Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Not my genre, so no, I wouldn't read it.
Nonetheless, what is your main character's character flaw, and how does the plot you describe play into to her recognizing her issue? In what way will she change at the end of the book? Will she recognize the flaw and do something about it, even a little? Or will it be her undoing because she can't see or or refusing to change?
I mean you have the classic structure: girl meets girl, girl falls for girl, girl gets girl and we have some fun and games, then girl loses girl. But other than sexual attraction, you have no why or how or character change. No story. Your problem is with your third paragraph which is where you should be telling what the story actually is -- instead you give a vague sense of "issues come up and things go bad." But you need to figure out what those issues are, what goes bad, and why anyone would care or identify with that part?
Is your main character a chronic liar who weaves a web of deception and ends up alone because she can't tell anyone the truth, even herself?
Is your main character a prude who can't admit her prudish facade and judgment was wrong, and so instead of seeking forgiveness she has an epic fall from social grace?
Is your main character obsessively ambitious and using the work chick to get ahead, only to have it all come tumbling down when the "all is lost" moment happens?
Is your main character in self-denial, and cannot achieve happiness with her new love until she allows herself room to be selfish and put her true needs ahead of her oblivious husband, dog, hamster, and 3 spoiled kids in the suburbs?
And remember, if in the end she loses the girl, you need an epic false victory, because usually in the end she wins the girl back after a false defeat. But maybe it's the husband she has to win back?
OP here: Lots of good advice. Thank you.
Basically both women experience sexual fluidity.
the protagonist (K) falls for a woman who is Jewish (L) and L has an off and on again boyfriend
L’s family’s view is conservative and she very much cares what they think and they want her to marry her T. (On and off again boyfriend).
They meet because K’s best friend is cousins with L. K has been invited over for Shabbat. Ks family is conservative too, but they are Christians. K has branched out over the years and has discovered her views do not align with her family and she’s progressive.
When they first meet each other over Shabbat, , it’s bizarre and surreal how much K is intrigued by L. She’s heard a lot about her (she’s a medical resident)
and how she will be doing part of her rotation in Ks hometown. What intrigues K about L is her natural beauty and smarts.. Dark hair with
alabaster skin and beautiful eyes that have a gold tone to them.
Little by little they get to know each other and the hypnotic way L stares at K, gives K goose bumps that
tingle her at the core and give her forbidden sexual thoughts, that she eventually admits to after trying to deny its existence.
Long story short. Through serendipity they end up alone in the house because K goes back to retrieve an item she left after visiting. After an exchange of words and L catching K before she trips over an item, they slowly stare into each other’s eyes and eventually they let go of their inhibitions. They explore each other and exhaust themselves through the releasing ecstasy of sex and a symphony of orgasms.
While they keep their relationship under wraps and all is well for a while. Eventually L’’s on and off again
boyfriend proposes while she takes a leave to go back to
New England, where her boyfriend is also a medical resident and where they are both finishing training. L says yes. She leaves permanently back to New England to finish residency and breaks things up abruptly with K. This sends K into a deep depression and she seeks help and admits limerence for L
Years later they reunite by fate but by then L is already married, while K is not.
but seeing K again ignites the fire in L that she tried putting out years ago. L and K end up
working at the same hospital ; now L is an attending physician there while K works in administration. . Things heat up and proximity makes for a inevitable face to face interaction ...
so many questions left unanswered and now it’s Ks chance to know why..
There is a plot twist but I’m working on it lol
But this is it for now
Thoughts ? Opinions ...
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