Do you let you 17- or 18-year-old high school senior visit friends at college?

[Anonymous]

Overnight? Entire weekend? Diff rules for son and daughter (date rape)?

[Anonymous]

no. that's something they'll have to wait until college to do.

[Anonymous]

An overnight would be okay if they are applying to that school. Remind them they get in trouble, they probably won't get in. Also, it has to be a mom approved college kid, not some friend of a friend.

[Anonymous]

No. Agree with 12:40.

--parent of a 16 year old

[Anonymous]

A friend of mine recently did this. Her son decided to drive home instead of the agreed upon plan to stay at his older brother's place, and he got a DUI on the way home. It might be kid dependent, but I probably wouldn't take the risk.

[Anonymous]

We did. DS as a senior drove to Virginia Tech to see a male friend, spent the night, interviewed at W &L the next day and then drove on to UVA where he stayed with a female friend all on his own. The kids he visited were family friends that DS has known all of his life, and are like siblings. I'm am quite sure he wasn't a saint on the trip but it was a very independent thing to do and he was proud of his ability to navigate the world on his own. It was a one-time trip though! We would not have allowed a second trip.

[Anonymous]

My daughter showed me on social media that dozens of her classmates were at UVA a couple weeks ago tailgating and partying. Many of the girls were 16yo juniors. All from well to do families, good schools, good grades.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:no. that's something they'll have to wait until college to do.

+1. Regardless of what they say, it's really not an appropriate environment. Ours also didn't do overnight college visits and now as a college student has verified that parents would be surprised at what their teens do when they're on college campuses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My daughter showed me on social media that dozens of her classmates were at UVA a couple weeks ago tailgating and partying. Many of the girls were 16yo juniors. All from well to do families, good schools, good grades.

Just wait till "Halloweekend" at JMU. Can't understand why people let their HS students take those trips.

[Anonymous]

My kids were 16.5 when going off to college. So when they were HS seniors, they did not visit college campuses without a parent.

[Anonymous]

Yes to both overnights and weekends if it is a friend we have met and like. Yes to overnights regardless, if they're considering applying to the school. I only have DD's, so no idea whether my rules would differ by gender.

For my kids who turn 18 partway through high school, I no longer place restrictions on their social outings as long as they don't disturb the household when they return home.

[Anonymous]

Do you let your kid sleepover at a trusted friend's house if no parents are home? Same thing. If I trust the friend and I'm OK either the proposed sleeping arrangement, I'd allow it. If you're so worried about your DD being irresponsible, then you probably shouldn't go cold turkey next year anyway...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you let your kid sleepover at a trusted friend's house if no parents are home? Same thing. If I trust the friend and I'm OK either the proposed sleeping arrangement, I'd allow it. If you're so worried about your DD being irresponsible, then you probably shouldn't go cold turkey next year anyway...

No.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No. Agree with 12:40.

--parent of a 16 year old

+1

--parent of 19 and 14 year-old DSs.

[Anonymous]

No. I used to visit my college friends when I was in high school and every event involved drinking and unacceptable behavior. I'm surprised I survived!