Do both parents attend toddler birthday parties?

[Anonymous]

We only have one kid and kind of just do everything together without giving it a second thought. We were invited to a toddler's birthday from DS's daycare. Is it weird to have both parents attend a toddler birthday party? We're not good friends with the parents. This is kind of uncharted territory for me, so I don't want an etiquette slip-up.

[Anonymous]

Just one parent should go.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't blink an eye if both went.

[Anonymous]

Lots of couples attend toddler parties together...especially if they only have one child or a toddler and a baby. I have a handful of kids, and I've attended a million parties and observed this.

And why shouldn't they? It's not an intrusion...it's not like they will require a party bag or cake (although it's nice to offer food and drinks IMHO). Weekends are family time. Couples would rather spend time with each other and with their child than with random strangers from daycare/preschool at a 90 minute bounce house party. Plus, most people schedule errands or lunch or something else before or after the party, so it's more convenient to be together.

[Anonymous]

It's a mix, and either is fine. I did notice a definite decline in two parents attending parties as we moved up through the 2s, 3s, 4s, 5s, 6s....then the dropoff parties start and NO parents have to!

[Anonymous]

Sometimes toddler parties are a nice way for families to get to know each other. With two parents there, you can trade off helping watch the kids and visiting with other parents or helping the hosts with food and drinks. So I think it's fine for both of you to go, so long as you're making yourselves social and useful, rather than just sitting to the side and focusing on your own child.

[Anonymous]

It's fine. Maybe not typical, but fine.

[Anonymous]

DH and I always both take DD to all birthday parties. Weekends are family time. I have never been to any party where we were the only couple either and often all the kids have both parents there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's a mix, and either is fine. I did notice a definite decline in two parents attending parties as we moved up through the 2s, 3s, 4s, 5s, 6s....then the dropoff parties start and NO parents have to!

+1. We have an only, but saw parties as a chance for one of the adults to get some free time to do errands or work out or whatever. Since, let's face it, if your child is engaged in the party then it isn't really family time. But, there were always at least one or two couples at most parties I brought my DC to.

If it's in someone's home, especially if you know it's a smaller home, I'd think twice about it but especially at a larger venue, it's not a huge deal IMO.

[Anonymous]

Not an etiquette issue. You will be totally fine! DH and I attended many parties together. It was fun to meet families and have the chance to see how DD was handling the parties. Now we typically switch off, esp. as the number of parties grows.

[Anonymous]

It's fine and as PPs have said, typical if this is your only child. Not common if there's an older child in the mix.

[Anonymous]

We went together before we had a second, and many onlies continued to be accompanied by both parents. Just be clear in the RSVP, and enjoy! (It seems that the usual way that dads come is as part of a couple, and my husband likes that.)

[Anonymous]

We only did/do if we are otherwise friends with the parents. If not, the non-attending parent got (no longer since we have an older child now!) downtime or ran errands/did chores without a toddler underfoot.

[Anonymous]

I went to almost every birthday party solo. DH only comes if the parents are our friends. DH would rather do anything else than go to a stranger's birthday party to make small talk.

Now we have 2 kids and 1 on the way. We divide and conquer with parties, play dates and other activities.

[Anonymous]

This is interesting. My husband only took a child to a birthday party if he really had to ( ie forced). It wasn't his cup of tea so for the most part I took them to birthday parties and stayed when little but, just dropped off when they got older. My DH would have hated to go to every party as he doesn't like to make small talk unless he knows them well.

One party we thought was a drop off but,was not and everyone was forced to stay by the mom! It is actually funny because one Dad was like "I have to go food shopping!" but she said no and they all sat in living room.