Wait until Spouse has job to initiate divorce?

[Anonymous]

DH is unemployed 100% by his own decision. He is tinkering on a few projects and living on savings from a chunk of money he made 6 years ago. Savings is running low. I have a job. Marital issues are increased over our marriage and I see that things are not going to change, and I do not want to live with them.

Should I wait until he has a job to separate? I don't want to pay alimony and I want him to have the option to buy me out of the house he wants.

[Anonymous]

I'd consult with an attorney in order to determine when the best time to initiate the divorce. There are a lot of factors that come into play and you will be better served by speaking with an attorney.

[Anonymous]

Do you have kids? Will he expect to get custody?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd consult with an attorney in order to determine when the best time to initiate the divorce. There are a lot of factors that come into play and you will be better served by speaking with an attorney.

Any suggestions for a Maryland lawyer? Inside beltway or Rockville? I live in MoCo but we don't have many assets. Two young kids so custody is my primary issue.

[Anonymous]

Does your DH stay home with the kids?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does your DH stay home with the kids?

Kids are in school and full time day care. He does take the older one to aftercare activities.

[Anonymous]

Yes. I'd wait.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Does your DH stay home with the kids?

Kids are in school and full time day care. He does take the older one to aftercare activities.

That is a yes he takes care of the kids while you work.

[Anonymous]

OP: What does your boyfriend think you should do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP: What does your boyfriend think you should do?

Ha! A boyfriend is the last thing I want at this point!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Does your DH stay home with the kids?

Kids are in school and full time day care. He does take the older one to aftercare activities.

That is a yes he takes care of the kids while you work.

Please expand upon your point. He does this because he isn't working. It isn't that he's not working to do this.

[Anonymous]

You'll get 50/50. You will pay him child support, (because your kids deserve that money). You may have to pay short-term alimony.

When he goes back to work, you will rework the child-spousal support.

[Anonymous]

Let this be a warning to you men thinking about marriage: 1) women file for divorce when the money runs out, and 2) even if you (the man) are the primary caregiver your wife is still going to sue for full custody.

Here's hoping that OP's DH has some extra cash squirreled away so he can hire a good lawyer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Let this be a warning to you men thinking about marriage: 1) women file for divorce when the money runs out, and 2) even if you (the man) are the primary caregiver your wife is still going to sue for full custody.

Here's hoping that OP's DH has some extra cash squirreled away so he can hire a good lawyer.

Women file for divorce when men don't have a job. Male unemployment is the number 1 predictor of divorce. Women don't like to be married to unemployed men. Is this honestly shocking to you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Let this be a warning to you men thinking about marriage: 1) women file for divorce when the money runs out, and 2) even if you (the man) are the primary caregiver your wife is still going to sue for full custody.

Here's hoping that OP's DH has some extra cash squirreled away so he can hire a good lawyer.

This an interesting warning ... based on a different fact pattern than the one I initially posted about. DH has opted to not make any money for 6 years. His children have been in full time daycare and school for the entire time. He now takes one kid to soccer practice s night a week instead of being in aftercare. For the previous time I've been the primary caregiver (doctors, drop off and pickup sick days etc even though I was working).