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After a long struggle with secondary infertility we have decided to pursue adoption. We are open to many other factors but really want to adopt a newborn girl through domestic adoption. We have a biological son. I have contacted a number of agencies, and none of them allow gender preferences. Does anyone know any that do? We are not interested in International adoption.
Thanks! |
| Not that I am aware of. And I know you said you are not interested in international adoption but China allows gender selection when adopting. We have adopted two girls from China. Ironically, now, however, it is generally a longer wait for girls than it is for boys when you are adopting from China. More boys available. Perhaps fewer special needs. |
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Ask more questions. What the agency might mean is they do not let parents out right put down a preference on their app or on info provided to pregnant women.
But the reality is that adoption situations always state the gender of the baby. You can google for domestic adoption situations and see agencies or facilitators with lists. so in practice you can simply ask the agency not to present you to any pregnant women who are not expecting a girl. |
| Can I ask why, OP? Because if you were open to a biological child, you would have accepted what you had, right? So why does adopting a child make this different? |
| American adoptions will allow it |
OP here. No they don't. I called and asked and they no longer offer the option to choose gender. |
OP here. Unfortunately I had to go through a lot of IVF to try to get pregnant with a second child (none of it worked). Since we were going to do PGS testing anyway, we could have found out the gender that way. I feel like there is so much risk with adoption anyways (same with IVF), that I would like to have one thing to have some control over (gender). |
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Sorry but that is a BS answer.
You want one of each, just say it. |
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We adopted almost 5 years ago through adoption together. They have Offices in Va and Md. When we did it we could specify gender preference, We didnt because we didnt care and were told we would most likely get boy because AA boys are harder to place than AA girls.
We actually got a girl which is funny but we didnt mind either way. So unless theyve changed it try them. Dont have any preconceived notions on gender though. We are 2 gay women and not girl in the slightest. We thought a boy would do better with us than a girl. Our daughter is the love of our lives though, she can be a tomboy one minute aned run around with the boys but also loves her dresses, she has a dance recital over the weekend and there I was putting on lipstick for her and doing her hair. Wouldnt have it any other way. |
Not OP but what the hell is wrong with you? Who died and put you in charge of "acceptable" reasons for gender preference? |
NP here. Adoption is supposed to be about finding families for children who need them, not filling orders to fulfill adoptive parent fantasies. |
Who are you to say what adoption "is supposed to be about"? |
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Are you also the OP of this thread? http://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/641770.page
Honestly, you sound too picky. With biological children, you get what you get. I have 4 bio children of the same sex. None of the other sex. One of my children has a birth defect. I never drank a drop of alcohol, did drugs, smoked, etc. You get what you get. |
Ok, but that's not the reality of adoption. It would be nice but adoption is a greedy selfish industry that prays on desperate parents who will do anything to adopt. |
| American Adoptions does |