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I'm 40s, divorced woman. Got to be friends with a much older colleague (late 60s) 5 yrs ago. At one point dated briefly but both decided against it, he moved away and travels a lot for work. I moved on but I'm now single again, as is he. We've always been in touch some.
Recently I've been between jobs and I was looking for a car and he offered to lend his spare, so I visited his place. He ended up insisting on helping me buy a car (paid 50% and would have paid all but I wouldn't). He also paid 6 months of rent for me, We both knew I needed it. He's always been very generous and keeps offering me to upgrade the car, pay for some expensive treatment I need, help me move and buy me home stuff etc. PS I'm starting a job & moving soon. etc. We do not have a romantic relationship except made out a bit a couple times , but neither is interested right now. I have questions about his sexuality too just by his mannerisms. He continues to be really sweet and sends me nice gifts etc . I feel guilty, I've asked him not to but he forgets and I think he's a shopaholic. And it's long distance so mostly phone and text. Would you just blissfully go on enjoying the friendship that others might misconstrue? |
| He is warming the fire so that he can roast his marshmallows |
| If he has the money to spend and you need it, and he's not buying you, I wold take it. Sometimes men like to feel like providers. |
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Would SugarMILF be less offensive to you?
Sounds like a perfectly fine (even awesome) relationship. |
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OP here - so surprised by the answers. I haven't told my friends, I'm afraid to be flamed, coz they wouldn't believe it's not sex for money type of arrangement. I think it's because neither of us is very experienced with relationships. He's been single >10 yrs and rather nerdy, and both of us have been in abusive situations in the past.
I think I feel a bit guilty because I have no plans for a romantic future. He says the same but a few times he's seemed to want a romantic/ close though not necessarily sexual bond (one reason I question his sexuality) . More like he wants a companion. And what if this keeps him from meeting the one? Perhaps I'm way over-analyzing. |
| Sugar MILF? Now I am listening. |
| You feel uncomfortable for a reason. And you know why. |
OP here - LOL! |
| My dad is one of those men... no good can come of it. |
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He is an older guy paying for your rent and your car.
Good lord. Yes he's your sugar daddy. |
+1 |
| He's getting more and more control over your life. How does that feel? |
| Some people have a lot of money and feel good sharing it with others, no strings attached. The aforementioned individuals are not that common, however. Only you can know which kind of person he is. If you're in touch with your instincts, trust them. |
| Some men have a fetish for spending money on women. I forget the term but it's a real thing. Even for women they only know online that they have no chance of meeting. There's a hashtag for the term on Instagram but I forgot what it is. |
Op here.. I think this is a bit of it. It's really quite remarkable. Thanks for all the replies, I'm a bit puzzled re the deleted posts... |