Worked my butt off in the PTA and my son is in a "weaker" classroom

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op again- I just needed to get it out. Obviously I can't discuss it IRL.

No worries. It sounds as though you've worked this all out in your own mind now so that you won't be burdened by this when school starts back up.

Yeah, no. I will now only commit to what directly benefits my child. The school was approaching me with other requests and I will now have an easier time turning them down.

[Anonymous]

Op here: I feel I can't go ask about the "bad chemiistry" child because, well, he is either in our class or the other class. I can't say "don't disrupt us, disrupt them". And going into details about how he usually hits those who are closest to him is just not appropriate.
I think my mistake was giving 3 preferences. I should have stuck to one like the year before.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:it seems like you should spend your time working for $$$ to be able to afford to live in a better school district rather than volunteering at the Title I school.

+1. The OP comes across as a total PTA busybody mom cliché.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here: I feel I can't go ask about the "bad chemiistry" child because, well, he is either in our class or the other class. I can't say "don't disrupt us, disrupt them". And going into details about how he usually hits those who are closest to him is just not appropriate.
I think my mistake was giving 3 preferences. I should have stuck to one like the year before.

Go into the year with an open mind. The bad chemistry kid has had a summer to mature and you don't know...maybe someone has been working with him on his behavior. Focus on your child and what your child needs. If his seating arrangement isn't working out, let the teacher know that you think that your child would do better at the front of the classroom or whatever....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. To clarify, there are kids with aides, one in each class, it's all good.
I am fully ok with the teacher my son got. And, it's ok, he can live without his good friend.
The disruptive child is not picking on my son only. He is equal opportunity aggressive to whoever is close to him not all the time of course. But I wanted to minimize their interaction.

Then in that case it's possible the majority of parents could have asked to not have their DC with him. What then? The poor kid is just ostracized so the school can grant all the requests?

I was more sympathetic when I thought your son was target by this boy specifically.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here: I feel I can't go ask about the "bad chemiistry" child because, well, he is either in our class or the other class. I can't say "don't disrupt us, disrupt them". And going into details about how he usually hits those who are closest to him is just not appropriate.
I think my mistake was giving 3 preferences. I should have stuck to one like the year before.

Go into the year with an open mind. The bad chemistry kid has had a summer to mature and you don't know...maybe someone has been working with him on his behavior. Focus on your child and what your child needs. If his seating arrangement isn't working out, let the teacher know that you think that your child would do better at the front of the classroom or whatever....

Yeah let's hope. I know his mom though and I don't think she worked on his behavior, not her style.
He hit a friend last year (they were sitting at the same table) and the friend's mom asked to have the seated separately. It somehow leaked to the other mom and she told me she was hurt by that request. I believe it says a lot about how she raised the kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't they try to balance the classes with high achievers, average students, special needs, etc... just relax he will be fine. Kids have to learn how to deal with their adversaries.

Diversity is not adversity.

I think the reference to adversaries meant the kid her son didn't get along with.

[Anonymous]

I call troll bc no school like this has only two classes per grade!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here: I feel I can't go ask about the "bad chemiistry" child because, well, he is either in our class or the other class. I can't say "don't disrupt us, disrupt them". And going into details about how he usually hits those who are closest to him is just not appropriate.
I think my mistake was giving 3 preferences. I should have stuck to one like the year before.

Go into the year with an open mind. The bad chemistry kid has had a summer to mature and you don't know...maybe someone has been working with him on his behavior. Focus on your child and what your child needs. If his seating arrangement isn't working out, let the teacher know that you think that your child would do better at the front of the classroom or whatever....

Yeah let's hope. I know his mom though and I don't think she worked on his behavior, not her style.
He hit a friend last year (they were sitting at the same table) and the friend's mom asked to have the seated separately. It somehow leaked to the other mom and she told me she was hurt by that request. I believe it says a lot about how she raised the kid.

Don't talk about the kid. Don't talk about the mom. Focus on your child and what your child needs. Give the teacher some credit and give him/her a chance to work this all out.

FWIW, my son who is pretty laid back, easy and really good in general (my own completely unbiased opinion of course, lol) came home upset one day that a boy who had given him a really hard time the year before had been assigned to his classroom. Of course I was alarmed especially since it was not like my son to be worried about another kid like that. You better betcha I kept my hand to the track that whole year ready to step in and advocate for my son if necessary. It wasn't necessary. It all worked out.

Hang in there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Let me get this straight. You view PTA volunteers as having some sort of "deal" wherein their children get the better classrooms and teachers?

Wow. So, working parents who can't do PTA just have to put up with the bad classrooms.

Yup, that's pretty much what OP is saying. Charming, isn't she?

She thought she had an unspoken deal. Why?

Op I would tackle the specific issue with one other student. That's it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So you "volunteered" because you thought it would curry you favors with the principal with class placement? If you'd just stuck to sharing about how frustrated you were that your communicated request for separating your child from another wasn't met, I would have offered some helpful advice. But you had to throw in the part about expecting some preferential treatment because you volunteered.

You're an idiot, OP. You fail to see how your kid will be fine, even with some kids who learn differently. Even worse, though, is that you're an entitled idiot. Please stay in MD.

-Principal of a Title 1 school in Fairfax

"Educators" like you are why we pay $40k/yr for our children.

[Anonymous]

Op here: not a troll and the school has two classrooms for grades over 1st.
But of course no one is forced to read or comment on my thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here: not a troll and the school has two classrooms for grades over 1st.
But of course no one is forced to read or comment on my thread.

Jesus you're a douche.

[Anonymous]

I remember feeling like the teachers and principal favored kids whose parents volunteered a lot around the school. Mine did not volunteer much which was not my fault and I remember feeling like it was unfair that those kids seemed to get special treatment

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Schools usually honor requests to avoid another child, so you can ask why this request was not honored.

However for all the rest, shame on you, OP!

What you expected was highly unethical and immoral.

I have been on the PTA Board for years, and would not tolerate it if my child received favors as a result. That is NOT why I volunteer.
I want to help all the students, not my children in particular.

And as the parent of a child with special needs, I find your remark about the slow learner particularly offensive. At our MCPS school, children with special needs do not slow down the rest of the class - they have aides in the classroom, who help others as well as the child in question, so it's actually a bonus for everyone.

You are a disgusting human being.

I agree with you that OP's request was improper. But you have unrealistically rose colored glasses in claiming special needs students don't slow down the class and actually benefit others because of aides. In truth, it is a mixed bag and depends on a lot of factors, including the SN kid(s) and the aide(s). I've had circumstances where there have been frequent, significant disruptions and others with few disruptions and the aides were able and willing to help other kids.

I am not suggesting the SN kid shouldn't be in the class or get extra help, but that extra help does sometimes come at the expense of other kids and the pace of the class. Pretending otherwise doesn't help anyone.

Also, remember not all SN kids have aides, exacerbating the problems and taking away some of the potential benefit.

Too bad. SN kids have a right to be in the classroom. If you don't get that, go private.

Can you read? That was my point. They do have that right. I just thought the PP was being dishonesty in saying it was always a positive for other kids in the class.