My mom asked (told) me that I should have my DD call her

[Anonymous]

Ok, what does DCUM say, my mom - out of state, widowed/retired, asked orvmore like told me that I should have my DD agev10 call her. My mom would LOVE it if my DD called daily, but DD doesn't want to irvask to call my mom. What's reasonable? Sometimes I ask DD to call my mom but she really doesn't want to.

[Anonymous]

Aww i feel for your mom. I'd encourage DD to call frequently (maybe even once per week) and emphasize how much it means to her.

[Anonymous]

Can your mom do Skype? My kids are much more talkative when they can see who they are talking to.

[Anonymous]

Make it an easy 'call every Sunday at this time' kind of thing: I think it would be harder if it was random. If your DD knew she was going to call then, and that your mother was expecting, it would take some of the stress out. Try and present to your daughter what a gift this is - to have a grandmother wanting a relationship directly with her.

[Anonymous]

I vote for once a week. Wish I had done this with my DD.

[Anonymous]

Once a week is totally reasonable. And tell your mom that if she uses her time to guilt DD about not calling more, it will drive DD to want to call her even less.

[Anonymous]

I don't do it. I get repeatedly asked, but I don't tell my DD. I never called grandma when I was her age, now I can bs with Grandma for hours. All in its time.

[Anonymous]

Ugh, I would hate such an unreasonable request. The most my kids could do is once a week, but they would NOT relish the thought of nattering away with Grandma.

Does your mother often ask impractical things of you, OP?

[Anonymous]

Skype or call once a week is appropriate. Or once every two weeks. Let your mom that DD may not want to chat long.

[Anonymous]

Once a week. Once a day is outrageous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't do it. I get repeatedly asked, but I don't tell my DD. I never called grandma when I was her age, now I can bs with Grandma for hours. All in its time.

Grandma may not have that time. I'm in favor of doing anything you can within reason to make parents' end of life the best it can be. Nagging DD is an easy request relative to other things she could be asking and you may regret it if you don't put the effort in to make it happen.

[Anonymous]

When I was growing up my mom would occasionally put me on the phone to say hi to my grandparents during her calls with them so it was only for a few minutes. That might be an easier approach then having a specific call from your DD to your mom.

[Anonymous]

Does your mom or your DD text? Maybe they could email?

[Anonymous]

Aw- isn't this something to encourage your daughter to do? Wouldn't you hope that your future grandchildren call you sometime. You have to model what you think is right, and isn't this right?

It is our responsibility to instill these values in our children. I'm assuming your mom isn't some terrible person or nag. She's lonely and would like to maintain a bond with her grandchild.

[Anonymous]

We FaceTime both sets of Grandparents every Sunday night. DD talks to them for maybe 5 mins tops. Then we talk to them for another 5 mins. If we miss them for whatever reason, we don't sweat it and try again next week.