good friend he is. On one hand it's sad he's stuck with that and apparently it's going to end at some point. True some blame the post man for bad news.
I wouldn't be alone with her in any circumstance. I always wonder why people get married to begin with when they can stay single and date.

[Anonymous]

Even if her dh is a big D, she's still married to him. Not to mention she knows you're in a relationship.

Doing it the 2nd time is really dumb.

[Anonymous]

Yea, I'd stay quiet and avoid her as much as possible. If she sits next to you, move away. She's trouble, and I'd say you're right, telling him will just wreck your friendship with him.

[Anonymous]

I can see why she did it the 2nd time. She’s hoping she can break down your walls.
Makes sense. Maybe after you gave it a bit of thought, you changed your mind.

I would do it. I bet she’ll be wild.

[Anonymous]

So if she was hotter you would have kissed her back? Seems weird that you mentioned her looks as part of the reason for the rejection.
I bet if she was a 10 you would have been all over her

[Anonymous]

Her husband wants to watch

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can see why she did it the 2nd time. She’s hoping she can break down your walls.
Makes sense. Maybe after you gave it a bit of thought, you changed your mind.

I would do it. I bet she’ll be wild.

Ha! You're just asking for trouble!

[Anonymous]

Don't say anything. She doesn't sound happy.
Just warn her that if she does one more thing you WILL tell her husband.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't say anything. She doesn't sound happy.
Just warn her that if she does one more thing you WILL tell her husband.

Actually don't do that. Don't give her an ultimatum or else she'll call your bluff.

[Anonymous]

You are going to lose the friendship anyway, so might as well take her up on it

[InAndOut]

Anonymous wrote:It was surreal. She's not particularly hot, and I am in a relationship. I didn't act on it, and sort of just moved away, then left. But now I'm not sure what to say to him.
He is a good friend. Not a best friend or anything. His wife is nice. I've met her a dozen times or so.
This happened last week when we were out. We were all drinking and having a good time at a house party. Somehow i found myself alone with her outside (I smoke, i know bad habit) I was talking to someone else, who finished his cigarette and went back in. Suddenly she appeared from nowhere, we spoke a bit and she kept getting closer, complaining about the cold. I didn't make much of it, and then suddenly she leans over for a kiss. She catches my lips, but i immediately turn my head. I told her i was sorry (don't know for what) and left. I remember this perfectly because it was so cringeworthy.

I get an email two days later from her telling me how much regrets what she did and how she just had a fight with her husband and that I've always been so nice to her. She begged me to not tell him. She also said she was a bit drunk and just finds me cute overall.

I decided I won't tell him. Nothing happened after all. I see her again yesterday, and we act like nothing happened. She has a few cocktails, and while sitting at the bar with my girlfriend, she starts playing footsie with me. She then puts her hand on my thigh. I decided to move chairs and then leave. I sent her an email that night telling her that she needs to stay in her lane and that I am going to tell her husband if this continues, especially because she may be doing that with over people.

There is a part of me that wants to tell him anyway. But if he stays with her, then my relationship with him is likely over.

Drop the matter. Stay away from her, and especially avoid any situation where the two of you are alone.

[Anonymous]

Let it go. She will move onto to someone else. There is nothing to tell her husband.