I'm 29 he is 24, is that too much of a gap?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So surprised by the responses here. DH is 40 and I'm 45. We married when he was 28 and I was 33. Had kids when he was 30/32 and I was 35/37. It has never been an issue at all. It's not a big age difference. He's always been more mature than me, anyway!! I don't worry about him running off with a younger woman! Go for it, OP!!

Right. It's never been an issue. Never will be. Your husband never ever ever thinks about what it woukd be like to be married to a younger woman. (He was, originally.) Because he thought you sexy at 33, he thinks you just as sexy at 45.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So surprised by the responses here. DH is 40 and I'm 45. We married when he was 28 and I was 33. Had kids when he was 30/32 and I was 35/37. It has never been an issue at all. It's not a big age difference. He's always been more mature than me, anyway!! I don't worry about him running off with a younger woman! Go for it, OP!!

Right. It's never been an issue. Never will be. Your husband never ever ever thinks about what it woukd be like to be married to a younger woman. (He was, originally.) Because he thought you sexy at 33, he thinks you just as sexy at 45.

Yep. He is 100% still attracted to me. Probably helps that I actually look younger than him ... still.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The real issue is that an age gap like that signifies one or both of you are undesirable mates in some respect and are settling. Why cant you or he find someone more age appropriate? It signifies desperation on your part and inability to attract someone younger and hotter on his part.

When you are 39 and he is 34, if you are still together, he will be in his prime and you will be long past yours.

Guess what happens then?

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The real issue is that an age gap like that signifies one or both of you are undesirable mates in some respect and are settling. Why cant you or he find someone more age appropriate? It signifies desperation on your part and inability to attract someone younger and hotter on his part.

When you are 39 and he is 34, if you are still together, he will be in his prime and you will be long past yours.

Guess what happens then?

+1

Nice try, 22:45

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The real issue is that an age gap like that signifies one or both of you are undesirable mates in some respect and are settling. Why cant you or he find someone more age appropriate? It signifies desperation on your part and inability to attract someone younger and hotter on his part.

When you are 39 and he is 34, if you are still together, he will be in his prime and you will be long past yours.

Guess what happens then?

+1

Nice try, 22:45

He really, really wants to believe that one day he'll have 'the upper hand' over women in terms of attractiveness. The world owes him this, he thinks. But bitter wishes on an anonymous message board doesn't make it so.

[Anonymous]

This is my parents age gap. It's always been a non-issue. He was really mature. My mom likes that people assume she's his age .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The real issue is that an age gap like that signifies one or both of you are undesirable mates in some respect and are settling. Why cant you or he find someone more age appropriate? It signifies desperation on your part and inability to attract someone younger and hotter on his part.

When you are 39 and he is 34, if you are still together, he will be in his prime and you will be long past yours.

Guess what happens then?

+1

Nice try, 22:45

I'm not 22:45, and I'm not even a guy, i'm just realistic, why would a man in his prime be attracted to a middle aged woman, of course there are expectations but expectations are not the rule. Let's just say in a couple of years he is 30 and not ready for marriage or children, she get's dumped, she will be 35 by then and probably has to settle for a divorced guy with a lot of baggage or she ends up alone, he can date a hot 27 year old and have a family a couple of years later, because he has time she has not.

[Anonymous]

The younger you are, the more important it is to consider age differences in dating respects.

I would continue to date him and get to know him better. Only time will tell if he wants the same things out of life that you do.

Some guys mature earlier than others so this wouldn't be a deal-breaker in my book.

[Anonymous]

I am 30 so not much older than you OP and i can't imagine what i would have in common with an 24 year old guy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am 30 so not much older than you OP and i can't imagine what i would have in common with an 24 year old guy.

+1 This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am 30 so not much older than you OP and i can't imagine what i would have in common with an 24 year old guy.

Not all 24 year old guys are the same. Much like not every 30 year old woman is the same.

I've been in your position almost to a T and it worked out great for many years. If you have two mature adults, the age won't really matter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am 30 so not much older than you OP and i can't imagine what i would have in common with an 24 year old guy.

Really? It's barely a difference at all. It's the same generation. I know several couples with such an age "gap." The difference disappears completely as couples get into late 30s and 40s. OP, go for it!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Depends on where he is with his life. I can tell you that at age 24 I might have enjoyed an extended roll around with a 29 year old woman, but I can admit that I'd not have been a suitable long term partner for her at that age. I changed significantly between age 25 and 30. You just have to determine if your 24 year old is ready for the same things that you are, and equipped to handle them.

Five years in general isn't so much, but 5 years at this stage might be. Only you can determine that.

This is a good point. I dated my ex-bf when he was 24-27 years old. We were quite a good match, except that he was just too immature during that time. I broke it off with him because of that. By 29-30, he had matured a lot, so we probably could have made it work long term if we'd stuck with it until then.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The real issue is that an age gap like that signifies one or both of you are undesirable mates in some respect and are settling. Why cant you or he find someone more age appropriate? It signifies desperation on your part and inability to attract someone younger and hotter on his part.

When you are 39 and he is 34, if you are still together, he will be in his prime and you will be long past yours.

Guess what happens then?

+1

Nice try, 22:45

He really, really wants to believe that one day he'll have 'the upper hand' over women in terms of attractiveness. The world owes him this, he thinks. But bitter wishes on an anonymous message board doesn't make it so.

She really really wants to believe that her age doesn't matter in terms of being judge as attractive by men. But the mirror doesn't lie, and when she looks into it without a truckload of makeup on, all she can do is cry bitterly and regret her wasted youth and current, and perpetual, isolation and loneliness. Jealously of younger women doesn't make you more attractive, I'm afraid.

[Anonymous]

It really depends on the guy. 24 and 29 is no big deal, but 24 year old men vary wildly in maturity levels at this age. If he has his stuff together and seems ready to get serious, then why not?

Remember the Dirty Old Man/Cougar Formula:
(your_age * 2) + 7, round up = youngest_you_can_date_without_being_skeevy

So you can date a 22 year old.