OKCupid: how long to wait for a text/call after giving my number?

[Anonymous]

New to this, but after a couple days of messaging through the app, the guy gave me his number, so I replied with mine. This happened Friday, but he hasn reached out yet (on either the app or via phone).We had a good back and forth/he was responding quickly so I'm just wondering what happened and if I should move on? We are both 40s if that matters.

[Anonymous]

He's probably not going to reach out unless he's bored. OKC can be as fickle as Tinder. He probably spent his weekend with someone so if you do hear from him, it would be during the week. Consider it practice and start talking to others.

[Anonymous]

Yeah-let it be. Some men lose momentum once they have your number because they know they now need to act. It's very lame.

[Anonymous]

You gave him your number on a Friday. He either already has weekend plans and is waiting to text you until after the weekend, or he was sitting on your number in case his weekend opened up and he wanted a hook up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He's probably not going to reach out unless he's bored. OKC can be as fickle as Tinder. He probably spent his weekend with someone so if you do hear from him, it would be during the week. Consider it practice and start talking to others.

Not bored. Free. Occasionally you get more than one response to the mass messaging effort required to get the one response.

[Anonymous]

PP, if he was interested, he'd have reached out by now. Texting makes dating multiple people super easy. When a guy is really interested in a woman, he's not going to lose momentum because he doesn't want another guy to fill up her time instead. He was hedging his bets for a weekend hookup and found a better option. He's part of the trash you wade through in online dating, OP. It's nothing personal. On to the next.

[Anonymous]

Op here. Thanks. I'm sure you all are right, but how annoying! I thought the 45+ set would be past this. Oh well on to the next...

[Anonymous]

He gave you his number, so why didn't you text or call him to set up a date? He probably thinks you're passive aggressive now.

[Anonymous]

Unfortunately the 45+ can be the worst offenders of this. They don't want commitment if they've just come out of one; they have baggage etc

[Anonymous]

so you meet online on wed, gave him your number on fri? without any concrete plans to meet behind it? that's fwb moves at best, and probably how he took it too. Don't be disappointed, regardless of his weekend, you will hear from him in the next day or two

[Anonymous]

This is OP. 17:51 - could you elaborate? I'm past this guy and not interested in fwb, but for future reference I would appreciate your insight. We texted over OkCupid for two days maybe a total of 15 messages, seemed to connect, so I thought the next logical step was getting off the app to phones.

The last time I dated Bill Clinton was pres in his first term and there was no internet. Please, school me and others in the same boat!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. 17:51 - could you elaborate? I'm past this guy and not interested in fwb, but for future reference I would appreciate your insight. We texted over OkCupid for two days maybe a total of 15 messages, seemed to connect, so I thought the next logical step was getting off the app to phones.

The last time I dated Bill Clinton was pres in his first term and there was no internet. Please, school me and others in the same boat!

There was internet. You just didn't have it.

[Anonymous]

So next time don't give him your number online, text him from your number and ask him if he would like to meet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. 17:51 - could you elaborate? I'm past this guy and not interested in fwb, but for future reference I would appreciate your insight. We texted over OkCupid for two days maybe a total of 15 messages, seemed to connect, so I thought the next logical step was getting off the app to phones.

The last time I dated Bill Clinton was pres in his first term and there was no internet. Please, school me and others in the same boat!

I have been online for about 2 months and I still don't understand-I chat with someone back and forward for hours and then the next day nothing... Men say oh we must meet but then nothing... I don't understand!! Should I be more aggressive and suggest meeting myself?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. 17:51 - could you elaborate? I'm past this guy and not interested in fwb, but for future reference I would appreciate your insight. We texted over OkCupid for two days maybe a total of 15 messages, seemed to connect, so I thought the next logical step was getting off the app to phones.

The last time I dated Bill Clinton was pres in his first term and there was no internet. Please, school me and others in the same boat!

I have been online for about 2 months and I still don't understand-I chat with someone back and forward for hours and then the next day nothing... Men say oh we must meet but then nothing... I don't understand!! Should I be more aggressive and suggest meeting myself?

The only time online dating worked for me, I told him we should go out on Friday and picked a time and place. He said he'd talked to a ton of women who would chat for awhile then disappear or cancel the date after a week of messages. He liked he initiative.