Do you regret your family size?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have 2 - 1.5YO and 3YO. I'd be lying if sometimes I didn't wonder "what if we stopped with 1". DS2 is a much harder child than DS1. I love my family, I adore my kids, but honestly I could see it being much easier with just 1.

I guess I will also add DH and I knew we only wanted 2. I'm an only and he's oldest of 3 boys but we knew we wanted 2 as close in age as possible. Our marriage couldn't handle another, I know that for sure.

[Anonymous]

Have one, another on the way, and then I'm DONE DONE DONE. DH would love a third, but I'm pushing 40, and he's not the one that has to be pregnant and go through labor!

[Anonymous]

We wanted two, got twins (total surprise) and our family has felt complete since the day they were born and neither one of us has ever wanted another child. Our twins are the same gender, but we've never felt like we're missing out on having the other. We were both one of two kids but my brother died so now I'm sort of an only child. Still never made me want more kids, though.

[Anonymous]

We have three and when they were young, there was definitely chaos and sleepless nights and all that goes with that. But they are now older teens and I'm so happy we had three because it's a lot of fun and I like the noise and commotion. It's a better chaos if that makes sense.

[Anonymous]

I have 3 ages 9,7 and 5. The house is full of laughter and joy. I would have had one more if finances would have allowed. Happy with 3.

[Anonymous]

We have 4 kids. We are done, mostly due to finances.

I feel happy having 4, DH and I both love having a big family. I think that we might have had more if we had met earlier (DH and I met in our 30s). But then I think about the logistics of having more than 4 kids (car, play dates, activities) and think that 4 is as good as it gets if you want a big family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have two. I wish that I was the type of parent that could handle more because I think down the road, lots of kids is a huge gift. But I recognize my limits. So two it is. No regrets.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just me and DH and no regrets.

What are you doing in the General Parenting Discussion forum of the DC Urban Moms and Dads website, then?

Because a husband and wife aren't a family? No wonder there are so many divorced people on this website.

[Anonymous]

Always wanted 4 but now I have 2 and that feels like more than enough for me. Parenting is much harder than I imagined! No, I do not regret not having more because I know we made a good decision in sticking with 2, but I sometimes do still long for more.

[Anonymous]

I have 3 and always wanted 4 but couldn’t due to infertility. (Did IVF for all kids I have and finally it didn’t work). If I was fertile and could plan have sex and get pregnant I 100% would have had 4 kids.

That said, my youngest is now & and I’m really glad we only have 3. We can provide a much better life for 3 kids than 4. I think I’m a pretty awesome mom to my 3 kids and we’re able to travel internationally, the kids do whatever activities they want to, etc. however, we’re at our limit with 3. I couldn’t drive another carpool each week or fit in any more concerts or games. We’re 100% tapped out. We’re currentky traveling in Europe for spring break and having an amazing time. But it’s feeling expensive to take multiple kids on vacation. Just eating out (and we’re not going high end) is $100 a meal. We can afford it with 3 but it’s about our max.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does anyone out there have one and wish they had none? One and wish they had gone for a big family? Have a big family and wish they had stopped at one? Interested in knowing if anyone out there feels that they have screwed up their family planning and why.

What good will this thought process go? How can you close the barn door once the horse has escaped?

[Anonymous]

I have two. Wish circumstances were such that we had 3, but I’m pretty confident we made the right choice given our situation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:have 1 right now. We are young but have had many health issues since having our DC.

Always thought we'd have 2 or may be even 3 but health has been really really really hard. Not sure what to do, actually.

Any suggestions? ha

What are the health issues? Hard giving you advice without more details.

DH has has 2 hip reconstructions and 1 back surgery in 6 months. We're both young, young 30's. All surgeries unexpected. I am exhausted. He hasn't physically been able to do much of anything for the entire time we've had our DC but we both thought we'd have more kids. I just don't know if I'm being a 'baby' about all of this or if it's normal for me to think may be this is it.

I don't think you're being a baby at all. Being a single parent must be hard, not to mention having to take care of your DH.

If all these issues with Dh’s Health will resolve in a year or two, i don’t see why you can’t expand the family then. You are both still young and have lots of time. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

My husband has a brother with Downs syndrome and believes his father regretted having had him. That's the only example I know of when a parent regretted having a child. Most people I know do not regret having their children.

[Anonymous]

We have two, and I’d love to have three (or four). But DH is not on board. I’m one of 5 and have always wanted at least 3-4 kids.