Do you expect spouse to come to your defense if someone calls you a name in their presence?

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10/14/2017 17:34

Subject: Do you expect spouse to come to your defense if someone calls you a name in their presence?

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Anonymous

We were at grandmother's for several days with SIL and BIL. He had not bathed and it was literally making us sick. (You could smell him five minutes after he had left a room) I finally came right out and asked him to bathe. He called me a real B---. My husband was siting right next to me and said nothing, didn't even respond. I left and went home but I'm really angry and wondering whether to confront husband.

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10/14/2017 17:36

Subject: Do you expect spouse to come to your defense if someone calls you a name in their presence?

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Anonymous

You publicly humiliated him and thought he would react well?

First you figure out who is the best person to talk to him, secondly that person talks to him in private.

You were a real bitch so I call that more reality stating than name calling.

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10/14/2017 17:41

Subject: Do you expect spouse to come to your defense if someone calls you a name in their presence?

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Anonymous

He was calling it like it is, so I wouldn't expect anyone to come to your defence.

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10/14/2017 17:45

Subject: Re:Do you expect spouse to come to your defense if someone calls you a name in their presence?

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Anonymous

What the PPs said. There's a thing called tact.

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10/14/2017 17:47

Subject: Do you expect spouse to come to your defense if someone calls you a name in their presence?

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:You publicly humiliated him and thought he would react well?

First you figure out who is the best person to talk to him, secondly that person talks to him in private.

You were a real bitch so I call that more reality stating than name calling.

100% agree. I fully support BIL’s reaction.

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10/14/2017 17:53

Subject: Do you expect spouse to come to your defense if someone calls you a name in their presence?

quote

Anonymous

Regardless of how the poster acted, I'd still expect my DH to publicly take my side. Then tell me at home that I was acting out of line.

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10/14/2017 17:57

Subject: Do you expect spouse to come to your defense if someone calls you a name in their presence?

quote

Anonymous

You were being a bitch. Your husband probably already thinks you're a bitch. Why defend the truth? He probably doesn't like you very much and doesn't care what people say about you

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10/14/2017 17:59

Subject: Do you expect spouse to come to your defense if someone calls you a name in their presence?

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:Regardless of how the poster acted, I'd still expect my DH to publicly take my side. Then tell me at home that I was acting out of line.

Why? If he agrees she's being a bitch why defend her? I'm sure this isn't the first time he's realized hes married to a miserable person. I wouldn't defend DH in this situation. I wouldn't want family to think I thought he said was ok.

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10/14/2017 18:08

Subject: Do you expect spouse to come to your defense if someone calls you a name in their presence?

quote

Anonymous

We don't hang out with people who call other names

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10/14/2017 18:08

Subject: Re:Do you expect spouse to come to your defense if someone calls you a name in their presence?

quote

Anonymous

Wow. I cannot believe you humiliated your BIL in front of everyone and you act like a victim. Were you raised by wolves? Did no one teach you tact? He shouldn’t have called you a name, but I’m not sure what your husband could have said to defend your atrocious behavior. I’m sure he was mortified.

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10/14/2017 18:09

Subject: Do you expect spouse to come to your defense if someone calls you a name in their presence?

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Anonymous

scuzzy family Op

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10/14/2017 18:10

Subject: Do you expect spouse to come to your defense if someone calls you a name in their presence?

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:We don't hang out with people who call other names

I don't hang out with people who are rude like OP.

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10/14/2017 18:12

Subject: Do you expect spouse to come to your defense if someone calls you a name in their presence?

quote

Anonymous

If someone called my husband names in front of me, I would be so surprised I would not perhaps have the wherewithal to say something. The insult always reflects more on the person saying it than on the intended target.

And in the case you described, you started it, so there's also that...

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10/14/2017 18:13

Subject: Do you expect spouse to come to your defense if someone calls you a name in their presence?

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:Regardless of how the poster acted, I'd still expect my DH to publicly take my side. Then tell me at home that I was acting out of line.

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10/14/2017 18:15

Subject: Do you expect spouse to come to your defense if someone calls you a name in their presence?

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Regardless of how the poster acted, I'd still expect my DH to publicly take my side. Then tell me at home that I was acting out of line.

+1

But there is no taking the OP’s side here. How do you possibly defend such disgusting behavior?