Dating a single parent im

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:at 2 and five, they go to sleep early. I could see with an 8 pm bedtime, a late night date with a babysitter. I do, however, wonder how you are dating for three months during COVID.

There have been multiple threads on this, so sorry for derailing OP's, but people are going to date.

I know from social media that many of my younger friends are just out there without a care in the world. I'm not so cavalier, but after a month of zoom dates as well as getting a decent feel for what someone is like through their social media, I was comfortable making a bit of a leap to meet someone in mid-May that has led to a relationship. No regrets.

OP is a huge dating risk though she travels for work. He's a dad with young kids, it's not just him he has to think about. He gets sick off OP, and he can't see his kids for weeks or possibly months.

[Anonymous]

You sure this guy is divorced? It takes just about 2 years to get divorced and he has a 2 year old...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You sure this guy is divorced? It takes just about 2 years to get divorced and he has a 2 year old...

Not all divorces are 2 years. Divorce probably started while ex wife was pregnant. I think it would be pretty hard to fake 50% custody.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I think it's incredibly selfish if you would go out with him knowing he is using a babysitter. He is a horrible parent!

This is nonsense. Just stop.

Seriously, stop. A horrible parent? That is ludicrous.

What would you suggest? He's picking a woman he barely knows over kids he sees half the time. His kids!

Ok, so married parents who get babysitters to go out for the evening are also horrible parents, because they are picking each other over their kids. Their kids!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the bigger red flag is that he has a two year old and has been dating you for months. Which means to me that unless he divorced his wife while pregnant he is newly out of a long term relationship and has not done the work to figure out why his past relationship did not work out.

OP here. We've talked and I'm comfortable with that part. My main concern is him using a babysitter to see me and is that a red flag.

Why are you dating a single dad? Gain some self esteem and find someone without baggage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I think it's incredibly selfish if you would go out with him knowing he is using a babysitter. He is a horrible parent!

This is nonsense. Just stop.

Seriously, stop. A horrible parent? That is ludicrous.

What would you suggest? He's picking a woman he barely knows over kids he sees half the time. His kids!

He’s getting a babysitter to go out with his girlfriend . CHILL.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the bigger red flag is that he has a two year old and has been dating you for months. Which means to me that unless he divorced his wife while pregnant he is newly out of a long term relationship and has not done the work to figure out why his past relationship did not work out.

OP here. We've talked and I'm comfortable with that part. My main concern is him using a babysitter to see me and is that a red flag.

Why are you dating a single dad? Gain some self esteem and find someone without baggage.

Are you kidding me?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MY exDH routinely gets a babysitter and he sees our kids only every other weekend and actually lives with the person he is going on dates with!!!!!!!!!!

This situation is different. It's 50/50

Your point makes no sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I think it's incredibly selfish if you would go out with him knowing he is using a babysitter. He is a horrible parent!

This is nonsense. Just stop.

Seriously, stop. A horrible parent? That is ludicrous.

What would you suggest? He's picking a woman he barely knows over kids he sees half the time. His kids!

Ok, so married parents who get babysitters to go out for the evening are also horrible parents, because they are picking each other over their kids. Their kids!

Married people see their kids every dy of evey week not 14 days out of month. 1 evening out of 30 is different than 1 out of 14.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it's more nuanced than that. How old are the kids and how frequently is he doing this? Are they little kids that go to bed at 8 and he proposes a date at 8:30 so they would be sleeping anyways?

This.

I think it could be in some ways a good sign. It means if you get into a relationship you probably will get to see him more than you would if he refused to ever hire a babysitter.

+1. WTF. Are only married people allowed to hire babysitters?

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I think it's incredibly selfish if you would go out with him knowing he is using a babysitter. He is a horrible parent!

This is nonsense. Just stop.

Seriously, stop. A horrible parent? That is ludicrous.

What would you suggest? He's picking a woman he barely knows over kids he sees half the time. His kids!

Ok, so married parents who get babysitters to go out for the evening are also horrible parents, because they are picking each other over their kids. Their kids!

Married people see their kids every dy of evey week not 14 days out of month. 1 evening out of 30 is different than 1 out of 14.

My DH traveled a lot for work, he saw the kids less than 14 days a month. We would still get a sitter and had our date nights.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

As has been explained multiple times, no one said divorced parents can't date. It's just that he already has limited time with his kids, and he's seeking to limit that time even further when they're very, very young.

50% is not limited, and they're asleep when he's using the sitter.

What is with the over the top crazy responses in this thread?

Most likely insecure housewives that dream of leaving their husband and “punish” him with 50/50. Then realize that they have zero control of that person or their children when the EXDH starts dating and horrors(!!!) uses a babysitter to continue their adult life. It’s the essential mommy martyr trope.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I think it's incredibly selfish if you would go out with him knowing he is using a babysitter. He is a horrible parent!

This is nonsense. Just stop.

Seriously, stop. A horrible parent? That is ludicrous.

What would you suggest? He's picking a woman he barely knows over kids he sees half the time. His kids!

Ok, so married parents who get babysitters to go out for the evening are also horrible parents, because they are picking each other over their kids. Their kids!

Married people see their kids every dy of evey week not 14 days out of month. 1 evening out of 30 is different than 1 out of 14.

My DH traveled a lot for work, he saw the kids less than 14 days a month. We would still get a sitter and had our date nights.

And that was shitty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

As has been explained multiple times, no one said divorced parents can't date. It's just that he already has limited time with his kids, and he's seeking to limit that time even further when they're very, very young.

50% is not limited, and they're asleep when he's using the sitter.

What is with the over the top crazy responses in this thread?

Most likely insecure housewives that dream of leaving their husband and “punish” him with 50/50. Then realize that they have zero control of that person or their children when the EXDH starts dating and horrors(!!!) uses a babysitter to continue their adult life. It’s the essential mommy martyr trope.

We know why you're divorced.

[Anonymous]

All I can say is I never want to see another single parent proclaim in a thread " my kids come first.". Ever. Because it's a lie.