Am I about to be told my kid has ADHD?
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Anonymous
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Quick version - 6 years old, 1st grade. Super athletic, sociable and energetic. Also bright, though tends to rush through things to want to be 'first.' History of anxiety - diagnosed as 'sensory' when he was a toddler, but those issues (physicality, fear of loud noises and costumes, etc) have all but disappeared. Anxious kid who needs to know what the plan is for the day, etc. Sweet and empathetic, but can have trouble 'toning it down.' Doesn't like TV or movies much, but will watch sports or Ninja Warrior for a good chunk of time. Behaves perfectly during sports practices, often moreso than the majority of the kids (mentioning this because seems contrary to email below).
Got this email yesterday, meeting with the teacher tomorrow. I would like to know a bit more about [Johnny]. I am concerned that some of his behaviors that disrupt the class and others. His behavior is not mean. He is a very kind and caring boy. That being said, he will blurt out answers in the middle of class and talks over others. He will get up and move around to see what others are doing and chat. His work does not reflect how bright he is because of his "hurry up and get done" approach to work. During quiet reading time, he can not be quiet nor attend to reading a book. It has been noticed by the specialists also, and therefore I wanted to bring it to your attention. We can have a phone conference or meet, if you like? Let me know what you prefer. Please know how much I enjoy [Johnny]! He is energetic and definitely keeps me on my toes. I'll wait to hear from you. Typical kid stuff, or something more (yes I will ask her this)? Feeling a bit anxious (also a trait in my family, that he seems to have inherited - also have a younger boy who's not that way)... would also appreciate stories of those who have kids like this, and how they've dealt with it. Thank you! |
Anonymous
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A teacher can't diagnose ADHD.
She is telling you he's struggling with certain tasks and behaviors in the classroom. I would imagine they will tell you they'd probably like to do an evaluation so that supports and interventions can be considered. You can agree to that, refuse it, or choose to seek an outside evaluation. ADHD is one possibility, so is an anxiety diagnosis or someting else. |
Anonymous
| Anecdotal story here but my son has the same profile as yours - sensory diagnosis, all of the things you said. Now he's a 16 year old boy who was diagnosed with ADHD at 11, medication has been a life saver for him. |
Anonymous
How's he doing now? Just not sure what any of this might mean, or if his ability to be a 'perfect student' during sports etc is relevant. He's also doing very well on the spelling tests etc so I'm not sure about her comment about his work not reflecting his ability - he's never been good at comprehension (though he can read), but in K we were told that was age appropriate. Thanks for any thoughts! - OP |
Anonymous
| Yes, it is possible he has ADHD. You can ask for assessment by the school psychologist, or take him to a psychologist yourself. He could also have anxiety. Anxiety in kids can look like ADHD. It's also common to have both ADHD and anxiety. |
Anonymous
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Hi OP, I don't think the school thinks this is typical kid stuff as it seems they have brought in specialists to observe him. I am assuming this is the School psychologist or guidance counselor.
I agree with the 2nd poster. They are probably at the point where they need your permission to evaluate him formally. His teacher sounds great and she really put a lot of thought into letting you know it is the behavior and not your child that is problematic. Seems like she will be a great asset as you partner to figure out if your child needs additional support. |
Anonymous
I think the teacher means he is hurrying through some assignments and so making a lot of mistakes in areas where the teacher believes he actually could answer the question if he slowed down. It's common with special needs kids tobe fine in one grade and suddenly have a problem at the beginning of the next grade up because the higher demands in the next grade exceed his abilities. |
Anonymous
| These passive aggressive emails from teachers crack me up. Keeps me on my toes. That’s faint praise. |
Anonymous
Same but DX at 9 and now is 11. I was hesitant about medicating such a young child but, on days when he forgets to take the meds in the AM, I can tell the minute he gets in the car to go home from school. I can only imagine how rough the school day was for him and the teacher. We decided to try the meds as a test and it made an immediate, positive impact. He was much happier too because he would get really upset about getting in trouble and his inability to control himself sometimes. Agree that teacher can't (or shouldn't) DX. They can and may recommend a screening. Your ped may have a recommendation or you can find a developmental ped. It can take a while to get an appt with a developmental ped so make appts with all that you can and also ask to be on the call list for cancellations. When we made appts, I think the earliest was 8 or 9 months out but we got in within 2 mos with a cancellation. My son is doing much better with medication. The meds aren't a magic bullet but it takes the edge off for him and makes it easier for him to regulate and control himself. I am hopeful that he'll eventually develop the ability to do this without any meds but we're not there right now. Also, my son is like yours in that he was pretty well behaved during sports. I think part of that is the physical exertion gives him an outlet and focus. The meds are worn off by the time he has sports after school and we haven't felt or seen the need to give him and afternoon booster. He doesn't take any meds on the weekends but we keep him very busy. He has sports practice every week night and 4-5 games between Friday PM and Sunday PM. It is a lot and would be way overkill from my other child but DS needs and craves it. Everyone would be miserable if he didn't have at least one game per day on the weekend. Good luck! |
Anonymous
Kids with ADHD can focus on some high interest tasks -- it is the inability to maintain focus consistently that is the issue. How is he doing socially? Does he have friends outside school or sports teams? Is he sought out by others? |
Anonymous
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I don't know, OP. Many schools don't want to bother testing your child, labeling him and providing IEP services, but they do want to get your help to figure out the best way to help him do well and not disrupt the rest of the class. I wouldn't jump to conclusions yet.
It's hard to tell from the email whether the teacher is overreacting or your child's behavior is really out of the norm. The email could have been written about my child at that age but I never got a single email. The teacher told me this type of thing verbally during the parent conference and then told me it was perfectly normal and she was unconcerned. No emails or issues raised by teachers in 2nd-4th. DS is in 5th now and doing fine academically. No diagnosis or any signs we need to test him either. I pay attention because we have another child with SN. |
Anonymous
| Does she mean specialists like the specials teachers (music, art, etc.) or specialists like the guidance counselor or resource teacher? My guess would be the former and that she's just telling you that it's happening on other settings and not just her class. |
Anonymous
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Teachers cannot pronounce the A word, or any other diagnostic word, which is really silly because lots of parents don't hints.
So have your kid evaluated at some point. Earlier is more complicated to diagnose, but later means he'll have more time to feel bad about himself. |
Anonymous
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Before moving to a formal evaluation, I would see if the teacher is willing to try some classroom interventions/accommodations. Maybe a behavior contract or checklist to keep him on task. Each target goal should be presented in a positive way -- e.g., sat quietly without getting up during circle time, read X pages of book during quite reading, raised hand to be called on without shouting out, etc.
And then some reward is tied to him achieving his goals. She also could use a timer to make sure he spends the appropriate amount of time on a particular task. |
Anonymous
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OP here - thank you all, so much, for your comments!
To address a few things: 1 - yes, he's super social, lots of friends, invitations, etc. He definitely prefers active stuff to Legos etc and I'm sure some kids prefer other kids to him because of that, but he seems well-liked. 2 - I also thought she meant specialists like the gym and art teachers. Didn't occur to me that it might be the counselor etc until this thread. I agree I'm jumping a bit to conclusions, but we were basically told last year that he's a handful at times but really it's normal for the age, etc. So this came a bit out of the blue. |