How did you hide money from your spouse pre-separation/divorce

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everytime I went to the grocery store I did 10 or 20 bucks over the amount on my debt. I did this for 4.5 years.

If I had 4-5 years to do this, I would for sure. Seems pretty foolproof

It does seem foolproof. After all, if you went to the store 104 times a year (twice a week) for 5 years and took out an extra $20 every time, you'd end up with the huge sum of...$10,400.

Sure seems like sticking around in your shitty marriage for 5 years. You can buy half a car to drive away in.

where do you save the cash? what form of account?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Need some tips

No tips on how to do so on a short time frame, but everyone should start building a secret cash stash the moment they get serious about a relationship. You never know if/when things may go south.

There are a thousand reasons to do this... partner could turn out to be an abusive jerk and you may need to leave in a hurry... all kind of things could happen.

It should be a "grab and run" thing, not a saving account or something that can be traced.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everytime I went to the grocery store I did 10 or 20 bucks over the amount on my debt. I did this for 4.5 years.

If I had 4-5 years to do this, I would for sure. Seems pretty foolproof

It does seem foolproof. After all, if you went to the store 104 times a year (twice a week) for 5 years and took out an extra $20 every time, you'd end up with the huge sum of...$10,400.

Sure seems like sticking around in your shitty marriage for 5 years. You can buy half a car to drive away in.

The marriage doesn't have to suck for a spouse to start doing this kind of thing.

To me, it's just common sense.

There's no need for the other person to know every last detail of your life, and a secret cash stash is part and parcel of that, to my mind

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do you anticipate for your children?

They'll be taken care of.

Sure. They'll be scared for life. You know that, don't you?

Scared of what?

Trauma. Resiliency is a grand myth.

Oh this person again.

Not sure how I survived all the 'trauma' from my parents divorcing 30 years ago.

I must have been lucky.

Nope. I didn't start the myth of resiliency thread. Sorry.
Just as you, your children shall be predisposed to divorce. Do you really want that?

Not OP but YES, I do want my kids to know that getting out of a sucky relationship (marriage or otherwise) is an option and can be done.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everytime I went to the grocery store I did 10 or 20 bucks over the amount on my debt. I did this for 4.5 years.

If I had 4-5 years to do this, I would for sure. Seems pretty foolproof

Then place cash in a safe deposit box at the bank. The SD box is in your name only.

Interesting. I had not thought of this one. Thanks for the suggestion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do you anticipate for your children?

They'll be taken care of.

Sure. They'll be scared for life. You know that, don't you?

Scared of what?

Trauma. Resiliency is a grand myth.

Oh this person again.

Not sure how I survived all the 'trauma' from my parents divorcing 30 years ago.

I must have been lucky.

Nope. I didn't start the myth of resiliency thread. Sorry.
Just as you, your children shall be predisposed to divorce. Do you really want that?

How about if you go hit yourself in the face with your bible. Or your DSM IV, whichever is closest at hand.

[Anonymous]

It can be done but requires careful planning. Frankly, there are multiple ways to do this though the larger the amount the more difficult it becomes. If it is a question of stashing a few thousand dollars, it is relatively easy.

Having said this, I'd also advise against it because it is illegal since you would likely fail to disclose such information on a financial disclosure form.

I am not impressed with arguments that it would surface on discovery because quite honestly most lawyers are not that meticulous about such details unless it is staring them in the face. They will pick up on obvious siphoning of funds.

As far as lying, yes it is not a good idea to do so but OTOH there is a lot of deceit that goes on during a divorce and people lie if they can get away with it.

Go with a pre-nup whether you are a man or a woman because that is the clean way to avoid such problems in the future. A pre-nup does not mean that you intend to divorce but it does mean that you recognize it could happen and the best time to work out such details is not when you are in the throes of a divorce or after a marriage does sour.