First night without kids and so sad

[Anonymous]

I am recently divorced after my husband had an affair. Tonight is the first time my kids have stayed at his house and I am so sad. I miss them terribly. I am so mad at myself that I have sent him nasty texts about what an asshole he is. Please tell me it will get better.

[Anonymous]

It will get better. It's hard to imagine right now, but it will. I'm sorry you are hurting. I know how awful it feels.

[Anonymous]

Make a list of all the things you want to do when you don't have kids around and just consult your list each time they are leaving. And stop sending nasty texts. He'll just say "this is why I had to get away from her crazy ass."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Make a list of all the things you want to do when you don't have kids around and just consult your list each time they are leaving. And stop sending nasty texts. He'll just say "this is why I had to get away from her crazy ass."

This. Before you send him any single communication, ask yourself, "will this help our relationship or my kids?"

[Anonymous]

Oh man, that's got to sting. It's not fair he screwed up and now you have pay for it. I'm sorry op. I hope it gets better soon! For what it's worth, I bet those kids miss you too! Draw them a picture, make them a card, I bet it will make them happy.

[Anonymous]

I'm sorry, OP. Be kind to yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Make a list of all the things you want to do when you don't have kids around and just consult your list each time they are leaving. And stop sending nasty texts. He'll just say "this is why I had to get away from her crazy ass."

+1

XH already went around and tried to paint me as a crazy b****, and we are in the middle of a tenuous divorce. However, I am going to fantasize today that I,could send him some nasty texts and call him an asshole,for what he did. Thanks for giving me a moment to live vicariously through today.

[Anonymous]

Try to concentrate on what you can do in your kid free time. I was in the same situation and I remember how hard it was. But being a single parent for years is harder because of the cumulative effect, so just remember years from now you will be glad to have the break. I promise!

[Anonymous]

As PP said, knock it off with the texts. Trust me on this. He is still their father, they love him and they need him now more than ever. I speak from experience as a child of divorce whose father cheated on mom and mom went crazy post-divorce. Either your kids will turn on you, or more likely, when they get old enough, they will delete both of you from their lives.

[Anonymous]

One wonders... if you're the cheater and you wind up divorced, are you sad on nights without the kids? Do you regret cheating? Did you ever think your cheating would lead to not seeing the kids half the time?

[Anonymous]

I'm sorry, I know it's a hard adjustment. But see this as an opportunity to focus on yourself. Before you know it, the kids will be grown and gone. Maybe take a class or make an effort to socialize on your "off" nights?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am recently divorced after my husband had an affair. Tonight is the first time my kids have stayed at his house and I am so sad. I miss them terribly. I am so mad at myself that I have sent him nasty texts about what an asshole he is. Please tell me it will get better.

I think I see why you are divorced.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am recently divorced after my husband had an affair. Tonight is the first time my kids have stayed at his house and I am so sad. I miss them terribly. I am so mad at myself that I have sent him nasty texts about what an asshole he is. Please tell me it will get better.

I think I see why you are divorced.

I think I see why he cheated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am recently divorced after my husband had an affair. Tonight is the first time my kids have stayed at his house and I am so sad. I miss them terribly. I am so mad at myself that I have sent him nasty texts about what an asshole he is. Please tell me it will get better.

I think I see why you are divorced.

I think I see why he cheated.

Yep

[Anonymous]

So ... you are mad at YOURSELF so you send your EX nasty texts?

I think you have your priorities wrong.