Dry housewarming, worried guests will bring alcohol

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thanks!!! No no I would never reject a gift, just feel bad if I won't serve it. I think I make go with something at the bottom- like no alcohol served. You guys are all a great help!

If you only say no alcohol served, that could just be because it's an afternoon party. It doesn't give guests a heads up not to bring alcohol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You should try to let your guests know ahead of time that you don't drink or serve alcohol. A bottle of wine is my default gift for a housewarming party, and I would quickly piece together that yours is an alcohol-free house when no alcohol was served at your housewarming party, and I would feel bad that I did not bring a better suited gift for you.

If I didn't know you were a drinker, I'd actually probably assume you were cheaping out by not serving beer or wine; then I'd feel guilty for not knowing this information about you and bringing you a bottle of nice wine. (That you will dump away.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't drink but if I have guests to my home I am obligated to provide them everything that brings them comfort and joy. They are after all my guest, I am not theirs. I provide refreshments which they enjoy, otherwise why invite them over.

I'll have a prostitute, please. Actually, make it two.

If you and the people who would invite someone like you to their home engage in illegal activities I'm sure you will be comfortable.

Well if it's going to be that kind of party I'm gonna stick my dick in the mashed potatoes.

[Anonymous]

There better be ranch
I like to drink a cold beer
Or ranch in a glass

-Flip Driscoll

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thanks!!! No no I would never reject a gift, just feel bad if I won't serve it. I think I make go with something at the bottom- like no alcohol served. You guys are all a great help!

Someone may take this to mean you won't be providing alcohol and will bring some. Whether it's beer to drink or whatever.

Something like "alcohol free" might be clearer..?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You have to accept it and say thank you. If it's wine, I'd actually open it and serve it to the guests that are there wo do drink. Pour the rest of any open bottles down the sink and register the rest.

I think this is the most polite action you can take.

[Anonymous]

18:59 back again. You could always just say that you keep a dry household and leave it at that.

[Anonymous]

You have a long time to think about this and talk to your guests. Between now and spring make a point of talking with them and see if you can bring up your reasons for not drinking, or your religion, or whatever. Then it is less strange to "remind" them when you send the invite.

I'd err on the side of mentioning that you don't drink for religious reasons. I think that people are more likely to respect than and read it as "don't bring alcohol" vs "alcohol free" which might be a bit off-putting.

[Anonymous]

OP, I don't drink. Not for religious reasons, but for personal reasons. I always serve beer and wine when I have a party because the majority of people will enjoy having it.

I once talked casually with a rabbi about when you accidentally eat something unkosher and he pointed out that we have a very forgiving God, and as long as our intentions are pure, we're good with God.

I don't know what religion you are, but I would think as long as YOU don't consume any alcohol, you'd be fine, even if you served it. Just serve what people bring, then pour out the open bottles and re-gift the un-opened bottles. (I always put a post-it with the name of the person who gave it to me and wrap it around the bottle with a rubber band so I don't give back to the person who gave it to me)

[Anonymous]

I'm crying thinking of you all throwing out fancy wine and drinks that guests bring. Eek.

[Anonymous]

If I didn't know someone well enough that they were aware that I didn't drink or serve alcohol for religious reasons, I probably wouldn't invite them to my housewarming in the first instance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If I didn't know someone well enough that they were aware that I didn't drink or serve alcohol for religious reasons, I probably wouldn't invite them to my housewarming in the first instance.

WTH? She's inviting HER NEW NEIGHBORS. Once upon a time, this would have been considered extremely hospitable. Only on dcum does something so pleasant and neighborly become something to criticize.

OP, I do not hold any beliefs that prevent me from serving certain foods or beverages, nor does anyone in my home suffer from potentially deadly allergies or addictions. So I serve all kinds of food and drink, and happily accept the same. I often bring a bottle of wine with me to parties. But I certainly understand that other people have different circumstances, and I am not so demanding or inflexible that I cannot adjust my expectations and behavior to such minor inconveniences. I hope that all your new friends and neighbors feel similarly.

I would do exactly as the Jewish poster above did regarding her kosher home. Her wording was clear and polite and won't leave anyone in doubt about what (not) to do. And then you won't have to worry about this when they come over next time. Since many of these people are neighbors, hopefully you will enjoy each other's company and be seeing lots of them.

Best wishes, and congratulations on your new home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If they bring wine, say "how lovely, I will just go open it!"
Run into the kitchen, and flush it down the sink. Decant some alcohol-free wine into the same bottle, return to the party, and serve it up to the unsuspecting guests.
Win-win!

Even better, replace the wine with poison. Then they can explain to Jesus why they insisted on sucking down the Devil's brew.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If I didn't know someone well enough that they were aware that I didn't drink or serve alcohol for religious reasons, I probably wouldn't invite them to my housewarming in the first instance.

I would do exactly as the Jewish poster above did regarding her kosher home. Her wording was clear and polite and won't leave anyone in doubt about what (not) to do. And then you won't have to worry about this when they come over next time. Since many of these people are neighbors, hopefully you will enjoy each other's company and be seeing lots of them.

Best wishes, and congratulations on your new home.

This. Presumably the housewarming party is the first in a long line of invitations to visit, or else why would you invite them to your housewarming party? Best to establish the norm now, to avoid awkwardness on the next visit. (and to weed out all the @ssholes who don't want to be friends with you if you don't drink/serve alcohol in your home.)

[Anonymous]

How about a brunch open house type party? You can serve coffee, tea, pastries, breakfast casseroles and people will not expect alcohol or be disappointed not to have any. Also they will be less likely to feel like they need to bring gifts.