Any Parents Privately Disappointed with College Placement?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I couldn't agree with 13:37 more. My goal for my kids was to send them to a school where they would learn how to *learn,* to learn how to study; to think critically and to be exposed to great teaching in a stimulating environment. From the list of college acceptances at our school, I assume my kids will do just fine. I think there's a better shot of getting into a very good school from private when you're not necessarily at the top of your class then if you're in the middle at a big public. I could care less about the Ivy League - there are so many first-rate colleges and universities in this country and great grad schools also. In addition, I assume that my kids will be very well prepared for college as a result of their education in high school, unlike their dear old mom.

But a kid who is in the middle of his class at an academically competitive private perhaps would have been at the top of the class at a public.

That's an ignorant statement.

Nothing ignorant about my statement if you read the "perhaps" in it.

Perhaps your statement is full of bull.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I couldn't agree with 13:37 more. My goal for my kids was to send them to a school where they would learn how to *learn,* to learn how to study; to think critically and to be exposed to great teaching in a stimulating environment. From the list of college acceptances at our school, I assume my kids will do just fine. I think there's a better shot of getting into a very good school from private when you're not necessarily at the top of your class then if you're in the middle at a big public. I could care less about the Ivy League - there are so many first-rate colleges and universities in this country and great grad schools also. In addition, I assume that my kids will be very well prepared for college as a result of their education in high school, unlike their dear old mom.

But a kid who is in the middle of his class at an academically competitive private perhaps would have been at the top of the class at a public.

Maybe, it's equally possible that without the supports offered by an academically competitive private, the kid would have struggled more, or that middle of the class is his comfort zone and he'd end up in the same approximate place (or maybe middle of the honors classes) anywhere. There's no way of knowing. Send your kid where you think they'll be happy, learn how to learn, and become the person they were meant to be. Not the place that will give you the best class rank.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids are too young to know what kind of students they will be in high school. However, I do know that what I want for their pre-college education is lots of experiences in a variety of subjects (including art, music, etc.), the development of good work/study habits, and a love of learning. They are at a rigorous academic school right now, and one thing for which we will watch is whether their schools become too much of a pressure cooker at some point. If it does, we will make a change. Based on where things stand currently, it likely would not be a public school, but who knows where school budgets and classes in things like the arts will be at that point?

When it comes to college placement, I want them to go to the colleges that best suit them depending on their interests at that time. I don't care if it is a top 25 school - and I went to one.

Where are people getting the idea that public schools do not teach art, music, work/study habits and instill a love of learning? My public schools did; my kids' public school does. Which ones don't?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids are too young to know what kind of students they will be in high school. However, I do know that what I want for their pre-college education is lots of experiences in a variety of subjects (including art, music, etc.), the development of good work/study habits, and a love of learning. They are at a rigorous academic school right now, and one thing for which we will watch is whether their schools become too much of a pressure cooker at some point. If it does, we will make a change. Based on where things stand currently, it likely would not be a public school, but who knows where school budgets and classes in things like the arts will be at that point?

When it comes to college placement, I want them to go to the colleges that best suit them depending on their interests at that time. I don't care if it is a top 25 school - and I went to one.

Where are people getting the idea that public schools do not teach art, music, work/study habits and instill a love of learning? My public schools did; my kids' public school does. Which ones don't?

The highly-rated public I went to, for one... I'm sure many people fare better, but my experience at a "great" public school made me willing to shell out large amounts of money for my kid to have a different education.

[Anonymous]

