Are there any adoption agencies that allow gender preference?

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05/24/2017 18:35

Subject: Re:Are there any adoption agencies that allow gender preference?

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:OP, not to pile on, but I seriously have to ask if you’ve given one smidgen of a thought or any consideration to the biological mother in your wish list? So, you want a newborn. And a girl.

You’re going to go through the process – put your family out there with an agency, who will be looking for a pregnant woman who chooses to put her baby up for adoption. She gets to choose the family. She will look at several - possibly hundreds of family profiles, pictures (probably), lifestyles, and make this HUGE decision of which family her unborn baby will go to.

Then the baby is born. It’s a boy. You will seriously just walk away and leave her? She would be crushed. I know, because this happened to someone I know. She cried for months when she found out she was pregnant. Agonized over hundreds of families, wanting the best for her child. Picked a family that she got to know – and who got to know her. Then, for reasons I won’t say here, when she gave birth, that family walked away. She was broken.

So, good luck in handpicking your child in a way that you pick a dog from the kennel. I really hope you decide against adoption and just be happy with what you have.

I know a family who did that. They only wanted a girl and baby turned out a boy. They were in the hospital and in the delivery room. They literally walked out from what they said and didn't care. (they never ended up adopting). I desperately wanted a girl as I knew we'd only adopt one but I got a boy and never thought about turning him down. I cannot imagine a child more perfect for our family. It was horrific what they did.

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05/25/2017 11:27

Subject: Re:Are there any adoption agencies that allow gender preference?

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, not to pile on, but I seriously have to ask if you’ve given one smidgen of a thought or any consideration to the biological mother in your wish list? So, you want a newborn. And a girl.

You’re going to go through the process – put your family out there with an agency, who will be looking for a pregnant woman who chooses to put her baby up for adoption. She gets to choose the family. She will look at several - possibly hundreds of family profiles, pictures (probably), lifestyles, and make this HUGE decision of which family her unborn baby will go to.

Then the baby is born. It’s a boy. You will seriously just walk away and leave her? She would be crushed. I know, because this happened to someone I know. She cried for months when she found out she was pregnant. Agonized over hundreds of families, wanting the best for her child. Picked a family that she got to know – and who got to know her. Then, for reasons I won’t say here, when she gave birth, that family walked away. She was broken.

So, good luck in handpicking your child in a way that you pick a dog from the kennel. I really hope you decide against adoption and just be happy with what you have.

I know a family who did that. They only wanted a girl and baby turned out a boy. They were in the hospital and in the delivery room. They literally walked out from what they said and didn't care. (they never ended up adopting). I desperately wanted a girl as I knew we'd only adopt one but I got a boy and never thought about turning him down. I cannot imagine a child more perfect for our family. It was horrific what they did.

On the other hand, what if they had taken him and raised him and weren't able to get over the fact that they wanted a girl? Might it have been better for the baby to be raised by people who wanted him?

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05/25/2017 12:58

Subject: Re:Are there any adoption agencies that allow gender preference?

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, not to pile on, but I seriously have to ask if you’ve given one smidgen of a thought or any consideration to the biological mother in your wish list? So, you want a newborn. And a girl.

You’re going to go through the process – put your family out there with an agency, who will be looking for a pregnant woman who chooses to put her baby up for adoption. She gets to choose the family. She will look at several - possibly hundreds of family profiles, pictures (probably), lifestyles, and make this HUGE decision of which family her unborn baby will go to.

Then the baby is born. It’s a boy. You will seriously just walk away and leave her? She would be crushed. I know, because this happened to someone I know. She cried for months when she found out she was pregnant. Agonized over hundreds of families, wanting the best for her child. Picked a family that she got to know – and who got to know her. Then, for reasons I won’t say here, when she gave birth, that family walked away. She was broken.

So, good luck in handpicking your child in a way that you pick a dog from the kennel. I really hope you decide against adoption and just be happy with what you have.

I know a family who did that. They only wanted a girl and baby turned out a boy. They were in the hospital and in the delivery room. They literally walked out from what they said and didn't care. (they never ended up adopting). I desperately wanted a girl as I knew we'd only adopt one but I got a boy and never thought about turning him down. I cannot imagine a child more perfect for our family. It was horrific what they did.