We live in Fairfax county, with an excellent high school. We moved here specifically for the public HS. So now our kids are going to a private HS!! First, in order to get into a really good college from a ppublic HS in Fairfax, your MUST have a super high gpa and have taken ALL AP/honors. That is becasue college counselors know even the best public high schools are easier academically than privates. The privates have smaller classes, excellent teachers that are very responsive to parents that pay high tuition, and more creative teaching. They are much more rigorous. Becasue the colleges know this, they have a bump up on getting into the better schools. As far as "caring less about the ivy league" that is just ignorant and small town thinking. even tho this country has become more diverse and understanding, they ivies STILL rule this country. The connections, the education etc is just beyond comprehension. And yes, if you pay scads of $$ to a private you do expect the second reason--in addition to the quality education and personalized attention--is acceptance into a very good college. My children love thier private school. It is student oriented. The very large, very bureacratic public high school here would cause them to be lost souls. Not to mention large classes.In the public high schools, the curriculum is excellent--however their teaching method consists of "throw them in the water and tell them to swim". My kids homework at their private is rigorous and in depth learning. The public school homeowrk was busywork, rote learning and superficial fact memorization. My kids did well but they were bored. School was a chore. Now, they LOVE learning!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We live in Fairfax county, with an excellent high school. We moved here specifically for the public HS. So now our kids are going to a private HS!! First, in order to get into a really good college from a ppublic HS in Fairfax, your MUST have a super high gpa and have taken ALL AP/honors. That is becasue college counselors know even the best public high schools are easier academically than privates. The privates have smaller classes, excellent teachers that are very responsive to parents that pay high tuition, and more creative teaching. They are much more rigorous. Becasue the colleges know this, they have a bump up on getting into the better schools. As far as "caring less about the ivy league" that is just ignorant and small town thinking. even tho this country has become more diverse and understanding, they ivies STILL rule this country. The connections, the education etc is just beyond comprehension. And yes, if you pay scads of $$ to a private you do expect the second reason--in addition to the quality education and personalized attention--is acceptance into a very good college. My children love thier private school. It is student oriented. The very large, very bureacratic public high school here would cause them to be lost souls. Not to mention large classes.In the public high schools, the curriculum is excellent--however their teaching method consists of "throw them in the water and tell them to swim". My kids homework at their private is rigorous and in depth learning. The public school homeowrk was busywork, rote learning and superficial fact memorization. My kids did well but they were bored. School was a chore. Now, they LOVE learning!

Perhaps the idea if a child getting lost in a large class is not as daunting as you think. Your kid probably is not the one that would get lost.
You could just hire a private college counselor and get the same benefit as 4 years of private school tuition.
But if you have the money, who cares

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kid wouldn't make it into a top school regardless of whether she was in private or public. She's a great kid but she's only a fair-to-middling student. She shifted from public to private because the private school is what she needed at that point in time. She is a better, more committed student because there is an incentive to do well at her private school. That's why we're spending the money on private school, not college placement.

I'm not worried about the fact that she won't go to a top 25 university. I've known lots of successful people who did not go to top schools. I'm more concerned she attend a school that fits her.

Best to think about what suits your kid at that particular time and not worry about college. People with toddlers will be surprised at how their best laid plans have a way of going haywire when it comes to what children end up doing/being as they grow older.

+100. Well said! I completely agree with this post. We're in a similar situation. I happen to think private schools are best for the mediocre students. Like the poster above, I'm not concerned about a top 25 university. I know lots of successful people and most of them just went to their state university. (My DH actually went to a top 5 school, and he and his friends are successful. However, the classmates with whom I went to school (at a big state university) are also very successful, and they don't seem any less happy for having gone to a big state school. Private secondary school can be worth it for the experience and the skills, not just for where it gets you into college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DC attended what many of you on this forum would consider a second-tier, local private school and thrived there. DC now attends a university which all of you on this forum would consider the very top tier. It matters not so much where you attend school, as what you make of the school you attend and the education you receive.

Our high school senior attended a similar private school, but I do believe that attending private in DC's case was helpful in many ways. DC was not that assertive in earlier years, and probably would have been a bit lost in a larger public school, even if DC did well in classes. The smaller private made it easier for DC to find opportunities -- extracurricular and academic -- in middle school that set DC up well for high school and go from there. By senior year, the college counselors knew DC very well and that probably also helped with the college admissions.

[Anonymous]

All I know is that a 35 ACT and 800 math 2 SAT with meh grades at a big 3 got absolutely no competitive admits for my kid. Big waste.

[Anonymous]

Are you that NCS poster again?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All I know is that a 35 ACT and 800 math 2 SAT with meh grades at a big 3 got absolutely no competitive admits for my kid. Big waste.

Most people don't realize that B+/B grades at a private school, absent possibly a legacy, athletics, wealth, or diversity angle, will not get you into the "best" universities.

[Anonymous]

I know several families who take great pride in the top private schools their children attend(ed), as well they should. Their students went on to Sewanee, University of Maryland, Lehigh, Connecticut College. Most private school students in the middle of their classes attend good, but not stellar colleges. Of course, athletics, legacy, great wealth or importance, or connections, may change that equation. That is not the reason to attend a top private.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All I know is that a 35 ACT and 800 math 2 SAT with meh grades at a big 3 got absolutely no competitive admits for my kid. Big waste.

Wow. That sucks. Tests are meaningless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All I know is that a 35 ACT and 800 math 2 SAT with meh grades at a big 3 got absolutely no competitive admits for my kid. Big waste.

Fake comment.

[Anonymous]

Middle of the pack kids at strong privates have more polish, soft skills, and writing chops than all but maybe the top 2% of public grads. It's not all about SAT, grades, or college placement. Savvy private kids will flourish at UVA ... I've known wicked smart public kids who felt like isolated rubes at Ivies.